The Misadventures of the Lady Marauders
by Lady Marauders
Summary: Four apparently normal high school graduates accidentally suck themselves into the Harry Potter world, separated and at the mercy of various HP characters.
1. The Vanishing

__

So it was stupid of us. I'll admit it. But what were we to think? We were just cynical suburban girls, (oh god, I was now from the suburbs); too tired of this life and the way that it was run. We needed a little magic in our lives, something to wish for beyond the president getting a brain before he blew up our country, or that two of us could get married regardless of who we chose.

So we did the "logical" thing. I found that hitchhiking guy with the ice blue eyes and the wolf dog and asked if he'd known someplace "magical" in his travels. I really just wanted a place where four girls just out of high school could go and pretend they were more than they were. More than just three white girls who hadn't really left Maine to travel for traveling's sake, and a bi-racial girl with too much attitude who wasn't sure how to do anything else. I wanted a small adventure we could call each other up and laugh about when the distance of college got too much.

He smiled at me. Said if that was what I wanted, he knew the perfect place for four girls like us.

" It's a small cabin up in the woods of New York. Every time I send people there, they always come back with a story to tell, if they decide they don't like it well enough to stay." And of course I decided that he wasn't really a bum at all. Just a rich guy who got his kicks reliving ennui by dressing down and thumbing around the country. So I took the address and key from him. 

Let it be known now. Among the four of us, there was the caring voice of reason, the beautiful realistic one(who was also the moody one, but we loved her any way), the overly practical and somehow optimistic cynic, ( don't ask how that one worked), and the crazy/sarcastic, do-it-now-before-I-change-my-mind, yes-that's-a-tattoo, wild one who never planned anything out if she could do it on a whim and survive. Guess which one I was?

And so being the last one, I talked my friends into a short weekend in the cabin. ' Just three days' I said. ' It's summer, what could happen?' I said.' We'll. Be. Fine.' I said. I lied. I lied on all accounts.

Did you know that there are places weak enough that you can fall through space and time into other worlds? Did you know there used to be one in upstate New York? Did you know that if everyone in the room in a cabin in upstate New York just happens to be at least the tiniest bit passable at Latin, that you can open your way into those worlds quite accidentally? Most importantly, did you know that if you don't hold tightly to each other, you'll end up in the same time, but different places?

" Neither did we."

*****************************************************************

Arnica

*****************************************************************

I open my eyes slowly, holding onto my stomach like it's all I have to anchor me to the world. Actually, I'm trying to anchor it in my body, but you don't want to hear about that. Trust me, it's not a pretty sight. I lie under the bright blue sky, staring up at the puffy white clouds. Fleetingly I hope, desperately, I've just gotten myself smashed and staggered out of the cabin and fallen asleep on the ground. A lack of trees above me tell me this was not the case. I'm in a field somewhere. Near by, a figure crouches by a stream. There was definitely no stream near the cabin. My lower lip pokes out, trembling.

" Zoë?" I call nervously, my voice small in the air and small in my ears." Dia-chan?" I sniffled a bit then. " Sock?" None of my brunette friends ran over to comfort me. Instead there's simply a tall man with long black hair, tangled through with bit of leaves and sticks, his eyes worried as they light on me.

" So you're up then." His voice is rough. He sounded like hadn't used it much, but one thing was certain. He was definitely _not_ American. I put my head in my hands and begin crying. He becomes alarmed. " What's wrong?"

" M-M-My sister t-t-told me I'd e-end up lost over s-s-seas if I didn't stop playing!" I wail. " I didn't mean to get drunk and end up in E-E-England!" He smiles at me.

" It's okay. We all make that one bad apperation." He soothes laughingly. " You're just lucky you didn't apperate where that lightening hit the ground." I wrinkle my forehead and sit up slowly, scooting backwards some. This man is crazy. Beautiful, I will give him that ( Sort of a mix between one of my old teachers and a backstreet boy), but undeniably out of his mind.

" A-apperation? Like disappearing and re appearing?" I ask slowly, standing on wobbly legs. God, even crazy hermits who pretend they are British and live in the woods of New York have read all the Harry Potter books. He nods. 

Fine. I must only have wandered away from the camp and have forgotten. In fact, I bet I'm not even drunk. I bet I'm just dreaming. Because I know that if I dreamed about waking up in a field all alone in a Harry Potter world, I'd want to wake up near a Sirius Black who looked like a mix between my favorite teacher (who for the sake of his family shall remain nameless) and Kevin form the BSB. I wrinkle my nose. Okay, normally, I'd dream him smelling a bit better, but I ate about three plates of beans and little brandy/barbeque sauce weenies, so perhaps I'm a little weird from that. Yep. I've fallen asleep while my fourth year Latin scholar friends try and figure out what was lying around with the great runes on the cover.

" Yes, apperation." He says patiently. " Can you apperate out of here?" I shake my head. This is actually a pretty cool dream and I am in no hurry to end it. Instead I reach up and untangle a leaf from his hair. He blushes slightly and tries to get the long tangle in a semblance of order. I grin and get up on my knees, the falling sensation leaving my stomach finally as I continue to gently untangle the bit of debris. " What are you doing?" He asks in shock. I look at him in surprise. This is normally the part where dream!Sirius succumbs to my many charms and...you don't want to know that either.

" I _adore_ long hair." I whisper in his ear. " And yours is too beautiful to have leaves stuck in it." If Dream!Sirius hadn't given into before now, that should have been the part where I can rest assured of sweet dreams. Instead, he grabs my wrist.

" Who are you?" He stands and is menacing and very tall. My normally tall five foot ten frame is nothing compared to the six two angry white man glaring down at me. Shit. This is not how dreams go!

" I'm Arnica." I yelp as he squeezes my wrist a bit tighter. The pain is sharp and hot and when I thrash, it doesn't feel like everything is filtering to me through water. Gods, I'm actually awake and about to be assaulted by this man. The blood stops flowing to my hands and I can feel them beginning to get cold as I hold still and take a few deep breaths, trying to clear my mind as he shots out questions. Things like who sent you and how did you know where to find me? I'm stalling, but I'm supposed to do something else... oh yes.

I pull back suddenly and use the momentum to bring my size twelve boots up to knock into his crotch. He makes a small noise and I kick him once in his knee caps to make sure he stays down, and run as fast as I can the opposite way. I'm doing pretty good by the way until my three inch heels (did I mention I love heels?) twist under me, and I fall into a large hole with a sickening crack.

I had never broken a bone before now. I scream very loudly and for a very long time. Then I cry for a while because I now have a very angry rapist coming after me and I can't even run away. Shifting a bit, I look down and realize that my foot was tangled around the strap of my project grad bag. The bag that was between my knees when we sat down to look at the book that called to all of us.

:: The room was spinning and there was a bright blue/white light. One of us screamed? Maybe we shared one scream?:: 

I shake my head of the weird thought and look up to see a very large black dog looking down at me, growling. Hastily I reach in my bag and pull out a mechanical pencil. If push comes to shove, I can always try to poke it in the eye while it's ripping out my throat. And then my attacker is there, staring at me oddly.

" That's not a wand." He says softly.

" It's a pencil and I swear I'll stab you in the balls if you touch me again. I swear I've had enough of you type of guys. I'm sick of this shit and I just want to know where in the fuck I am and how far from the cabin I am. If you tell me, I won't press charges, if you touch me, you'll have to kill me." Perhaps this would have sounded more intimidating if I weren't whimpering and sobbing, but he didn't touch me again. Simply slid down into the hole with me, his hand closed around a

::wand::

stick of some sort. He kneels by my broken leg.

" There aren't any cabin or inhabited area's here for about forty miles." He says softly, waving the 

::wand::

stick over my leg and 

::saying a spell::

muttering as if it would do any good. And then I realize I'm not crying anymore and that my helper-turned-attacker-turned-helper was helping me to my feet and that I was standing. Biting my lip I looked at him nervously.

" What's your name?" I whisper. He looks uncertain. " Please, I won't tell any one."

" Sirius.."

" Black." I finish numbly. " Oh god. I'm not dreaming. This is real..." I clutch his shirt looking around a bit desperately. " I don't belong here." I think I'm becoming hysterical because he sits me down and pats my back. " What did we do?!"

*****************************************************************

__

I don't know why we did it. It was stupid, right? Follow some strange hitch-hiker's directions into the woods of upstate New York? Spend a weekend there? See what happens? It sounds crazy even to me, and I did it. Me and my friends.  
  
Oh, I think I know why Arnica did it. The weird crazy guy told her about the cabin, and she thought, sure, let's do it, without giving it a second thought. She's like that, you know. Shoot first, ask questions later.  
  
I know why Sarai did it, too. She wanted to keep us from doing anything crazy. She knew I wanted to get plastered before going off to school. Maybe she wanted keep me from running around nekkid in the woods. Whatever. The practical one. Even she couldn't save us.  
  
My twin is more of a mystery to me. For Aradia, I think it was mostly the rebellion. A chance to say, "Fuck you, Dad. We're eighteen, and we're gonna do whatever we damn well please." She didn't say it quite like that, but you get the picture.  
  
Me? I went for a lot of reasons. Partly it was the adventure. Partly, the rebellion. Also, as Sarai feared, I wanted to get drunk. To know what it felt like and what I did, so I'd know not to do it at school. I never found out, though.  
  
Mostly, it was to get away. I wanted to spend a weekend with my friends where we didn't have to worry about parents, work, little brothers and sisters. I wanted to have one last hurrah with my posse before we all split up for the school year.  
  
That was before we found that damned Latin.  
  
You know how sometimes things don't turn out like you planned? That's what happened that night. It started out pretty innocent. We got there, hung out for a while, then we saw this book. A book full of Latin words.  
  
Now, as much as I used to complain about it, I love Latin. I took four years of it with a great teacher. I wanted to read the damned book. So Aradia, Sarai, and I started reading while Arnica looked on, amused.  
  
Did you know that if you say the right words, at the right time, in the right place, you can fall right out of your world and into another? I mean, shit, that's really gonna fuck you up.  
  
****************************************************************  
Zoë  
****************************************************************  
  
"Fuck!" A scream tears out of my throat before I can catch it. The entire left side of my body is in pain. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!!" I yell, tears of pain streaming down my face.  
  
Cursing myself silently for my stupidity in falling over (who knew I was so tired?), I sit up, ignoring both pain and nausea, and look around to see if any of the others saw my fall and subsequent outburst.  
  
My eyes meet the surprised face of a man standing directly in front of me. The surprise is gone, however, as he starts laughing, blue eyes twinkling with humor. He looks down at me, offering me a hand up, face a mixture of sympathy and amusement.  
  
"First time apperating?" he asks, still laughing. "It happens to the best of us."  
  
"First what?" I exclaim. My head hurts too much to deal with psychos, and this guys got to be psycho, because I thought I heard him say…  
  
"Apperating," he repeats. "Don't worry, I won't tell your friends."  
  
I stare at his hand as though it's going to bite me. "I must have hit my head harder than I thought," I murmur. "Where's the cabin? Where're the girls?"  
  
The man looks down at me, concern creasing his forehead. "Are you all right? Do you need medical assistance?"  
  
"Great," I mutter. "Even my hallucination thinks I'm crazy." I look back up at him, fighting back the nausea that occurs if I move my head too much. "I'm fine. In a whole lot of pain, but fine. Even finer when I wake up. What's your name, figment?"  
  
He frowns. "I think I should take you to see a doctor. Can you stand?"  
  
"Of course I can stand," I snap, irritated that this dream character is questioning my fitness. He grabs my left wrist and pulls, trying to help me up.  
  
I don't get up. Instead, I scream as shooting pains from my shoulder fill my consciousness, dimming sight and hearing, before finally canceling itself out, as my world fades to black.  
  
When my eyes open again, all I see is white. _Is this heaven? Where are all the beautiful women? No fair!_  
  
I sit up, hoping for a better view of paradise, and realize I'm in a hospital bed (Oh God, what did I do?). I look around for a friendly face - my parents, stepparents, twin. Hell, even my brother would be welcome now.  
  
Instead, I see the brown-haired man from my dream. He looks relieved to see me awake. His face breaks into a smile.  
  
"How are you doing, Zoë?" he asks.  
  
I look back at him, confused. "Uh… Fine… How do you know my name?"  
  
"We opened your wallet and pulled out your driver's license. An American, huh? You went a bit off course, didn't you? Don't worry, we'll find a portkey to take you home."  
  
"A… What?" I ask, knowing I must be dreaming again (Did I ever wake up?).  
  
"Portkey." (No more Harry Potter for me…)  
  
"Where am I?" (I am dreaming, right?)  
  
"You're at the Diagon Alley Clinic for Non-magical Injuries Obtained Through Magical Means. You had quite the concussion. And with the cracked ribs and dislocated shoulder, it's a wonder you were conscious at all."  
  
I stare at him dumbly. "I'm not dreaming, am I?" I manage to ask (No, stupid. You don't feel pain of lose consciousness in dreams.).  
  
"No…" he says slowly. "You're fully conscious… Are you going to be all right?"  
  
I feel the color draining from my face. "My friends aren't here? I'm not in the cabin?"  
  
"No… I think I'm going to call a nurse…"  
  
"And you. Please tell me your name is something innocent, harmless. Bob Smith or something like that. It's just a coincidence that you look exactly like I would imagine… But you're not. Tell me you're not." I'm babbling, and shaking. I look crazy, I know I do. (Should have left that Latin alone…)  
  
He looks at me like the lunatic I appear to be. "No. My name is Remus Lupin. I teach Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts. Doctor!"  
  
My eyes roll up into the back of my head as I faint for the first time in my life.  
  
Oh, God. What have we done?  


*****************************************************************

  
_I don't know why we all did it. I think it was for many reasons. Arnica did it for the adventure. I now that. She has always complained about how Gorham, Maine was such a boring white-people town. Zoë probably did it for the fun. One last party with the girls… I think that the only reason Sarai did it was because we talked her into it. She was always the careful one, the mother to us all. _  
  
_I did it for lots of reasons. One of them was the adventure. I've never had a really good adventure, and this seemed like a good place to start. I also wanted to spend some time with my friends. After all, we all were going away. Most of us to college… It would be a long time before we had a chance to do something like this again. I guess, if I'm being honest with myself, I probably got talked into it. After all, I am generally a careful person. The last reason I did it was for the rebellion. My father always thinks that my twin and I are really horrible children, just waiting for a reason to be in trouble. I guess I wanted to prove to him that I could do something without his permission. After all, I was eighteen, and I didn't have to listen to him anymore._  
  
_Stupid reasons, huh? In order to get back at my father, I got myself into, well, this…_  
  
_And when we got to the cabin… I of all of us should have known better. As the only certified Witch of the group, I should have seen "Sic desiro, sic ille erit" as a red flag. After all, what ordinary Latin poem ends with "As I will it, so it will be?"_  
  
***********************************************  
Aradia  
***********************************************  
  
I didn't fall very far, about five feet at the most. And my landing was pretty soft. Before I hit the pavement on the street, my body slammed into someone, breaking my fall.  
  
My head was spinning, and I felt a little queasy. It felt almost like I'd drunk too much, but a little different. I recognized the feeling. It was the feeling of having done magick. As a Witch, I've had the feeling before. It's the feeling of when a spell has worked. It also happens to feel like being drunk. Drunk on power.  
  
When I opened my eyes, I immediately wished I hadn't. Standing over me were two people, both dressed in what looked like robes. Not bathrobes, but, well, like the robes I would like to have had for my rituals. Magick robes. One of them was a boy, about my age. He was beautiful. His hair was white-blonde, like a vela from the Harry Potter books. In fact, he reminded me a little bit of how I'd imagined Draco Malfoy looking. Except it wasn't, because that was impossible. The other person was obviously the boy's father, and the one I had hit on the way down. He was glaring at me with anger in his eyes so intense that I was afraid.  
  
"I'm so so sorry!" I scrambled to my feet, ignoring the pain in my back. "I don't know what happened! I was just… And then…"  
  
"Stop talking, girl." The man waved a stick at me, and murmured a Latin word that my mind registered as Latin, but I couldn't think of the translation for. My babbling was cut short as I felt my voice leave me. Try as I might, I couldn't make a sound.  
  
"You will speak only when I ask you a question. Do you understand?" I felt myself nod, though I really didn't understand at all.  
  
"What is your name?"  
  
"Aradia."  
  
"How did you get here?"  
  
I felt myself answering, as though the words were being pulled from my unwilling lips. "I used an ancient Roman spell written in a book in the middle of a cabin in New York."  
  
This felt too real to be a dream, or a hallucination. I started, for the first time, to get really scared. This was real, and I was lost in a place I didn't know. I was among strangers who seemed to have no problems hurting me. I didn't know what was going on. I was separated from my friends, and I didn't know how to get back.  
  
The man looked at me with contempt, mistaking my fear of the situation with fear for him. Though, I must admit, I was afraid of him. "So, you are an American witch." He shrugged. "I guess I didn't need to worry about you after all. Everyone knows that Americans are hopeless. No wonder you landed like this. Couldn't even manage a simple Apparition, could you?" He sneered at me, turning to his son. The boy, I noticed, was glaring at his father. Clearly, they had just had an argument, but he seemed reluctant to let the man know he was unhappy. Ashe saw his father turn to him, I saw him change his expression to mimic the look on his father's face.  
  
"Please, sir, I'm lost, and I need help. If you could tell me where I am, at least, and help me out, I would be grateful.  
  
The man, ignoring my plea, walked off, calling his son to" Come," like a dog.  
  
I found myself in the dark alley, alone. I started to walk around, slowly, trying not to attract any attention. I feigned interest in the things I saw in the windows. From what I saw, it looked like a haven for mean-spirited practical jokers. Either that, of a place for Wiccans who decided not to live by the Rede.   
  
The first thing I saw were cages full of huge black spiders. Stifling a scream, I sidled across the street, walking now next to a store who's sign told him it was called Borgin and Burkes.  
  
There were black "poisonous" candles, a tray set out with what looked like acrylic nails. A sign above it said "Human fingernails, fresh picked from a three day old corpse." I shuddered. It wasn't that close to Halloween yet. Why did they have something like that out already?  
  
I followed the twisting road down, watching as each shop sold more horrible things than the last. There were skins from deadly snakes, what looked like voodoo dolls, really well painted renditions of shrunken heads… All of it looked so… Real, I decided. By now, panic was sinking in. I wouldn't cry, I decided. After all, that wouldn't get me anywhere. I felt my heart skip a beat, like it does every now and again. I hid in the shadows of an abandoned doorway as I heard footsteps getting closer.  
  
I heard the person go into a store. I quickly decided to leave my hiding place. After all, I had every right to be walking down the alley, and I was just being silly, hiding in the shadows. I looked out, checking to see that no one was around. I slipped out of my place, walking down the road, pretending that I hadn't been hiding.  
  
A minute later, I wished I hadn't. There was the guy again, the son of the one who had talked to me. He was walking towards me. I quickly turned around and started walking the other way. I heard the footsteps of the silver haired guy coming towards me faster.  
  
I glanced over my shoulder. He was jogging towards me, an expression of purpose on his face. My eyes widened with fear. When I was little, I was, well, raped by a guy, and I was terrified that it could happen again. And here was _this_ guy, following me, in an abandoned alley, and I just wanted to escape because I was so scared.  
  
I broke out into a run, not caring that it looked stupid for me to be running away from some teenager who didn't even look that scary. I felt my stomach drop out as I looked up in front of me. Dead end.  
  
I slowly turned around, watching the blonde come closer. There was nothing I could do. I was never very good at self-defense. I shut my eyes and waited for the worst.  
  
It never came. Instead, I heard a voice.  
  
"Why did you run away?" I looked up. The guy looked positively puzzled. "Look, Aradia, I'm only trying to help you here." They guy rolled his eyes. "Okay. I'm Draco. You asked my father where you are, and now I'll tell you. You're in London. Knockturn Alley to be exact."  
  
I gulped. No. There must be plenty of people named Draco in London, and J. K. Rowling must have gotten her street names from reality. That must've been it.  
  
I turned my attention back to Draco.  
  
"I'll hide you under my cloak, and hide you in my room when I get home. I would give you a room of your own, but my father has invited hundreds of wizards from all over the country, and most of the rooms are full. You'll fly on my broomstick with me, and we'll get home that way. I'll tell father that I just feel like trying out my new broom. Do you understand all that?"  
  
I nodded, deciding that this _was_ a dream, after all. After all, this was the Harry Potter world, and it couldn't be real. I decided to just go with it. It would be more fun that way.  
  
"Wait, Draco, why are you doing this?"  
  
He turned to me, an ironic smile on hi face.  
  
"Because my father told me not to. This, at least, is something I _can_ do." I shrugged, understanding. That was, after all, why I had embarked on this journey in the first place, so I understood his reasoning.  
  
I felt him throw a cloak over me. I could see nothing of my body. Suddenly, I just wasn't there. I saw Draco start to walk away. I followed him, walking as silently as I could manage.  
  
After a while, Draco motioned me to stop.  
  
I heard him talking with his father, cold boredom in his voice as he asked if he could ride on broom home. His father agreed, telling him not to be too late coming home.  
  
After Draco's father left, we walked along the Alley, following its twists and turns until we burst out into a sunny street. I removed the cloak, giving it back to Draco so he could put it away for as long as we were here.  
  
A large sign told me that we were on Diagon Alley. Draco turned to me suddenly. "Do you have a wand?" I shook my head, confused. "I didn't think so. I didn't think you were really a witch, either, but you obviously have some power if you could use that spell. Do you have money?" I grinned.  
  
"That I do have. When we left for New York, I was afraid that we would have some trouble. So I emptied my bank account. I have about a thousand dollars with me." I thanked the Goddess that She had made me at least a little careful.  
  
Draco raised an eyebrow. "Muggle money?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"We'll have to get it changed for you. Gringotts is just around the corner." He walked away, not looking back to see if I was following. Deciding to keep going along with it, I followed, checking my jeans pocket to see if I still had my money with me.  
  
When we got to the bank, I stopped. The goblins at the bank looked, well, like nothing I'd ever imagined. I frowned. Wasn't a dream supposed to beat least something like what I imagined?  
  
Still puzzled, I followed Draco into the marble building.  
  
Ten minutes later, we walked back out. In wizard money, I had 500 galleons, 16 sickles, and 27 knuts. 

"Wand first." Draco led me into a shop, Olivanders. I settled into the solitary chair and waited. This isn't a dream. I decided. Whatever we did with the spell brought us here. I have to find the others. Until then, I'm going to enjoy myself as much as I can. I smiled and settled more comfortably in the chair, waiting for a wand, waiting for my future…

*****************************************************************

"Just three days," she said. "It's summer, what could happen?" she said. "We'll. Be. Fine." she said. Remind me never to listen to her again.  
  
I knew this was a bad idea- okay, so maybe I didn't **know**_ something would happen, but, c'mon, four teenage girls just out of high school, piling into a '93 Buick (seeing as how I'm always the chauffer) and heading into the wilds of New York- we were asking for trouble. But does anyone listen to me? No. Instead, I get, "Oh, come on, Sock- stop worrying so much!" and "Yeah- nothing'll happen, we're just gonna have some fun." Some fun. Huh. So, fine- I have a tendancy to worry a bit. Well, it's not my fault- my mom watches too much Dateline. Besides, one of us has to be able to be realistic, right?  
  
Okay, so maybe I didn't argue quite as much as I could have. Maybe I could have just said no, I'm not going- you're all crazy. But maybe I was also getting sick of my little brother and hey, I love the bookstore as much as the next person, but I was ready for a few days off. And, yeah, we were all splitting up for college and stuff after the summer... Besides, if I didn't go, I'd regret it later, when they all came back laughing at stuff that happened, and no one had gotten hurt. So I went. Like I've been saying- Stupid, stupid, stupid. You know, considering I always wind up being the mother figure in our little group, you'd think I'd have some common sense. And you'd think, that after knowing Arnica for four years- never mind four years, knowing Arnica _**period**_- I'd be smarter than to let us do this without a bigger fight than the one I put up. I really should have pressed her about who she got the cabin from. Then again, if I'd done that, I probably would have regretted it.  
  
In any case, I'm sure that nothing I ever imagined happening was ever anything like what did....  
_  
******************************************************  
Sarai  
******************************************************  
  
I felt like I had a hangover. Of course, as I've never had a hangover, or plan on ever having a hangover (as alcohol frightens me on many levels), logically I knew- somewhere in the back of my mind- that this was not a hangover. But it was the only thing that came to my mind. Maybe because of the argument we had in the car on the way down about drinking... _Arnica wouldn't have broken that rule, not after the fuss I made... Would she?_ Then again, even if Arnica was laying in a corner plastered, it would not have explained why my head was pounding, and my back felt broken and I thought I was about to be violently ill.  
  
As my head began to clear, the pain in my back and neck grew sharper and the roller coaster feeling in my stomach increased. Drawing in a deep breath, I groaned slightly and mustered up enough energy to open my eyes slowly. Blinking, I waited for my vision to clear, and winced in the sudden light. _I must have hit my head- hard_, I thought, because I was staring up at a ceiling that seemed impossibly far away and realized vaguely that it did not look like the ceiling of the cabin. There was a searing pain directly between my eyes that I recognized as the beginning of a gigantic headache- one of those 'just-let-me-close-my-eyes-and-leave-me-the-hell-alone' headaches that make it hard to think straight. Maybe a migraine, but I'm not sure what a migraine feels like, because I've never been told, "you're having a migraine." Ditto for hangovers, but as I've never drank more than one of those tiny cups of wine at communion, I know I've never had one.  
  
_Where is everyone?_ I think wearily, shutting my eyes again. You'd think that if I fell and hit my head, at least Aradia would be doing something about it. Considering she's the will-be doctor. With my eyes shut, my headache began to ease slightly, and so I kept them shut, trying to block out the voices I was beginning to hear. I was tired, and I figured that it would take too much energy to get up and find out where my friends were. If I fell asleep, I could get rid of this headache, and then help Zoë and Aradia figure out the rest of that poem... And keep Arnica from eating all the Jelly Bellies...   
  
Just as I was slipping off into sleep, I felt someone's hand on my back, gently pushing me up. I started and blinked rapidly, choking back a cry of surprise. A kind, accented voice said gently, "You poor thing, here. Drink this." I found myself accepting a mug of what looked like tea, and I drank it obediently, not sure of what was going on. I stared into the cup as I drank slowly, forcing myself not to panic and start sobbing as I did so, because I was suddenly very positive that I was no longer in our little cabin in the woods, and that none of my friends were with me, and that I had never met anyone with the voice I'd just heard. While I carefully looked nowhere but into my cup, I couldn't help but hear people talking around me, all with British accents.  
  
"Molly, careful now. She might have a concussion, or she could have hurt her back."  
  
"Hit the table hard, didn't she? Broke it, even."  
  
"Fred, you've a bowl on your head."  
  
Hey! You're a poet and don't know it."  
  
I make things rhyme all the time."  
  
Shut up, you two!" This was the first girl's voice. "Is she all right, Mum?"  
  
I think so," the first voice said quietly. I worked frantically to even my breathing, as I was beginning to hyperventilate and felt tears of panic building up. I looked around cautiously, as if by looking I was making all of this real. _It's a dream- it's a dream brought on by too many Jelly Bellies and Diet Pepsis, and maybe the water you washed those pears in wasn't good, and you've just passed out after an extremely long game of Scrabble and you'll wake up and find the cabin a mess and you'll have to blare the Spice Girls to wake up Zoë and Arnica. I'm tired from the drive, and sick from the junk food- Fritos and barbeque sauce do _**not **_mix. We worked too hard on that poem. You're dreaming, Sock._ But even as I thought this, I knew that I'd never actually felt pain in a dream, and I'd never had a dream this strange before...  
  
Looking around, I found myself in a small, cozy kitchen- or rather, I imagined that under normal circumstances it would have been cozy. Because I realized with a flush of embarrassment that somehow I was sitting in the center of what had once been a table, set for breakfast. (_If Aradia were here, she'd pounce on me to see if my scalp is red- which I'm sure it is_.) And that with the exception of the woman holding me up as I drank my tea, the room was full of people- all of them with red hair. Bright red hair. I'd never even seen that hair color in real life- it was an even more vivid shade than that of the boys I baby-sit for, which I had always thought was about as red as you could get, while still being a natural red-head. And, yes, one of them had a bowl of porridge upside down on the top of his head, his twin- I was assuming that they were twins (how could they be anything but?!)- splattered with its contents.   
  
"Nice look, Fred, actually. Rather compliments your hair," another boy- apparently my age- said with a smirk as he handed something to who I was guessing must be their father, a tall, thin man with thinning red hair and worn deep green... robes. My eyes widened slightly at that revelation, and they swept quickly over the others in the room- the twins, their brother and the one girl in the room- standing beside Fred and wringing her hands worriedly- were all in shorts or jeans and tee-shirts. However, the boy standing in the doorway wearing glasses and a shocked expression, was wearing the same sort of clothes as his father. I felt sick. _If I didn't know better, I'd think I'd just been dropped into the middle of some sick fanfic..._  
  
I shut my eyes again, swallowing hard. To my surprise, I still felt sick to my stomach, but I recognized the feeling as that of fear- the same knot and twisting, eating-at-your-insides feeling that I get when I hear thunder or see lightning. And, amazingly, I realized that my headache was fading and my back was beginning to feel better. Instead of calming me, this only made the knot in my stomach twist tighter. I felt suddenly light-headed.  
  
"Are you all right, dear? Do you think you can stand up?" The woman's voice asked gently, and I felt her hands on my arms, helping me to stand when I found myself nodding. I stood and she guided me toward the nearest chair, where I sank, feeling stupid and embarrassed and scared and not sure of anything. I think that I was in too much shock to really react- how in the world had any of this happened... _What_ had happened?  
  
"Now, then, dear," she said, smiling kindly at me. "Are you feeling better? That must have been quite a shock, landing like that." She turned, looking over her shoulder. "Ginny, would you get her something to eat? There's more food on the stove." She smiled at me again, while I struggled to process everything being thrown at me.  
  
"What happened?" The boy in the doorway asked, sounding slightly annoyed and astonished as he entered the kitchen, a frown creasing his forehead.  
  
All of a sudden, everyone seemed to begin talking at once. Ginny grabbed his arm and pulled him toward the stove, handing things to him as she talked, and Fred stood up, removing the bowl from his head and lunging toward his brother to try and get porridge on him.  
  
"Oy, Fred! Stop that!! C'mon!"  
  
"Aw, is ickle Ronniekins afraid of getting porridge in his hair?"  
  
"Yes, after seeing the way you two look."  
  
"Boys!"  
  
_Oh, god.... I must be dreaming._ I put my head in my hands and blocked out the noises of this strange family that was making my Harry Potter obsessed, over-fanficced (which is not a word, I know) mind spin. _This cannot be happening. There's no way- no possible way. Harry Potter is not real, no matter what. You are not where you think you are, these people are not who you think they are... Why doesn't anyone listen to me when I get paranoid and worried? Why didn't we just stay home this weekend... This is all Arnica's fault. If she thinks I got mad when she ate crab at that outdoor sushi place, that was nothing compared to when I find her again... I wanna go home... I don't wanna be here, I don't want this to be happening to me... I just want everything to be okay, I wanna wake up in that god-forsaken cabin and go home... _**What**_ is going on?!_  
  
Tears pricked my eyes and my throat closed up and I knew that I was going to cry- which was not something I wanted to do, but which was something I was surprised I hadn't done yet. I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyelids hard, forcing myself to breathe deeply and evenly and to fight back the waves of panic beginning to crash over me. Under my breath, in the back of my head I began reciting the Lord's Prayer over and over and over, which is something I usually reserve for thunderstorms, but which I figured couldn't hurt, as I didn't think I'd had a panic attack like this in a long time. Slowly I began to calm down and I could feel myself begin to regain control. Taking deep breaths, I told myself that I would be fine- these people seemed nice enough, and I would get back somehow. I was eighteen now, I should be able to handle myself better.  
  
Feeling even more embarrassed, I bit my lip and looked up into the kind face of the woman who'd helped me up. "You poor thing," she said gently. "Are you sure you're all right?"  
  
When I nodded feebly, she smiled broadly and moved away, and I found- to my utter shock and fear- that I was sitting at a worn, sturdy wooden table, completely whole and with no sign that it was the same table I'd just been lying on top of. One of the twins- with bits of porridge still stuck to his shirt, sat down next to me with a wide grin.  
  
"Hope that wasn't your test. Where were you aiming for?" he asked conversationally, reaching for a roll from the plate his sister set in the center of the table. She smiled at me and I found myself feeling a bit better- she had a very reassuring smile.  
  
"'Course, you can always take it again- our brother Charlie landed on a little old lady doing her shopping when he took his test. But I think landing on a table in the middle of breakfast makes a better story."  
  
"Well, it could have been worse, you know. You could have landed in the pond," the other twin said to me, sitting down on the other side of his brother. It was hard to tell them apart without the bowl on Fred's head. He smiled. They all seemed to be smiling... He gestured at himself. "I'm Fred, and this is George." He pointed at the other boy, sitting across from me. "That's Ron, and that's Ginny," he continued, nodding toward his sister and apparently not seeing the smile fading slowly off of my face. Rolling his eyes, he pointed to the older boy, sitting next to Ron, pushing his glasses up his nose. "That's Percy." He nodded at me. "What's your name?"  
  
"Uh.. I- I'm Sarai." _It's coincidence- that has to be it. Those books aren't real._ Even as I thought it, a small voice in the back of my mind whispered _What are you talking about? You are eating breakfast with your favorite characters from your favorite books...._ Swallowing hard, I worked up the courage to ask the question that was really bothering me. "Wh- where am I, exactly?"  
  
Their mother placed a bowl of porridge in front of me, smiling. "You're in the Burrow, dear."  
  
_Oh, god..._


	2. The Explanations

*****************************************************************

Arnica

*****************************************************************

" And so we were reading the book and then the next thing I _really_ remember is being here and convinced that I was just drunk or dreaming." I say, twiddling with my blue duffle strap. Sirius nods slowly, twirling his wand absently between his fingers.

" The four of you opened a small tear in space." He says musingly. " God, you should talk to Remus, he knows more about this than I do, but he's in Wales right now and we're in the arse end of England." I frown.

" Well, then we need to start walking or something, because I need to get to Hogwarts." He raises an eyebrow, looking at me oddly.

" And why would I take you there?" I cross my arms over my chest, standing up to face him.

" Because it's the one place in your damn world that we all know and if the others haven't already thought of going, then I can get help when I get there."

" I'm sorry, but I'm not taking you to Hogwarts. I'll take you to the nearest town and you can find someone to help you there." 

" Like hell you will!" He looks at me in surprise. " If you take me to a wizarding town you'd be locked up in a second, so You're just planning on dropping me by the nearest farmhouse where I'll have to deal with people who would lock me up in an asylum rather quickly! Look, no one appreciates the concept of saving one's own ass more than me, but I swear that I will make you one _very_ unhappy man if you don't help me." He smirks at me.

" And what will you do? Cry?"

" No, I'll hunt you down when you don't expect it. I'll knock your ass out, tie you up and leave you in the center on the nearest populated area with a wanted poster taped to your fucking head!" His smirk has disappeared, replaced by a glare.

" I won't be blackmailed." He hisses.

" And I won't be abandoned in someone else's fucking universe!" I shout. " So you can either help me or hope I don't run across someone who can contact the ministry and tell them to be on the lookout for a rather large grim like dog in any area Sirius Black may be reported in."

" I could kill you." 

" You wouldn't be able to live with yourself, knowing I only wanted to go home." It's my turn to smirk. His face tightens and I sigh. " Look, you think this is what I want? I don't exactly get off threatening to send innocent men into the pits of hell to rot! I just want to get my friends and go home. We have mothers, fathers and young siblings who think that four of us are going to be coming home in two days and you'd say fuck them all because you're too scared to turn into a big black dog and show me how to go home!" He stares at me silently and I throw up my hands. " You know what? Screw this, screw you and oh wait, screw you! I'm done with this." I sit down and dig my sandals out of my bag, flinging my bots into it. " I'll do it myself. I'll wander around fucking England for the next damn year if I have to and maybe one of my friends was lucky enough to find someone with enough stones to give a little help to some lost people."

" You can't just go traipsing off into these woods." Sirius scoffs. There's a full moon in three days and a pack of werewolves live ten miles from here. You won't make it to next week."

" Well, I hardly see how this is your concern." I snap. " You won't help me, but you can tell me all sorts of stupid warnings that I just can't seem to care about? You know what? When I heard about you, I was so impressed. I thought that you were so incredibly brave to have done what you did. I read about what happened in 93 and I hoped that if I ever had the opportunity, I'd be able to risk it all like you did." He looks confused, so I dig though my bag and pull out Prisoner of Azakaban, throwing it at his feet. He picks it up, palling. " Now, I'm glad I know you're really a coward. I hate illusions." I walk away.

You know, it got dark _very_ quickly. I huddle in the roots of a tree with a very thick limb balanced across my knee. About two my flashlight died and so now I'm just staring out into space and hoping nothing jumps out at me. I stared for a very long time before I fell asleep.

When I wake up, there's a fire in front of me and Sirius is there, his hands shaking as he reads through the last pages of POA. I dig through my bag and pull out a bandana, leaning over and wiping away a few tears that crept down his face.

" I can't apperate with you, and we're a really long walk to London.". He closes the book and frowns. " A really long walk. I don't even know if you _can_ walk to Hogwarts. It's unplotable."

" The train from 9 3/4 goes right up to Hogsmead right?" I ask, " We could walk from there right?"

" We couldn't get on the train. It's only for students and won't run until the first of September, that almost two months from now."

" But we could follow the tracks up to Hogsmead!" I'm getting excited now and I jump up, pacing. " If we get to the wizarding part of the train station, we can go to the track for the red train and just follow it!"

" We'll be walking for weeks." Sirius warns. I shrug.

" A few weeks of walking is worth going home. I drop to the ground and slip into my black sneakers. " Come on." He puts out the fire with a small stream of water and stands up next to me as I sling my bag over my shoulder, everything I have left of my world is in there. We are silent as we begin our trek.

*****************************************************************

Zoë

When I come to, the first thing I do is scream. I scream bloody, violent, serial murder. "Professor Lupin" tries to calm me down, but I know better than to shut up now. I don't stop until a doctor comes into my vision. He looks down at me as though I'm going to start frothing at the mouth.  
  
But I'm not the crazy one. "Doctor," I begin. "This man is crazy. He thinks he's Remus Lupin. He kidnapped me, took me away from the cabin, and my friends, and I want to go home, and..." I pause as the doctor looks more and more confused.  
  
"Miss-" he begins  
  
"Ms." I correct flatly.  
  
He glances down at me, puzzled. "All right, Ms. Shields, I don't know how much of a head injury you sustained, but allow me to clear up the record. Professor Lupin here did not kidnap you. He rescued you. Without his assistance, you would still be lying on the ground outside. I believe some gratitude would be in order."  
  
I shake my head. "You don't understand. Remus Lupin does not exist. He is a fictional character. Haven't you ever read the Harry Potter books?"  
  
The man claiming to be Remus Lupin swallows hard, looking stunned, as though I've taken his identity from him. But I can't have done that, because there is no Remus Lupin. The doctor looks at me as though I have multiple heads. "There are no fictional books about The Boy Who Lived. His life is interesting enough without adding more troubles. As for Professor Lupin, he is as real as anything you see here. He's as real as this." The doctor leans forward and pinches me, hard.  
  
"Ow!" I yell. "What the hell was that for?"  
  
"To remind you that this is not a dream, nor is it fiction. You are as healed as we can make you, and it's time for you to leave. Professor Lupin has generously agreed to take you in until we can figure out how to get you home. Have a nice day."  
  
With that, my new companion and I are transported out of the hospital and into the darkened street (It's nighttime already? I must have been out for longer than I thought.). Nervously, I look up at the so-called professor. Here, in the dark he looks a lot more menacing.  
  
Oh, God, I think. I'm out here in a dark, empty street with a possibly vindictive psychopath who I just said does not exist.  
  
He turns towards me. I close my eyes. I'm fucked.  
*****************************************************************

Aradia

I sat in the small chair in Ollivander's wand shop, waiting for Draco to return with the owner of the shop. The shop was full of long narrow boxes, floor to ceiling. The very air in the room seemed to quiet customers, as though a very stern librarian was standing over them.  
"Good morning!" I jumped as I heard the soft voice of Mr. Ollivander. He had walked up behind me, quiet as a cat. I turned around in the chair to look at him. He was an old and frail looking. His hair was an almost bluish shade of gray. His eyes were pale and shone like moons in his wrinkled face.  
He stopped a few paces short of me, looking at me in confusion. "So," he finally asked, "What happened? Did you break it? Misplace it? Was it stolen? How did you lose your wand?" I looked up at him in confusion.  
"I've never had a wand. This is my first one, unless you're talking about my crystal wand I had in my old home…" Draco hid a smile.  
"Mr. Ollivander, please allow me to explain on her behalf. This is Aradia, and she just arrived from America, a Muggle part of America. Apparently, American witches don't know how to recognize true wizarding talent, because they overlooked her, and no ordinary Muggle could activate a Roman spell. I have decided to help her to get supplies, and I will try to train her over the rest of the summer, and I will bring her to Hogwarts on the train. There I will explain things to Dumbledore, who will not turn her away. Now, if you could please help Aradia choose a wand?"  
The little man grinned and took out a tape measure. "Which is your wand arm?"  
"I'm right-handed." I held out my hand as I was directed and Ollivander began to take my measurements, measuring all parts of my arm, then my height, the circumference of my head, and all sorts of other measurements. After a while, the shopkeeper walked away, searching through the boxes and pulling some out. Meanwhile, the measuring tape was moving on its own, measuring between my nostrils, around my neck, and the distance between my eyes.  
"That's enough then," Ollivander commented cheerily as the tape measure dropped to the floor. "Try this one then." He held out a wand. "Willow and unicorn hair, ten and a quarter inches, very swishy." I took the wand and waved it. It did nothing. Draco grinned at my discomfort. Ollivander snatched the wand away.  
"How about this one, Ebony and phoenix tail feather, nine inches." I tried it, but he took that one away too.  
"Rosewood and unicorn hair, nine and a half inches, pliable." I took it, but it didn't work. I tried wand after wand, but none of them did the slightest thing. The pile beside me grew taller and taller, while the stacks of wands in the store grew smaller. Even Ollivander was beginning to get irritated.   
"I've heard of tricky customers," he began, "but this is ridiculous." Draco had sat down and was looking bored. We had been there for about half an hour. I tried still more wands, trying just about all the wands in the store.  
"Okay." Ollivander sighed. "I made a few wands a long time ago, they contained two different powerful magic substances in their cores. If you do not take to any of these wands, then I'm afraid I will have to conclude that you are as you seemed, an ordinary Muggle." Ollivander disappeared into the back of the store. He came back with half a dozen boxes, each with a golden clasp. He opened the first.  
"This one is holly, phoenix feather, and dragon heartstring. It's eleven inches, and inflexible." I tried the wand, feeling definite power in it, but observing nothing.  
"Okay, maybe not that one. Try this. It is made of lignum vitae wood; its core is made from a hair from the tail of a beautiful female unicorn, and the tail feather from a phoenix in its prime. It's quite springy, which is unusual for this kind of wood. It's ten and a half inches. Give it a try."  
I took the wand from him. When I waved it, I felt its power. It warmed in my hand. From the tip shot a plethora of red, yellow, and orange sparks. I looked up at Draco and Ollivander, who were both standing above me.  
Ollivander smiled, pleased to have at last found the perfect wand for me. Draco was staring, amazed that the perfect wand was such a powerful combination. I paid eight galleons for my wand and we left the store. Draco looked at his watch.   
"We have to be going back home. My father will be expecting me to be home soon, and we have a rather long ride ahead of us. We'll get the rest of your supplies later. For now, you can use my stuff for anything you may need. Let's go."  
We walked into a back alley, where I got Draco's invisibility cloak ready for when I would need it. We were, after all, afar way from his manor, and I didn't have to be hidden for the whole ride. I climbed onto the broomstick behind him, and we set off into the shadowy twilight.   
The feeling of flying was amazing. We soared into the air, and it was wonderful. I loved the feeling of the air hitting me in the face, loved the feeling of weightlessness, I gradually let go of the broom with my hands, and felt the amazing freedom of the flight.  
I had just closed my eyes when I heard Draco yell out, "OH, SHIT!" My eyes snapped open, but I didn't get my hands on the broomstick in time to keep from falling off as Draco had to stop suddenly to avoid a flock of birds in front of us.  
I started screaming as I fell, in slow motion, towards the ground…  


*****************************************************************  
Sarai, part 2  
*****************************************************************  
  
When Mrs. Weasley told me that I was in the Burrow, I think I went into a state of shock. I can honestly say that I do not remember the rest of that conversation, or even much else about breakfast that morning, except that I ate what was put in front of me and didn't quite have the frame of mind to answer the questions I was being asked. I didn't even really notice when Fred, George and Percy left with Mr. Weasley. At some point it must have been obvious that I was not quite with it, because Mrs. Weasley brought me another cup of tea, which I drank. And, amazingly, I found my head clear and the realization of what was happening hit me like a brick wall.  
  
Biting my lip, I smiled weakly back at Mrs. Weasley, more because she seemed to be waiting for some reaction than anything else. Instead of smiling back, she reached out and put her hand on my forehead, feeling to see if I had a fever. "Are you sure you're all right?" she asked, worriedly. I nodded, unable to say anything because I was sure I was going to really start crying.  
  
"Mum, she just fell out of thin-air into the middle of our breakfast," Ron said, shaking his head. "Stop asking her that." He yawned. "I'm tired," he muttered, rubbing his eyes.  
  
Mrs. Weasley frowned at him. "Well, you wouldn't be so tired if you hadn't insisted on staying up all night."  
  
Ron shrugged, laying his head on his arms. "I had to go, Mum. Besides, you told me I could."  
  
"Hmph," Mrs. Weasley muttered, her hands on her hips and her lips pursed. "Honestly, sometimes..." She shook her head and began collecting the plates from the table.  
  
Ginny slid into the seat next to me, and handed me something. "Is this yours? It was laying over there," she said, pointing.  
  
I gasped, taking my duffle bag from her and wondering how it had gotten there. I'd been sitting on it, when we'd started translating that poem back in the cabin in New York. Unzipping it, I began looking through it. Inside were a few changes of clothes, my pillow- because I have this thing where I need to use my pillow and not someone else's- a few blank books (why I'd brought them, I couldn't say), two books (_The Kitchen God's Wife_ by Amy Tan and _Spindle's End_ by Robin McKinley), a photo album because I'd promised to bring pictures to show the girls, and my bear. Maybe it's babyish, but I still keep Teddy around, especially when I go places, if for no other reason than he calms me down. And I was never happier to see him than right then. Zipping my bag again, I smiled at Ginny. "Thank you," I said quietly.  
  
"Where were you going?" she asked me, a slight frown creasing her forehead.  
  
"I... I wasn't going anywhere. My friends and I were in a cabin, in New York. We were just spending the weekend there, and there was this book, and..." I stopped, not sure how much I should tell them- I've read the Harry Potter books from cover to cover and I know what happens to muggles who find out about the wizarding world- I didn't particularly want to have my memory wiped.  
  
But, of course, by then I'd told them enough for Mrs. Weasley to come and sit on the other side of me. "New York? That's an awfully long way to apperate, especially if you didn't mean to."  
  
_"Can_ you apparate without meaning to?" Ron asked, now resting his chin in his hands. "I mean, it's pretty hard even when you're trying, right?"  
  
I stared at the grain of the table, not sure what to do next- if I told them everything, I didn't know what it would mean- how would I feel if someone just fell out of thin air onto my kitchen table and told me they were from a place where my life was a popular book series? And, from what I knew of Ron- in Book 4 at least- mentioning that the series was named after and based on Harry would not be the best move I could make. So, instead, I told them about the weekend we'd planned, and the cabin, and the book- but what caught their attention was the poem in the book.  
  
"How did it go?" Ginny asked, her brown eyes very wide.  
  
"She probably can't remember, if she read it and wound up in our kitchen," Ron said, looking to his mother. "Have you ever heard of anything like that, Mum?"  
  
Mrs. Weasley shook her head. "Your father may have."  
  
"Could it have been a portkey?" Ginny was tracing the patterns on the table as she thought.  
  
"Portkey?" came a voice from behind me.  
  
I must have jumped about a mile, turning in my chair as Ron said "Morning, Harry." If I hadn't resigned myself to the fact that I wasn't dreaming, I would have been certain of it then. Harry Potter walked into the kitchen, looking half-asleep and frowning. "Morning," he replied, sitting next to Ron. He smiled at me and looked at Ginny. "What about a portkey?"  
  
As Mrs. Weasley explained to Harry about me and how I'd gotten there, I was watching him and Ron. Ron was taller than Harry (which was obvious even when he was slouching), but not by as much as I'd imagined from the way the books made them seem- in fact, Harry was probably taller than me (and I'm 5' 7"). Harry's eyes were an exceptionally bright green, and his hair was a mess- of course, that could have been because he seemed to have just woken up. Ron's hair was just as bright red as the books made it seem, and the same shade as the rest of his family's. His eyes, I was happy to note, were blue, like I'd always thought, even though it's never stated anywhere what color they are. And, for the record, they were both quite cute.  
  
_But why is Harry here? _I thought, distractedly. _He doesn't usually come to the Burrow until after his birthday... Then again, I've only read through Book 4, and they definitely older than 14... Maybe things are different now. _I decided a moment later that this was the very least of my problems, as I noticed a calendar on the wall- the picture was moving- and it was labeled _July 1997_. I couldn't stop myself- "What?!"  
  
The other four looked at me, worried. "What's wrong?" Mrs. Weasley asked.  
  
I bit my lip- I supposed that it was now or never- I had to tell them more than I had wanted to. "Is... Is it really 1997?"  
  
I ignored the looks they shot each other, and stared instead at my bag in my lap. Finally, Ginny answered. "Well... Yes. Why?"  
  
I was shaking by then, and I knew I was going to cry. "I... It's not..." I didn't know how to say it. The only thing my mind could figure out then was that 1997 would have been the year the last book was going to be set- and all we knew about that was that You-Know-Who (suddenly even _thinking_ the name Voldemort was harder) would be at his strongest and the final battle would take place. _What have I gotten myself into?_  
  
"What year is it, then?" Ron asked, and I could hear the confusion in his voice.  
  
"2001," I answered quietly. In the utter silence that followed, I added, "I just graduated high school- I just turned 18. In 1997, I was only_ 14_. My friends and I, we were going to New York to have some fun before we went to college and stuff this fall. We just... There was that poem, and Aradia and Zoë and I took four years of Latin, so we tried to translate it, and then I was here. I mean, I guess I could be dreaming, but I don't think I am." I was babbling and I knew it- but I couldn't stop, and found that I was also crying, so I put my elbows on my duffle bag and pressed the heels of my palms into my eyes. "I mean, I've never had a dream like this, and I have a headache, and we're supposed to be home Monday afternoon, and no one's even going to notice we're missing until then, because when I called my mom, my cell phone didn't work very well, so she said only to call in an emergency, and this is an emergency, but even if I wanted to call, I couldn't because I'm in _England_, my phone's in my backpack in _New York_, and it's_ 1997_!"  
  
There was another shocked silence, which was broken when Ron said quietly, "Cell phone?"  
  
"It's like a portable telephone," Harry explained.  
  
There was a moment when I wondered if anyone was even breathing, before Ginny whispered, "Like a muggle telephone?"  
  
I looked up in time to see Harry nod slightly, and to see the way Ron's jaw dropped open and Mrs. Weasley stiffened slightly. She was probably thinking of all the things I could have seen or heard since I'd broken her table. Ron began shaking his head. "But... she can't be. I mean, how'd she get here, then? Besides, if it was 2001..." he trailed off, shaking his head. "I don't get it."  
  
"I don't either," I muttered miserably, clutching my bag. I did not want to be there.  
  
Mrs. Weasley patted my arm. "It'll be fine, don't worry. We'll figure all of this out." She stood. "I think I'll send a message to your father- he might have an idea."  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. "He'll want to interrogate her about that phone-thing." I didn't miss the glare she shot him.  
  
Biting my lip, I wondered if I should tell them that I knew what they were talking about- would it get me in more trouble or not? Sighing, I decided that at this point, nothing could hurt. "Um... Mrs. Weasley? I... I don't think I only... I mean... I think I did more than- god, I sound like I'm in a Sci-Fi movie," I muttered. They were all looking at me, and so I played with my Winnie-the-Pooh key chain on my duffle. "I... My friends and I... There's a series of books we read... And- and you're in them," I finished quickly.  
  
Mrs. Weasley sat back down.  
  
"I mean... I guess what I'm saying is... I don't think that even if it were 2001 and not 1997, I'd be able to get a hold of my mom. Not from here..." I trailed off, no longer sure of what I thought. I shrugged, biting my lip. "And I don't know where my friends are, or if they're even anywhere that I can find them."  
  
All of a sudden, Mrs. Weasley hugged me, and I hugged her back, trying not to cry and to listen as she told me that she was going to get Mr. Weasley and that they would find a way to get me home... She probably thought that I had lost it.  
  
A few hours later, I was exhausted and terribly confused as I sat- never having moved- at the table and listened to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley talk in low tones about what they should do. In the end, it was decided that Mr. Weasley would try to get a hold of Dumbledore- I almost fell off of my chair when I heard this- and that until he could give us some advice, I should stay with them- I obviously knew enough about them that I could at least pretend to be a witch.  
  
Ron, who- along with Harry and Ginny- had been banished from the kitchen when Mr. Weasley came back, had apparently been eavesdropping from the steps because he poked his head around the door, and said, "She can be a cousin."  
  
"What?" Mr. Weasley's immediate and confused reply cut off the lecture his wife had been about to give.  
  
Ginny, eavesdropping with her brother and Harry, re-entered the kitchen. "We can tell people that she's a cousin, maybe from Mum's side. At least at first, until we know what to do."  
  
"Yeah," Harry agreed, following her back into the room. "And you won't have to get the rest of the Ministry involved- they aren't going to want to listen to how this happened."  
  
Mr. Weasley nodded slowly, and I found myself holding my breath as he and Mrs. Weasley exchanged a glance. Finally, he smiled broadly at me. "Well, until we can find a way to get you home, would you mind staying with us?"  
  
I was so relieved I felt like I was going to faint. I smiled, feeling safe for the first time since I'd landed in the middle of the table, and nodded. If anyone could get my friends and I home, it would be Dumbledore. Of course, there was a corner of my mind that was screaming at me to think about all of this- _Dumbledore and the Weasleys aren't real_, it told me, but I couldn't believe that anymore. If I wasn't convinced of the reality of all this yet, I would never be.  
  
Ginny clapped her hands happily, grinning back at me. "You can stay in my room- it'll be fun."  
  
I smiled back at her, trying not to blush or laugh as I thought _Wouldn't Zoë be jealous if she knew I was staying in Ginny Weasley's room?   
_  
Harry opened his mouth to say something, but I didn't hear him- at the very same instant a small brown owl came hurtling through the open window, and I was shocked... It was talking. Well, yelling, actually, and it was the weirdest thing- it was as if I could hear him hooting and screeching, but at the same time I could make out words.  
  
"IdiditIdiditIdidit!!" he cried, bouncing off of the back of Harry's head onto Ron's. "I didn't get lost!! I did it!!"  
  
Blinking, I looked at the others- they were all acting as if it were perfectly normal for a small owl to fly madly about the room, congratulating itself. A few moments later, as Ron was wrestling with who I assumed was the infamous Pig, another owl came flying in the window, this one a large white one that landed carefully on the back of Harry's chair and glared at the other bird. I nearly fell off of my chair when she said, "Would you stop bouncing around and let him take his letter?"  
  
"I'm holding as still as I can, Hedwig!!"  
  
I gaped, my jaw hanging open. Nowhere, in any of the books, had it mentioned that the owls could talk. I must have looked pretty strange, because Ginny put a hand on my shoulder and asked if I was all right. Everyone was looking at me strangely and I tried to block out Pig's incessant chatter- he would not shut up.  
  
"I... Is it me, or does everybody else hear that, too?"  
  
They all exchanged glances and Mrs. Weasley frowned at me. "Hear what, dear?"  
  
I swallowed, wondering how crazy I was about to sound, but figuring that it was worth a shot- it had been a weird day, and it couldn't get much weirder. "The owls... they're talking."  
  
I missed the other's initial reactions, because Pig suddenly launched himself at me, banging into my forehead in his excitement. "You can hear us!! You understand what I'm saying, don't you? Don'tyoudon'tyoudon'tyou?!"  
  
"Yes!" I snapped, rubbing my forehead and frowning as he circled me, still gabbing away excitedly. _That owl is crazier than I ever thought he was..._  
  
Meanwhile, the Weasleys and Harry were looking at me as if I'd grown an extra head. "You... you can hear the owls talking?" Ron asked, disbelieve lacing his tone.  
  
I sighed. "Yes, and can you please ask Pig to stop that? He's making me dizzy."  
  
"Pig, shut up," Ron snapped, reaching for the over-energetic ball of feathers that was zooming around my head. "Would you hold still?!"  
  
I sighed, listening as Pig continued to screech happily as he struggled in Ron's hands. "He says he can't hold still- he's too excited."  
  
Ron frowned at me, and frowned at Pig, but said no more. Harry, meanwhile, was watching me and the owls carefully. "Can you really understand them?" he asked slowly, and I remembered that it was not entirely impossible that I might be able to hear an animal talk- after all, Harry could talk with snakes.  
  
I nodded, and he looked at Hedwig, as if running an idea over in his mind. "Could you... prove it somehow?"  
  
I frowned, confused. "Prove it?"  
  
"IknowIknowIknowIknow!!" Pig cried. "Tell them-"  
  
Hedwig cut him off, flapping her wings angrily and snapping, "Pig! That's enough!" She turned her large eyes to me and said, "Tell them that Harry's last letter was for Hermione."  
  
"Okay..." I repeated what Hedwig had said and the others all turned to Harry, who was gaping at Hedwig. She nipped his shoulder affectionately and apologized- I relayed the message, and Harry, looking stunned, stroked her head and shrugged. "Well, it was," he finally said, sounding surprised. He looked at me and smiled with a shrug. "So... Do they understand us?"  
  
I nodded as Pig began struggling to free himself in earnest, crying out as if by yelling louder the others would understand him as well. "Yes," I answered, frowning at Pig. He was too cute for me to be mad at, but my headache was renewing itself with a vengeance and I was getting very tired- I hadn't technically slept for over at least 24 hours, not taking into account the different time zones between New York and England.  
  
Pig continued to babble loudly, and it seemed as if everyone began speaking at once- which is bad enough under normal circumstances, but when you have a massive headache beginning to form and you can suddenly hear two owls speaking as well, it can be a bit overwhelming. I rubbed my temple gently, trying not to be obvious about it, but of course Mrs. Weasley noticed and began fussing. Before I knew it, I found myself being practically dragged up the stairs to Ginny's bedroom and I think I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.


	3. Making Due

*****************************************************************

I had junk food in my bag. Most of which I gave to Sirius, who apparently hadn't seen a bag on M&M's in years. So now, a few weeks into our walk, all you ever hear is my stomach.

I'm fat damn it! I need to eat!

Well, I was fat. Apparently walking at a steady pace for eight hours every day for over a month with nothing to eat save what a large black dog can steal from a farm every few days will do weird things like make you lose weight.

If I wasn't so damn hungry, I'd be ecstatic.

" Sirius..." He sighs.

" I know you're hungry." He says, not in annoyance, but more a resigned tone. " I forgot how often normal people eat."

" No, really, it's okay. Truth is, I'm actually pretty thirsty. I just want water, really." He smiles at me.

" You are such a liar." He laughs. " But there's a stream on the other side of those trees. If you go that way, I'll go and see if I can find something to eat." I don't think I'll ever get used to the sight of a large black dog where Sirius belongs, but he's running east now, so it doesn't matter. I turn around and go west, through the trees and look at the small _river_ with glee. It's cool and sparkling in the afternoon sun and for the first time in what seems like forever I realize how hot and dirty I am. I look left, I look right, and then I turn all the way around. No Sirius. No anyone.

So my black ass gets butt naked and into the water I go and for the first time since I landed here I'm not spending my time counting through the many ways that something could have gone wrong, or what we're all going to say when we get home. Instead, I'm just happy to be clean for once. Happy not to be marching around the woods of England commando-style (and let me tell you, I'm not talking about my fatigue pants _or_ the actual sneaking around) Happy to relax.

And fucking happy that the water is deep enough that I can cover myself, because of course this is the day that it doesn't take Sirius an hour to find something to eat. That's just the story of my life lately.

" Arnica! We're in luck! I found a hen house and...Bloody Hell!" Sirius drops the two birds in the dirt as I yelp and throw my arms up, covering my chest and backing up into water that almost covers my shoulders.

" Fuck all! What in the fuck Sirius! Turn the fuck around or something! Christ in Drag!" I yell at him as he continues to just stand there. He does so quickly, beginning to walk away before stopping.

" Arnica?" I wince. He's using _that_ tone of voice. That one that means he's got a bloody stupid idea and that he's going to make a big production of it before leaving it alone two seconds before I kill him. For the first time ever, I understand how Sarai must feel whenever I open _my_ mouth. " I don't suppose you could come out of that water a bit, could you?"

My jaw drops and he turns back around and laughs at my expression.

" NO!" He grins at me, lifting an eyebrow.

" Oh come on." He teases. " Just a quick peek? It's been a pretty long time since I saw someone other than myself naked."

" Not that long as you're still fucking staring at me!" I yelp. " Come on Sirius!" He's outright laughing now. If I had my suit on, I'd get out and kick his ass. Than again, if I had my suit on, I'd hardly be in this position. Murphy's law with a little catch 22 thrown in. " Sirius, if you don't go away, I'll get out of here, naked or not and beat your ass!" He outright laughs at me!

" You wouldn't dare!"

Excuse me? Me?! My middle name is Dare. Sarai says it's actually stupid, but that's beside the point. The point is that Sirius Black, for all intents and purposes, has just called me a coward. I will not abide that. I begin to walk forward and he blushes a bit, his face incredulous.

" Hey now! I was just kidding Arnica!" He begins, not moving. " look, you can just stay there and I can leave..." The water is at my waist as I pause and cock my hands on my hip, watching him with a bit of amusement.

" It's not wise to call my bluff Sirius." I smirk. " As is I should smack your bum for being so annoying." I think he likes the idea personally. It sure looks like he likes the idea. I grin and turn back to the water, walking deeper in. " By the way," I call over my shoulder. " You might want to join me in here. A, you stink and B, you've seen me naked. I think it's only fair."

It's the first time I've slept soundly in a month and I move my head off Sirius' chest reluctantly and reach for my lighter in my bag. After a few moments of fumbling, I realize, it isn't there. My lighter is gone. I can't start a fire now. In the dimming light of the sunset, my eye falls on Sirius' wand poking out of his robe's inner pocket. I reach across him and pull the robe onto my lap, taking out the wand. It's smooth and warm in my hand. I think a dirty thought and grin, crawling over to the small pile of wood that we had planned to cook out dinner on, chewing my bottom lip. I saw Sirius do this a million times. 

" Incedium." I murmur, waving his wand over the small pile. It burst into flames.

" You can use a wand?" He asks from behind me. His voice is weird and guarded. I turn around and he's crouched in the semi darkness. " Arnica, have you been lying to me?"

" I can't decide whether resounding sarcasm is appropriate here or not." I snap. " So I guess I'm just gonna say no and that you can suck my arse if you don't believe me." I stand up and take his robe, slipping it on to ward off the evening chill as I toss his wand on his lap and grab my bag, walking away from the clearing and back towards the water.

There are a few things I can't abide. One is being called a coward. The other is being called a liar. I sit down and pull out my Discman, slinging the headphones around my ears and digging my last cigarette out of my bag. And then I remember that I've lost my lighter. My fishy lighter that Zoë gave me. And then my batteries give out and symbolism comes crashing down on me. My music from home and my lighter from Zoë were really all that was keeping me tied to _my_ world. My music _was_ my world and my lighter _was_ my friends. All I had to cling to that I was going to get to Hogwarts and find them. And now they were both gone. I begin to sob. I have no ties left. I'm all alone now.

And then my head begins to pound painfully, getting more intense by the second. I drop my head into my hands as my sight begins to fade.

" Sirius! Fuck _all_! _Sirius_! _Help_!!!" My voice rises to a siren shriek as my back arches and my head snaps back. It feels like one of my seizures, but a million times stronger and with a migraine. I vaguely hear Sirius run up to me, and then my hearing is gone too.

*****************************************************************

Sarai*****************************************************************  
Sarai, part 3  
*****************************************************************  
  
Life in the Burrow was interesting, to say the least. The first week I was there, I did my best not to focus on the fact that I had been whisked into not only another dimension, but another time, and blatantly ignored the fact that my mom and brother probably thought that my friends and I were dead. Thinking that made me want to throw up. I couldn't think about my mom- if I did, it resulted in a breakdown and that was not something I liked doing. So, as a result, those first few days I forced myself to not think about my family or my friends- which almost worked. Except that then I had to meet Dumbledore. Although "meet" is a loose term. It was more that I knelt on my knees and talked to his head, floating in the fireplace. The result of that conversation was that I spent the evening sobbing into my pillow in Ginny's room.  
  
Apparently, Professor Dumbledore could do a lot of things and knew an awful lot, but he was not all powerful or omniscient. He didn't know how we'd managed to wind up in the situation we were in, but he felt that if I had been drawn in, then the others had as well- which was only a small comfort. I couldn't help imagining that they may not have been as lucky as I had and had wound up landing and breaking bones, or falling into the wrong hands... Thinking like that was as bad as thinking about my mom and brother. Since he didn't know how we'd gotten here, he also didn't know how to get us back, or even how to reunite us. He had looked sincerely sympathetic when I'd asked- nervously, because meeting with Dumbledore was very much like meeting with my old principal; I was nervous beyond a reasonable level- if he'd heard about or from Aradia, Zoë or Arnica. He said that he hadn't, and in the end, it was decided that I should come with Harry, Ginny and Ron to Hogwarts in the fall because it was the one place besides Diagon Alley and the Burrow that we all would know, and the one place we all might be at the same time. When he said that, and I realized that I would not be going home or be reunited with my friends before at least September, I freaked. I distinctly remember finishing the conversation and running upstairs in tears, crying until I fell asleep.  
  
After that, I made a fierce effort not to cry- if I felt like I was going to, I would grab a book or let Ginny drag me off to some corner of the orchard we hadn't been to yet. I was amazed by her- the books never really gave her a distinct personality, except that she was Ron's little sister, and that she had a crush on Harry. But, as it turned out, she'd grown out of her crush on him. She treated him exactly the same way she treated Ron, Fred and George. Percy had, I learned, moved to his own flat near the ministry, but he still turned up in the Burrow at least every other day. And she treated him the same way, too. She knew just by looking at one of them what kind of mood they were in and knew exactly how to get them to tell her what she wanted to know. Ginny was nice, too, and she had a great sense of humor and more often than not I found myself wishing that Aradia, Arnica and Zoë were with me because Ginny would have fit right in.  
  
Harry's seventeenth birthday fell about two or three weeks after I'd broken the kitchen table, and the event was heralded by the blaring of one of my CDs at about 4 in the morning- somehow Fred and George had gotten a hold of them and my CD player and had managed to make it play "Yellow Submarine" through the house at some ungodly volume.  
  
Ginny and I had stumbled into the hallway- I learned very quickly that while Ginny was normally a very sweet girl, she was not so nice if woken out of a deep sleep- and nearly been plowed over by Mrs. Weasley, looking ready to kill. When Ron and Harry stumbled down the stairs a moment later, Harry blinked sleepily when we told him Happy Birthday and then looked down the stairs toward the source of the music. His response was "Weird song."  
  
It was a great day- after seeing Fred and George reprimanded by their mother, we'd all gone back to bed, but found that none of us could sleep and so by five, we were all wide awake and Harry was sitting on the couch in the living room surrounded by presents. Fred and George had one surprise after another planned that day, and that evening there was a particularly lively Quidditch match in the orchard that resulted in Fred's dramatic fall into the frog pond. The day flew by and when we finally fell into bed late that night, we were all exhausted and Harry hadn't stopped grinning for several hours.  
  
I knew in the back of my mind that my own birthday was coming, but I had forced myself not to think about it because I was, after all, turning 18- which meant, among other things, that my friends could no longer refer to me as "jailbait" because of my former crush on a co-worker. (Who, it had turned out- to my immense surprise- was 30. I had honestly thought he was 25 at most...) In any case, I pushed all thoughts of my birthday out of my mind because I did not want to think about the huge party we'd planned, or how much I missed my family. I didn't mention to anyone that my birthday was coming, either, because Harry was still on cloud 9 about his and I felt bad about it- I'd already infringed upon them enough. I felt terribly intrusive, even if I knew that I was welcome. The Weasleys were always so nice, and it was easy to just fall into a kind of pattern.  
  
Fred and George left with Mr. Weasley after breakfast every morning, going to run their joke shop- what time they arrived back that evening depended on how business had gone and how long it took to close the shop. And they always came home with funny stories and merchandise that showed up in the oddest places. One night during dinner, we were eating salads when there was a loud noise and Ron was suddenly covered in tomato. While we all stared at him, Mrs. Weasley frowned and said, "Ron, don't play with your food."  
  
"Mum!" he cried, wiping his face with his napkin. "I didn't do anything! It just... exploded!"  
  
With a glare, she turned on the twins, who were turning an interesting shade of purple as they tried not to laugh. "Fred..." she said warningly.  
  
"Yes, Mum?" he asked innocently, smiling widely up at her.  
  
She immediately launched into a tirade. "You know better than that! How many times have I told you not to sabotage other people's food?! If you're going to live under this roof, you'd better-"  
  
George interrupted her, looking suddenly very serious. "Mum, come on. We told you, it's all right- we can pay rent if-"  
  
"You most certainly are NOT going to pay rent!" she cried huffily, sitting down with a glare.  
  
In the meanwhile, there was always something to do- which I was grateful for. It seemed that Ginny and I were always weeding the garden, which was huge and sprawling and reminded me of the garden we'd had at my old house, when I was little. If we weren't weeding or picking the vegetables, we were busy with some other little job and Harry and Ron were de-gnoming the backyard. In the evenings, we usually went out to the orchard and played Quidditch- or rather, I watched the others chase the apples and tennis-like balls I threw them. I'd tried riding a broom, once, but my fear of heights had instantly reared it's ugly head and I'd been extremely glad to be back on solid ground.  
  
One night, I'd woken up and glanced at the clock, discovering that it was 2:30 am on August 12... It took me a split second to realize that I hadn't even noticed my birthday sneak up on me. Biting my lip, I rolled over, searching for Teddy and finding him between my bed and the wall, and ignored the guilt that was tearing at me. I didn't like pretending that nothing was wrong. I didn't like trying not to think about my friends or my mom and brother. And right then, at nearly 3 am on my 18th birthday, I discovered that there was no way I could stay in bed without losing my mind and I got up quietly, sneaking out of Ginny's room and heading down to the kitchen.  
  
I poured myself a glass of pumpkin juice, wrapped the throw blanket I'd grabbed from Ginny's rocking chair around me and headed out back with Teddy. It was silent in the backyard and the grass was wet, but the sky was clear and I took several deep breaths of the clear, crisp night air. There'd been a thunderstorm that afternoon, which I had managed to survive with minimal panicking, and now the air was cooler and more comfortable than it had been recently. Making my way across the backyard, I noticed how bright the stars were and when I found the bench by the pond, I sank onto it and stared up, trying to find at least one familiar constellation. I fixed my sight on the brightest star in the sky and wondered vaguely if it was Sirius and then sighed as I thought again about where my friends were and how long it would be before I could find out if they were all right and I could see them. Biting the inside of my lip, I fought back tears as I hugged Teddy closer and tried not to break down- I'd done really well recently and it would just have to figure that one of the most important days in my life would fall when my family and friends weren't around.  
  
I was so wrapped up in self-pity that I didn't hear anyone approaching me and so when Harry said my name, I nearly fell off of the bench. "Harry!" I snapped, shooting him a glare even Arnica would have avoided. "Don't sneak up on people like that!"  
  
He shrugged and sat down next to me. "I didn't sneak up on you. Besides, what're you doing out here?"  
  
I frowned at him, my heart still racing in my chest. "Me? You're out here, too."  
  
He rolled his eyes and raised an eyebrow at me. "I came out because I saw you out here. It's almost 3:30, you know."  
  
I blinked in surprise at him- I hadn't realized I'd been out so long. "Oh... Well, it's not... I mean, I was just.... I couldn't sleep," I finished weakly, avoiding meeting his gaze. "I'm fine, though, so you can go back to bed."  
  
Harry laughed and I looked at him in surprise- I didn't think I was being funny. He shook his head at me and tugged at one of Teddy's ears. "Right, you're fine. Sarai, you and Ginny sleep through just about anything and you never take this guy out of your room unless you're upset. So spill it or I'll go wake Fred and George."  
  
I frowned at him. "No, you wouldn't."  
  
He started to stand, eyeing me. "Wanna bet?"  
  
I looked back down at the grass, biting my lip hard. I did *not* want to talk about it, because I knew I'd wind up in tears, which was exactly what I'd wanted to avoid. I felt Harry sit back down and he put a hand on my back. "Sarai, come on. You can tell me. I won't tell anyone if you don't want me to."  
  
Finally I sighed. "Harry, I really don't want to talk about it..."  
  
He was silent for a minute before saying quietly, "I know... But it would help, I think. What is it?"  
  
I listened to a nearby pair of kneazels arguing about something, but I didn't have the heart to listen. Instead I sighed and decided that I may as well tell Harry, if only to get him off my back. "Well, see... It's just that... I just sorta realized that today's my birthday, and I kinda needed to..." I trailed off, not sure of what I was saying and quite sure I was going to cry.  
  
Harry was quiet. "You never said anything about it.... How old are you?"  
  
"18."  
  
"Oh," he replied. He was silent for a long time and I found myself both wishing for him to leave and hoping he'd stay. "Sucks, doesn't it?" he finally said in a low voice.  
  
I looked up at him. "What?"  
  
He shrugged. "Well, on your birthday you're supposed to be with your family and friends, right? So when you're not..." He shrugged and smiled kindly at me. "It's not the same."  
  
I shook my head, feeling tears build. "Not at all," I muttered.  
  
Harry was quiet for another moment and then asked, "How do you usually celebrate?"  
  
I sniffed, shrugging. "Well, Aradia, Zoë, Arnica and I were going to drive up to Boothbay Harbor on the tenth, and spend the day there. Then we were going to have a sleepover, and go to the beach..." I rubbed my eyes, feeling my chest begin to constrict painfully. "And, well, my birthday's always... I mean... Mom's big on birthdays," I finished in a whisper.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
I nodded. "She... I have to go to bed early, so that she and Ryan- my little brother- can wrap my presents and set them up. And I can't get up before 8, but then I can wake them and we go down in our pajamas and everything's set up and then we get dressed and go to McDonald's for breakfast, or we go to the lake or something and spend the day together. And my grandparents come up in the evening for dinner..." I sighed. "I mean, it doesn't change much from year to year, but... Maybe that's what makes this so hard."  
  
Harry nodded absently, and shrugged. "Sometimes things don't go like we want them to," he said and squeezed my shoulder. "But there are worse places you could spend your birthday, right?"  
  
I smiled weakly at him, nodding slightly. "Yeah, I guess." My smile faltered. "It's just..." I was crying again and buried my face in my hands, trying to stop. Harry, after a moment, put his arms around me in a hug- this only made me cry harder as I hugged him back.  
  
I don't know how long I cried before I realized that this was *Harry* I was crying to, and managed to get myself back under control. Surprisingly, I found that I felt better, and smiled at him shakily. "Thanks," I muttered, feeling myself begin to blush.  
  
Harry just grinned at me. "Hey, it's not a big deal." He was quiet for a minute before grinning broadly with a dangerous glint in his eye. I eyed him suspiciously. He leaned back, hooking his hands behind his head. "Did you ever hear about what happened on my eighth birthday?"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I woke slowly, feeling groggy the next morning. Rolling over, I blinked at the light streaming in the window. Rubbing my eyes, I glanced at Ginny, who was sitting on her bed with a textbook in her lap. She smiled as I sat up slowly, looking at the clock. I groaned inwardly. 5 minutes to 8. Lovely, I'd managed to get less than 4 hours of sleep since hearing Harry's birthday horror stories. But I didn't want to go back to sleep, because then I'd never get up. So instead, I climbed out from under the blankets and smiled back at Ginny, still in her pajamas. "Morning," I muttered.  
  
"Morning," she replied, a bit too cheerfully. I glanced at her and caught the look on her face that meant she was up to something.  
  
"What?" I asked suspiciously.  
  
"What what?" she asked, blinking innocently.  
  
"What's going on?"  
  
"Why do you think something's going on?" She asked, pretending to be confused. "I'm reading," she said, holding up her copy of "Fantastic Creatures and Where to Find Them"- a much heavier, longer copy than the little paperback version I had back home.  
  
I frowned at her, but decided not to pursue it- I was too worn out. I shrugged and grabbed my shorts, purple t-shirt and a towel before heading towards the door. "Whatever, Gin. I- Hey!" I cried as Ginny leaped up and stood in front of the door, her arms crossed and a smirk on her face. I sighed. "Ginny, c'mon. I have to take a shower-"  
  
"Later," she told me, taking my things from me and pushing me back towards my bed.  
  
"Later? Why? Ginny, what are you up to?"  
  
"Nothing!" she cried, sitting next to me with a grin about a mile wide stretched across her face. "You can't leave this room until I say so, that's all."  
  
I was thoroughly confused and still half-asleep, so I didn't know if I should continue pressing Ginny for answers or not. Instead I frowned at her. "You look like the cat that ate the canary," I told her.  
  
Her grin just grew. "Good."  
  
"Good?!" I flopped back onto my pillow, groaning. "You are weird, Ginny Weasley." I shut my eyes, and after a moment opened them again. "Can I go now?"  
  
Ginny glanced at the clock and hesitated, looking back at me. After about half-a-minute, she grinned and grabbed my hand. "Yes, now you can."  
  
"Goo- Ginny, what are you doing?" I asked, confused, as she dragged me out of the room and we headed down the stairs. "Gin, really, I need my stuff. What're you doing?"  
  
"You'll see," she replied, shoving me through the kitchen toward the living room. I rolled my eyes. _I am too tired for this..._  
  
"Happy Birthday!"  
  
You could have knocked me over with a feather.  
  
I think I would have stood in the doorway all day if someone hadn't gotten me to go sit on the couch, where I sat, dumbfounded, while I looked around. On the table in front of me was a stack of presents, and Fred and George were hunched over something in the corner, whispering. Almost everyone was still in their pajamas, and when I came to my senses, I looked at Harry suspiciously. He just grinned back while Ginny shoved a package at me.  
  
It was amazing- I didn't know how Harry had managed to pull this off, until I talked with him and found out later that Fred and George had been looking through my CD book one day, found one of the CDs Arnica had made me for a previous birthday and read the date off of it. So they'd been planning this for awhile and hadn't said anything because I hadn't told anyone. But, apparently, the twins were planning on waking us all up with my CD player the way they had for Harry's birthday, but after talking with me the night before, Harry had convinced them to change the plan.  
  
It was great- after the presents, Mrs. Weasley made a huge breakfast and then Fred and George- who were taking the day off- took Ron, Harry, Ginny and I off "exploring". I thought I knew every inch of the land around the Burrow, but I was quickly proved wrong. It was fun, and I was never once left alone to think about anything other than what was happening as it happened. That night, Mrs. Weasley made a big meal and after, we went outside. My CD player and CDs were again put to good use, though I probably should not have let Fred and George choose what to play. Ginny and I were playing an interesting game of Exploding Snap, which I was not very good at, while Ron and Harry watched and offered advice occasionally.  
  
During our third or fourth round, Fred changed CDs. I almost fell off the step when I heard "Hakuna Matata" begin. We all started laughing- or rather, when I explained the context of the song, we all started laughing. Fred and George began acting like the goofballs they are, and I couldn't help but think of the last time I'd heard this song- on the way down to New York, we'd been playing the CD Arnica made me and it had come on. I had images of Arnica and Zoë waving their arms around in the backseat and Aradia pretending she had a microphone as we belted it out. All of a sudden, I couldn't take it- what had been building all day- all summer- threatened to make me lose it right there on the back steps and I felt like I was going to hyperventilate, so I smiled and stood, muttering some excuse about forgetting something upstairs. Turning to go, in the corner of my eye I noticed Harry stand as if to follow me.  
  
Once in the kitchen, I ran upstairs to Ginny's room, sitting on the edge of my bed and putting my head in my hands. I was so worried- hundreds of horrible things that could have happened to my friends were racing through my mind as I rocked back and forth and tried not to think that way... But I didn't know where they were, if they were safe, or if they were hurt or sick... And it had been over a _month_... There was no way for me to even let them know that I was okay... _And it's my *birthday*_, I thought desperately, blinking hard.  
  
I was about to break into hysterical sobs when there was a knock on the doorframe and I looked up, expecting to see Harry, or even Ginny. To my surprise, I saw Ron, standing almost anxiously in the doorway. "Hi," he said, smiling vaguely.  
  
I smiled shakily, gathering my composure. "Hi," I whispered, playing with the edge of my blanket.  
  
There was a moment of almost uncomfortable silence before he came into the room and sat down next to me on the bed. I could feel him watching me, but refused to look up, wishing that he hadn't followed me. _Of course, you knew *someone* would follow you...  
_  
"You okay?" he asked, his voice surprisingly worried. I looked up at him, meeting his eyes, and- it's absurd and horribly clichéd- I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach and had the breath knocked out of me. His eyes were very, very blue all of a sudden, and Ron looked oddly nervous, biting his lip and frowning at me.  
  
I forced myself to look away, feeling unnerved and confused and scared. "I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" I asked in a falsely confident voice.  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. "Sure, you're fine. That's why you ran in here looking like you were going to be sick."  
  
"Gee, thanks, Ron. I so needed to hear that," I muttered, feeling slightly angry. _Does he think he's helping?_  
  
Ron sighed, and I looked at him. He looked upset. "I didn't mean... Well, it's just..." He shrugged, smiling goofily at me. "I'm not very good at this."  
  
I couldn't help but smile back. "I noticed," I said wryly.  
  
Ron shrugged again and after a moment asked, "So... What happened? I thought you were having a good time."  
  
"I was," I answered quietly. I wasn't sure why I suddenly wanted to tell him... "I just got to thinking, that's all."  
  
"About what?"  
  
"My friends," I murmured, reaching behind him to pick up Teddy, toying with a loose thread from a seam my grandmother had sewn up once upon a time.  
  
"Oh."  
  
Ron was quiet, and I didn't know what to say, so we just sat there for a while. After a few moments, I looked up at Ron. I noticed, not for the first time, how tall he was- he was possibly even taller than my brother, which, when you take into consideration that Ryan is 14, may not seem like I'm saying much, but everyone who has seen my 6' 3" brother knows better. And that infamous Weasley hair was bright even in the semi-darkness, which was something I'd teased Ginny about more than once. Looking at him, I could practically hear my mother talk about how she didn't really like "wimpy" guys- of course, Mom's definition of a "wimpy" guy was a bit different from mine. She liked football-playing, Russian-mafia-looking guys, with dark hair. As for me, all of my former crushes- with the exception of two- indicated that I was the opposite- I tended to like the "wimpy" guys... Which had proven to be an interesting conversation, when Mom started picking on a co-worker I had a crush on without realizing that I liked him.  
  
Ron interrupted my thoughts, looking down at me and asking, "What were you thinking? I mean, you looked really upset..."  
  
The images I'd just chased from my mind came rushing back and I shut my eyes, trying to escape them, but it didn't work- they just got worse. "I... It's just that I don't know where they are," I said desperately. "I don't know if they're okay, or if they're hurt, or if they're even-" I stopped, feeling myself begin to hyperventilate and wiped my eyes hard, digging the heels of my palms into my eyes.  
  
"Sarai, I'm sorry," Ron cried, and when I got myself under control, I was surprised to see that he looked miserable. "I didn't mean to... I didn't want you to get upset again," he explained, looking really upset himself.  
  
I couldn't help it- maybe it was the lack of sleep, or the stress of trying to keep myself sane for so long, or the fact that it was my birthday and that I was stuck in Harry Potter world and Ron Weasley was trying to make me feel better, but I was suddenly giggling hysterically. It wasn't so funny, but the look on Ron's face as I began laughing was priceless and soon I was laughing so hard that my sides hurt and I felt tears in my eyes. I waved a hand at him, trying to let him know that I was, in fact, all right, but I was laughing too hard. After a while, I managed to stop laughing, but continued to giggle as I wiped my eyes and grinned at Ron, who was smiling hesitantly at me. "I'm okay," I told him. "Really, I am now." I took several deep breaths and discovered that I really _did_ feel a lot better. I smiled at him. "I really do."  
  
Ron grinned broadly at me. "I'm glad. I am sorry, though," he added, frowning again.  
  
I shrugged. "So, you're lousy at this. It worked anyway."  
  
Ron laughed. _He has a great laugh._ "You coming back down?" he asked. When I nodded, he smiled again. "Good." Then, he surprised me- he leaned over and hugged me quickly before heading back downstairs.  
  
I sat on the bed in shock for a moment. _Ron just hugged me..._ It hit me then and I fell backward on my bed, pulling my pillow over my face, which I felt begin to burn. Before landing in the kitchen of the Burrow over a month before, my favorite character in the Harry Potter books had been Ron. And now, living in the Burrow, we'd spent a lot of time together- that wasn't so weird. It was not possible to live in the Burrow and not spend a lot of time with everyone- I couldn't tell you how many conversations I'd had with Mr. Weasley about electricity and cars and computers. Or how many times Pig had smacked me in the forehead with some obscure question or request for Ron- like the time he asked if Ron would carpet his cage like he'd seen another owl's. But it wasn't as if we'd had much one-on-one time. The only person I'd spent any one-on-one time with this summer had been Ginny, after going to bed at night. And Harry, the night before. Well, we'd had a few interesting chess games, but after Pig helped me nearly beat him, any chess games between Ron and I were far more amusing and they were usually watched, if not by a crowd, then at least by Harry or Ginny, because everyone expected something to happen.  
  
_You are so stupid- why is it you always pick people you can never have any chance with to like? _I thought to myself, angrily recounting my many impossible crushes- there was the boy in 6th grade who'd moved away halfway through the year, but had been somewhat of a nutcase, anyway... There'd been the one in my freshman Western Civ class that another friend liked and wound up giving her number to- and then, when she'd decided he was a jerk, I'd had to hate him, too... And then, of course, there was always Aaron- the epitome of my absolutely horrid luck. _He was 30. 12 years older than you, dear. As Zoe and Aradia like to put it, 'He'd been canoodling since you were four...'_ I sighed into my pillow. And now, I was living with Ron... _This has great potential for disaster, now, doesn't it?_ All I could think of was how Aradia had lived- with her mother and Zoe, of course, with her crush for awhile when she was little... And now we all loved to tease her about it and we couldn't even hear his name without Aradia turning an interesting shade of red. It's impossible. Except... He'd come up to see if I was all right... _He probably thinks of you as a sister, Sarai, you idiot! You cannot like him that way... You can't! _But there was a little voice in the back of my head that decided to scream at me as I headed back down to my party- _Too late!!_  
  
When I went back outside, I tried to ignore that Ron was sitting behind me, helping me beat his sister and Harry at Exploding Snaps, and I tried to tell myself that I was just imagining that he was smiling at me more than usual. _You're just noticing it more because you've just figured out that you like him! _But it was kind of nice to think that maybe I wasn't imagining things.

*****************************************************************

Zoe

I stare into the darkness at my companion. Much to my surprise, he begins to walk away. I watch him mutely. _Perhaps, if I'm quiet enough, he'll just forget I exist. I won't die, and I can find my friends and pretend that none of this ever happened._  
  
He turns around to look at me. "Are you coming?" he asks.  
  
"I… Uh…" I'm stuttering like some brainless twit, but I can't help it. I never expected him to ask me along.  
  
"Look," he begins. "I'm not going to leave you, a muggle, out alone in Diagon Alley. There are too many fucked up wizards who would take offense to the fact that you're in here at all. Wizards who will do scary fucked up things to you before you can blink twice, now, are you coming?"  
  
"Yes," I say in a small voice.  
  
"Good." He starts walking again.  
  
I hurry to follow him, but before I take a step, my foot crashes into something soft and loud. Something that sounds roughly like a hunter green backpack with about four hundred key chains on it.   
  
[How would I know what the backpack looks like, you ask. It's dark, you say. You can't see that thing.  
  
I know, because it's mine. I've tripped over this thing in the dark more time than you can imagine, so I know it's my backpack. The question really is…]  
  
"How did this get here?" I murmur, stooping down to grab one of the straps and hoist it onto my back.  
  
Remus [Yes, I think, resignedly. This can only be Remus Lupin] turns to look at me. "It dropped out of the sky at about the same time you did," he replies. "I took it to the Clinic when I took you in. They must have tossed it out when they tossed us out."  
  
"Oh." I follow Remus in silence for a few minutes. "Hey, Remus," I call into the dark ahead of me. "Sorry I didn't think you were who you said you were.."  
  
"It's okay."  
  
We continue walking until we reach the door of what looks to be a very successful tavern. "This is the Leaky Cauldron," Remus explains. "We'll be staying here."  
  
I nod, and we enter through the brightly lit courtyard.  
  
When we pass through the doors, my senses are assailed by the many sights and sounds that fill the room. The first things I notice are all the people. Strange people take up every corner of what can only be the tavern's common room. There are hags, people wearing some strange sort of bathrobes, mostly people that, in my world, would be considered wackos. But I'm not in my world anymore.  
  
Remus marches straight to the bar, then glances back to see if I'm following. I pick my jaw up off the floor and walk quickly in his footsteps until we reach the bar.  
  
"Hello, Remus," the bartender greets my companion. "You've been out all day. Been busy?"  
  
"Err- yes, for the most part. I, uh, met a friend while I was out, and I wondered if you had any empty rooms for her to stay in?"  
  
"Hmm…" The bartender looks at me critically. "A friend, eh? I didn't think you-"  
  
"Never mind, Tom," Remus interrupts, blushing slightly. "A room, please."  
  
Tom takes out a slip of what appears to be parchment and glances over it. "Sorry, Remus, we're all booked. D'you think she can stay with you?" He winks at us suggestively.  
  
Remus rolls his eyes, grinning at the innkeeper. "Yes, Tom, that will be fine, though not quite in the way you think."  
  
"Right," Tom replies, making a great show of being unconvinced. "You'll be off to bed then."  
  
"Yes," Remus answers. "The young lady and I have had quite a long day."  
  
"Right, well, see you in the morning. Will you be down to breakfast?"  
  
"Yes, Tom. See you in the morning." Remus heads off to a staircase in the corner of the room, obviously expecting me to follow. With a quick wave to Tom (who winks in return), I follow Remus to his room.  
  
For a moment, we just stare at the room. It's pretty simple. A chest of drawers, a door that can only lead to a bathroom, two nightstands, and one large bed.  
  
"Well," says Remus briskly. "That won't do." He takes out stick from his pocket and points it at the bed. "_Dividio!_" he orders it. The bed springs apart to form two smaller beds. "You can have the one by the window, if you'd like. I'll take this one." He sits down on the bed closest to him.  
  
"Sure," I reply, dropping my backpack on the other bed and opening it. I thank every force that's listening that I had the presence of mind to pack like this was my day pack at camp. Everything I was worried that I might not be able to find is here, in my backpack, including my pajamas. I reach past my CD player and grab the gallon sized plastic bag I'd stuffed them into, before dashing off to the bathroom to change into the tank top and flannel pants.  
  
When I emerge, Remus has already changed for the night into some silky looking boxers, and is turning back the covers to his bed. I stare at him, until he looks up.  
  
"What?" he asks. "Does this bother you? I can change-" He makes a move for the dresser.  
  
"No," I reply. "It's not that. I'm gay. I don't care what you wear. It's just… Are those aliens?"  
  
He blushes. "Yeah. A… friend gave them to me."  
  
I shrug. I'm not going to press. "Well, good night," I say hopping into the bed by the window.  
  
"'Night," Remus returns, rather sleepily. He is already in bed, eyes closed.  
  
_I think I'll do the same. So what if I slept most of the rest of the day? I'm rather tired, and I think that a good night's sleep will work…_  
  
I yawn in the middle of the thought.  
  
_Wonders,_ I finish as I begin nodding off to sleep.  


*****************************************************************

Aradia 

The exhilaration of flight quickly turned to blind terror as I went flying off the back of Draco's new broomstick. I saw the ground get closer and closer. I shut my eyes, waiting for the impact, the one that would probably kill me.  
It never came. I opened my eyes again, expecting to see that the trees were still rushing to meet me. Instead, I saw that I was being held about ten feet above the leafy canopy. The very air was holding me up. I turned my body around to look up at Draco. He was flying his broom lower, as though to catch me as I fell.  
He came to a stop next to where I lay in the air.   
"Could you please give me a hand getting back up onto your broomstick?" I smiled up at him. "I seem to be able to make the wind hold me up, but I don't want to push my luck." I took the hand he offered and pulled myself back onto the broom.  
"Next time, Aradia," Draco admonished, "hold on tighter."  
I grinned at him. "Will do, sir." We laughed together as we lifted back up into the air. This time, I held on.  
_Wow, if only the people from my school could see me now,_ I thought, amused. _They always thought that I was a witch, and now, I am what they wanted me to be. On a broomstick and everything._ I grinned, remembering my freshman year. _I'm not a lesbian, though, as they also thought. _I almost laughed out loud, thinking of those times.  
A group of people had thought that my friends and I were a group of lesbian witches. They were right about some of it. We were witches at the time. And one of us turned out to be a lesbian. The last of my euphoria faded as I thought of my friends. I didn't know where they were, if they were all right, if they were even alive.  
_Oh, Goddess, I miss them_. I sighed unhappily as we soared along. In front of us loomed a huge house, a mansion. This must be Malfoy mansion, I surmised. I whipped the cloak over me, hiding my presence from view.  
I stared at the manor, amazed at its size. I had never seen anything like it. It was huge and black, with turrets and widow's walks, and every feature that old houses ought to have. It looked almost like a castle, one from a movie. I almost expected a fire-breathing dragon to walk out of it, either that, or a window to open up on its own, sucking us in. Neither of these things happened.  
Instead, we flew into a turret on the seventh story. The room inside was large, decorated sparsely in black. In fact, the only things in the room were a bed, a dresser, a desk, and a closet. Everything was organized with military precision. I felt almost afraid to touch anything, for fear of messing it up.  
I finally looked at Draco. He was standing in front of me, looking about a foot to my right. "Take off the cloak now, you're safe." I took off the invisibility cloak, grinning at Draco, who was surprised that I was not where he had thought I was.  
"Okay, I hate to do his, but I have to leave you here. I'll be going down to dinner, and I'll bring you up some food. Until I come back, though, you will have to stay in the closet. I'll leave you a candle and a few of my first year magic books if you want to get a start on your learning." At my blank look, he explained himself. "If I'm going to take you to Hogwarts, I want you to know enough to pick up where you should at your age. You will be going into seventh year with me. You might want to start working." As he talked, Draco got me the things he had promised. When he was finished talking, he left the room, leaving me alone.  
"Do not, under any circumstances, leave that closet until I come in to get you. I don't care what you hear in this room. You must stay put." He added as he closed the door. I climbed into the closet, making myself comfortable among the robes and outfits in the large closet.  
I looked at the candle in the very dim light of the closet. I supposed I was supposed to know how to light it without any matches, but I didn't. I pulled out my wand. Shrugging, I said the word that the people in Harry Potter did when they wanted to start a fire. "_Incendio_," I whispered. I felt the power of my wand, but it didn't work. I tried another approach. I, as I did in Wiccan workings, concentrated on the flame, visualizing the fire starting as I cupped my hands around the candle. To my great surprise, it worked.   
_Hmm_, I thought, _I can make a candle light itself, I can make the wind hold me up, I wonder what else I can do. Maybe I should test some stuff out... _Then I reconsidered. It might be a bad idea to start playing with forces I don't understand while trapped in a closet. I decided to keep my playing around for another time. Instead, I opened up the first book in the stack Draco had given me. Sighing, I got to work.


	4. Life goes on and the Diagon Alley Riots

**************************************************************

Arnica

***************************************************************

__

It's a road. A long road and I think it's near us. Me. ME? Who am I? I'm not. Not anything. But there is a road  
::west::  
and there's a woman and a large black dog. They're standing there, waiting. A truck comes up along the road. An orange truck. Rusty and almost falling apart. It pulls over and they crawl into the back.  
::where you heading::  
::London::  
:: jump in::  


" Arnica!" Sirius shakes me and my teeth click together as my head snaps forward. My neck and my back ache. My head hurts. My hearing is getting clearer and clearer but my vision is coming back slowly. Right now Sirius is just a silhouette, but the shadows are lightening and in a moment I can see the beginnings of his face.  


" It hurts." I whimper. He eases me up some so that I'm resting against him and wipes my forehead with a wet hand.  


__

:: there's a road with a woman and a large black dog::  


" Are you okay? What happened?" He sounds a bit frantic as he loosens the robe around me.  


" There's a road. To the west of us." I whisper. " I'm not sure how far, but when we get to the road, we need to wait. An orange pick-up is going to give us a lift into London."  


" What..." He looks down at me and my vision is back, it's just night. " What are you talking about."  


" I...saw us. We were standing beside a road and a truck's gonna pick us up and take us to London."  


" You have visions?!" Sirius asks  


" I do now. Owwwie." I try to sit up and the world kinda spins around me, so I close my eyes and try again. Better. Not by much, but better.  


" I've never heard of a diviner suffering pain from a vision." He says, helping me up. I know what that is. It's the closest I'll get to an apology for his assumption that I lied about not being who I said I was. I accept it by letting him bodily pick me up and set me on my feet.  
" It hurts because I'm not from here. I could do the magic because I saw you do it so many times and I lost my lighter..." My voice cracks. " I lost my lighter! I'm never going to find my friends and I can't have a smoke and Zoe gave me that lighter when we were hanging out right after we graduated and I want my friends!" Sirius hugs me. " You don't get it!" I pound at his shoulder for not being able to understand. " I don't have my music or my lighter anymore and they're all I had left and what if something bad happened?! You don't understand! You don't know Aradia and Zoe and Sarai! What if they landed in the woods too? What if no one found them!? They can't take care of themselves!" A month's worth of worries and fears are all spilling over and all over a lighter and dead batteries. " And we weren't there for Sarai's birthday and she turned eighteen all by herself and I lost my lighter and now I'll never find them again!"  


" First off, you didn't lose your lighter. Luminos." He holds up his wand and reaches in the pocket of the robe, pulling out my little light blue lighter with the bright orange tropical fish on it. I gratefully take it, cradling it in my hands and hurriedly stick my last cigarette in my mouth, lighting it and taking a deep breath. I offer it to Sirius who takes a long drag as well before passing it back. Puff, puff give, puff, puff give. It's a pot rotation and he's good at this. I   
bet Sirius was a real pothead when he was younger. Come to think of it, a joint wouldn't be a bad thing right now. Boy Sarai would be so angry if she heard me say that, but then again, Sarai isn't here right now and neither is a joint, a stuttering ginger-ale and some Cool Ranch Doritos so it's a moot point. 

" And second of all, I can fix your machine so that it doesn't need those batteries to run." I look at him, hopefully, almost forgetting to take a drag. Almost. I would never forget to smoke. I hand him the butt and let him finish it off. " What is it anyway?"  


" A cd player. I've got my entire computer's music data base in my cd book as well as my regular cd's. I just put the disc in, press play and get the music."  


" I know what a cd player is," Sirius scoffs " I just hadn't seen a disc man when I went...away." He says, flipping my machine over and looking at it for a while before casting a charm on it. " Try it now." I put the headphones back on my ears and press play and Ani comes rushing through to me and the ground is not so soft and I can breath easy again. " So there's a road to the west of here. Do you want to start walking in the morning?"  


" I want to start walking now." I say with conviction. " I don't know when that truck will pass by, but the sooner we get to London, the sooner we start walking to Hogwarts. I mean, it's already to 23rd and the train leaves in eight days. We're never gonna make it if we miss that ride."  


" Okay," Sirius hands me my bag. " But before we go anywhere," He smirks at me. " I need my robes back."  


It's almost eight when I stumble out towards the road, Padfoot at my side. I rest my hand on his shaggy head to steady myself. I haven't slept enough, ate enough, done anything like I should for a close to a month and a half. I'm tired. I simply want to curl up here, safe from the woods and sleep myself away from here and back home. Somehow, I can't see that happening though. Beside me, Padfoot makes a reassuring doggy noise and licks my hand. Taking a deep breath, I begin scanning the road.  


I would have missed it. I think I've fallen asleep standing up, eyes open and all. Thank all Padfoot barks and snaps me out of it as the pickup crests the hill. I stick out my thumb and the truck stops by me. Just like in the vision. An old man, weather worn, every laugh and tear etched into his face, leans out the window, looking at me in concern.  


" Where you heading?" He asks in concern.   


" London." I try to brush my tangled, curled, dreaded hair out of my face. He smiles and gestures to the back of the truck.  


" Jump in." I go around back and undo the tailgate, jumping in after the dog and closing the tail gate back. Sliding in the back between crates of vegetables, I lean back against Padfoot as the truck begins to rattle along and fall blissfully asleep.  


" London." I sit up suddenly as the old man tells me where we are, looking around at the bustling city. Beside me, Padfoot lets out an excited bark and I groggily climb out of the truck bed.  


" Thank you so much." I say, stifling a yawn. The man smiles and hands me a bill. I'm not sure how much it is, but I'm sure it's at least enough to get Sirius and I a hamburger.  


" I know a girl who's looking for something when I see her. Good luck." He offers, climbing back into his truck and driving away.  


" Come on Sirius." I say, heading off towards a Burger King on the corner. " Let's get some food and then we can get you all disguised and human again."  


Twenty minutes later I'm stumbling tiredly across the threshold of the three broomsticks with a tall green eyed, brown haired man who goes over to the man cleaning glasses and returns with a key. I don't really remember anything other than how soft a bed can really be as I sink down, dirt and sweat and clothes and all.  


It's two days later when I finally wake up curled around Sirius in the middle of a soft white bed. My head is foggy as I sit up slowly, squinting into the morning light. Beside me Sirius sits bolt upright, looking wildly around. I grin sleepily at him.

" I'm gonna take a bath." Mmmm, a bath. A chance to actually wear underwear again. Underwear. I need underwear to wear them. I need clean clothes before I soak myself " Um, after I get some new clothes." Right now the best we can do is spell our clothes clean and shower, but Sirius does shave, grinning as I settle myself on the rim of the tub to watch in interest.

" What is it about a man shaving that's so interesting?" He asks, carefully shaving the underside of his chin.

" Dunno. Probably the fact that men tend to do it right out of the shower so you're clean, you smell good and best of all, you're only wearing a towel when you do it." He grins at me. " Plus that look of intense concentration is so cute." His grin turns into a mock scowl. 

" Puppy, kittens and children are cute. Sirius Black is not cute." He gives me an exaggerated psudo-evil look. And I giggle through a really big yawn. " Still tired?"

" Exhausted." He rinses his face and helps me up, holding my arm as I wobble a little. Damn this spinning bathroom!

" You look it. Come on. We need to change your money, pick up a few things for you, and then if you think you can behave yourself, we can spend the next week in bed." I grin at him.

" No promises, but let's get this disguise on you and we'll see." Sirius and I reapply his disguise and grab my bag before stumbling out into the light of Diagon alley and down to Gringotts, letting Sirius exchange my money. All six hundred and thirty five dollars of it. It had been six fifty, but you'd cry if you knew how expensive a few packs and some soda is in Maine.  


" Come on." He leads me out of the bank and for once he looks calm inside and out. He's where he belongs again. We head down through the streets and to a musty shop filled with shoe boxes.  


" I don't need new shoes." I say confused. Sirius laughs.  


" This is Ollivander's." He says softly. " If you can use my wand, then you need your own." And then there's a strange and energetic little man bouncing around the shop, measuring me and pulling down boxes. He reminds me of my old manager at the job I'm positive I don't have anymore. This long limbed bundle of movement, speaking rapidly and randomly sticking wands into my hand. I'm to dazed to pay attention, but I do see Sirius' brows knit in thought at something as the small man with the long limbs hands me another wand that works. Ebony with a mixed core. the heartstring of a hyberian and an opal eye. I'm kinda not surprised my wand is all dragon. I let Sirius pay and mutter a thank you. I guess two days really wasn't enough time to sleep.  


" What are you thinking about?" I ask. Sirius looks over at me and I must really be tired because his hair looks darker and his eyes less green, but that can't be true because the spell lasts for close to five hours at a time and we haven't been gone that long. We can't have been...  


" Ollivander. He said you're the fourth girl he's fitted that had to take a special wand." The fog that's been wrapping itself around my brain since I fell asleep in the truck lifts for the first time.  


" Three others! Do you think...maybe.." I'm breathless with the thought. Sarai, Aradia, Zoe...here in Diagon alley somewhere...maybe even now!  


" That's what I was thinking. I can't think of him having to specially make wands for regular witches, but since you four aren't even from this world, it's probably your friends!" He whispers. I'm so excited that I don't even register that Sirius said Ollivander had to go in the back and make my wand right there.  


" Can we start looking now?" I whip my head around, looking through the crowds. I don't see anything, but apparently Sirius does. His eyes practically light up. " What?"  


" It's Harry." And I follow his eyes and there's a tall black haired youth lounging against the outside wall of the robes shop, but there's no way that that could possibly be Harry Potter because in the books he's just a kid and the boy over there is close to my age. For him to still be in school this would have to be...my stomach falls.  


" Sirius.." I turn, but he's already gone, making his way over towards Harry. " We've fallen into the seventh year." I whisper to no one in particular. " We've fallen into the last battle." I numbly make my way over to the side of a building and stare at the ground, thinking about what I knew about what would happen in the last book. All I really knew was that Voldemort would finally attack Hogwarts itself and that there was no promises made that Harry survived.  


" Arnica!" Sirius is beside me again. " I just talked to Harry and he said that..."  


" Oh my god!!!!" We both turn around to see a woman pointing and screaming. " It's Sirius Black! Call the aurors!" And I look up for the first time and it really is Sirius staring down at me, long black hair and dark black eyes.  


" Shit! Sirius! Run!" I hiss as people begin panicking, rioting in the middle of the street. He looks at me desperately before apperating away, leaving me to dash away from the crowd that's swelling and pushing worse than any mosh pit I've been in. Someone's bag catches me across the face and I fall to the ground, feet trampling over my legs and even my back before a strong hand grabs me, hauling me upwards by the strap of my bag, pulling me into a small alleyway. I look over to see a young man about my own age, his strawberry blonde air darker on one side near his temple, a smear of blood trickling down his face. I guess he must have caught a blow too.  


" You okay?" He asks in a thick Irish accent. I shake my head and sit down by his feet. I've lost Sirius and whatever he'd discovered. I've completely lost my way. He frowns and kneels down by me. " Here, my name's Seamus Finnegan. Do you need help?" I look up at him hopefully.  


" It depends." I bite my lip. " Do you think you can get me on the Hogwarts express?"

******************************************************************

Zoe

******************************************************************

When I wake up, I'm alone in the room. I hear the shower running, and settle down into my blankets, staring out the window.  


"Shit," a voice comes from the shower. More cursing ensues. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!!"  


Oh, God, I think, jumping out of bed and running to the bathroom door. What did he do? How much damage can you do in the shower? Unless... I giggle. No. This is not American Pie II. Remus is not that crazy kid with the super glue.  


"What's wrong?" I call through the door. There is a pause.  


"Shit," he says again.  


"Shit what?" I ask peevishly. "What shit?"  


"Nothing," he mutters, barely audible above the rushing water. "I just ran out of soap."  


I laugh. "If that's all..." I run to my backpack and pull out some soap I'd bought a earlier that summer at a tourist trap in Boothbay Harbor. Lupine, the label says. Yeah, right. For a buck? At least it smells good. That is why I brought it on this trip.  


I quickly unwrap the soap before knocking on the bathroom door. "Uh... Remus? Can I come in? I have soap."  


"Sure, the curtain's not see through."  


"Good." I open the door, and a blast of steam hits me in the face. I close my eyes and make my way over to the shower. "Here you go." Eyes still tightly shut, I stick my arm through the shower curtain and drop the soap into Remus' waiting hands.  


"Thanks," he calls, as I make my way to the door.  


"Don't mention it." I grab the handle, and am halfway out the door before I hear loud screams and an amount of cursing that exceeds even Arnica's foul mouth. I turn, just in time to see a very naked Remus Lupin jump out of the shower, clawing at an angry red patch on his right arm.  


"Shit, Zoë!" he yells. "What the hell was in that soap?"  


"Uh... Let me think..." I make a big show of thinking hard about Remus' question. "Soap! Jesus H. Christ on a sidecar, Remus! D'you think I wanted you to scrub down with acid? It's Lupine scented soap!"  


Remus stops rubbing his arm and stares at me. "L- lupine?"  


"Yes, it's a flower. It smells pretty," I say stubbornly.  


"I know." Despite his obviously painful rash, Remus looks amused. "It also happens to be highly repellent to... Well, let's just say it gives me a nasty rash."  


I look back at him stupidly. Then, realization dawns over me. I slam a palm against my forehead. "Oh, shit," I mutter. "It's a werewolf thing. Lupine must be a werewolf repellent. Jesus, Remus. I'm sorry."  


Now it's Remus' turn to stare stupidly. "How could you... You're a muggle. You're not supposed to know about me, er, about werewolves."  


I flush. Arnica, Sarai, and Aradia would be looking at the roots of my hair to see how red I am. "Uh... You see, that's kind of a funny story, well, novel actually, and I don't really know..."  


Remus' brow furrows as he tries to make sense of my flustered mumbling. "Why don't you just tell me?"  


And I do. I tell him all about the Harry Potter books, how all of their lives are laid out in seven books for our enjoyment, how only the first four are out, how they tell everything. Remus nods and asks questions, finding the whole thing fascinating. I'm calm until I reach the end, where I tell him how I got here.  


"And all we did was go to this cabin, and read this book, and I fell out of the sky at you, and I don't really know where I am, and I don't think I'm even in my world anymore, and I want my friends, and my car, and my mommy, and I just want to go home!"  


Remus looks at me with pity. "I believe you," he says simply. I sniff. _I will not cry in front of this man_. "Don't worry. We'll find your friends, and get you home. It'll be all right."  


I sniff again. _I will not cry. I will not cry. I will not.._. Ah, hell. I'm crying. Remus moves closer to me and puts an arm over my shoulders. I turn to him, lean my head against his chest and start to sob. I cry for my friends, for my family, who I'm sure will start to miss me soon, mostly for myself. I cry until I can't anymore, until there are no more tears left. Finally, I look up at Remus.  


"Sorry," I say, wiping my face.  


He shakes his head. "It's okay. That's a lot to absorb all at once. Are you going to be all right?"  


I nod, stepping away.  


"Good," he says, wiping my tears off his shoulder. I laugh. He smiles back at me. "Very good. 'Cause I'm still naked here, and starting to feel a little uncomfortable that we're both standing here with my nakedness uncovered."  


I laugh, blushing as he grabs a towel from the rack by the shower, and wraps it around his waist. He laughs at my blush. "And you said it didn't bother you."  


"Yeah," I blush harder. "About that... I told you I was gay?"  


He nods.  


"Damn. I haven't even come out to my folks yet. Um... Yeah. I was really tired last night. I think you should know that I don't randomly come out to strange people, so... Sorry."  


He shakes his head. "Don't worry about it. You didn't offend me."  


I nod. "Good. Well... You should get dressed. I should shower, that is, unless you want to finish up in there?" I grin at him.  


He shakes his head. "That's all right. You go ahead. We'll talk more when you get out."  


"Good enough." Grinning, I shove Remus out the door, and strip down so I can get clean.  
***

  
I walk down the street, whistling. I'm alone, but this doesn't bother me. Remus and I have discussed this, and decided that he has far more important things to do than baby-sit an eighteen year old, who is perfectly capable of looking after herself.  


I look around, curiously. Surrounding me are things I've never seen before in my life, things like wands, robes, potions, racing brooms; magical things that have never been seen in my entirely muggle world. I've been able to lose myself in it every day for the past week and a half. I know I'll find my friends, so I'm not terribly worried about that anymore, and if I still wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, well, that's none of your business. In any case, I have Remus. He'll figure something out. We'll meet up at Hogwarts, Dumbledore will tell us to click our heels together three times, and we'll be home. But while I'm here, I may as well do some shopping.  


So that's what I'm doing. I've had all my cash changed into wizard money, and I'm getting gifts for my friends, because I know I'll see them again soon.  


"Hey, honey." I look up at the familiar American accent to see two men standing in front of me. "This isn't exactly the safest place in town to go wandering by yourself, you know?"  


I look around. I seem to have found myself in a fairly empty part of Diagon Alley. In fact, there is no one in sight but these two men. I try to recall moisture to my rapidly drying mouth. "I, uh, I'll take that under advisement, thanks." I turn, ready to walk away from these two big men who are definitely freaking me out.  


"Hey," one of them catches me by the wrist. "Where are you going?"  


"I, I think I'll go find my, my dad now, thanks." I twist my wrist from the man's grasp and start walking, fast. I hear a sound of jogging boots behind me and know they're trying to catch up to me. "Fuck," I mutter. I drop all pretense of calm. Breaking into a full run, I sprint away and around a corner, hoping beyond hope that it will take me back to the main street of the Alley.  


Dead end. "Fuck." I turn around, facing my attackers. "Guys, we're all reasonable people here," I begin, smiling. "Let's think about this for a moment. I'm a teenager. I'm broke, you won't get much money from me, and face it, I know what you look like. If you leave me the hell alone, right now, we can pretend this didn't happen, and you can go terrorize someone else. Please."  


The one that had grabbed my arm laughs. "Honey, every little bit helps, and besides, a good Memory charm will make sure you forget everything that happens here."  


The other one pipes up. "C'mon, kid. Pull out your wallet, It'll make this a whole lot easier." I freeze (this can't be happening to me). "No? Fine, I guess we'll just have to take it." He laughs and reaches forward, making like he's going to grab me.  


"No!" I cry, throwing my hands up over my face and knocking his arm aside. "Leave me alone! Just leave me the fuck alone!" I back up so that my back's touching the wall, only my back isn't really touching the wall anymore, it's just my butt. I must be leaning forward a bit, but I can't really touch my back against the wall, even if I try, and I'm trying, because it makes me feel safer.  


The guys have stopped laughing. "Shit, Andy. What the fuck?" He's pointing at me.  


"I don't know, man. Let's leave her alone, this is freaking me out." He's backing away from me.  


"Too much Snitch. We're fucking seeing things."  


"Dude, let's get out of here." The two back slowly away from me before turning and running out of the alley, still swearing.  
__

It's nice to hear some American swearing, I muse, still in shock a little. I start walking back to the Leaky Cauldron. _Even if they did try to mug me. Enough with all these "bloody hell" this, and "ruddy" that. It's nice to hear some real, solid fucks._  


I'm almost back, when I start to hear the screams. I turn, and a woman, a very tall woman, is pointing at me, screaming, and shielding a young child from my view. More people take up her shrieks, and some start throwing rocks at me. One man points his wand at me, and shouts a word that sounds a lot like "_Stupefy!_"  


"Shit," I mutter, only it sounds more like a growl. I don't even think. I dodge the stream of light that's pouring out of the guy's wand, and start running. I run straight into the Leaky Cauldron, and lope up the stairs, before charging through the unlatched door.  


"Remus!" I yell, and now I know something's wrong. My voice sounds all funny, like it's not even a voice, and everything around me is taller, like my head is only at what I'm sure is waist level. Did somebody shrink me? "Shit, Remus! I need help!"  


My guardian emerges from the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist. Apparently, my roommate really likes showers. He jumps about a foot into the air when he sees me, and whips out his wand. Where he managed to store that thing, I don't know, nor do I care. My eyes are trained on the point of his wand as I back slowly away. 

"Remus?" I ask cautiously.  


His wand point stays aimed at me, but a funny look comes into his eyes. His squints at me a little. "Zoë?" he asks. "Is that you?"  


"Of course it's me. Who else would it be? C'mon, Remus..." I trail off. It's clear from his expression that he can't understand me.  
"Are you stuck?" He asks. "Of course you're stuck, otherwise you would have transfigured back so you could talk to me." I stare blankly back at him. "Let's see, how does that one go again? Ah, yes. _Reddio!_" Sparks pour out of his wand, and I'm tall again.  


I run over to Remus and give him a huge hug. "Thank you so much, Remus! What happened to me? Why was I short?" Remus stop laughing. "What happened?"  


He is laughing at me. "Zoë," he's trying to smother his humor, but it isn't working. "You transfigured yourself into a big mountain lion. No wonder there were screams outside! How did you manage to do that without a wand?"  


"I didn't."  


"Yes you did." He looks at me curiously. "Think about it, Zoë. A big cat walked into my hotel room. I could have stunned you, you know. If it weren't for the bandanna markings over your head I would have. I almost didn't recognize you. Really, though. How did you do it?"  


"I. Did. Not. Do. Anything."  


He shakes his head. "Zoë, you're a witch. How could you not have known?"  


"Look, Remus," I begin testily. "I'm not a witch. I don't know anything about wizardry. I've never held a wand, and until a few days ago, I didn't even think they existed. This stuff isn't real in my world, people imagine it. The only people who believe it are the crazy people who sit in cardboard boxes on corners and mutter that the end is near. I'm not crazy, and I'm not a witch."  


"I don't know what goes on in your world," Remus replies, pushing his bangs out of his face in irritation. "But in this world, magic's real, and you can do it. If you don't believe me, that's fine. But I'm going to take you somewhere to prove that it's true."  


"Fine," I say, thrusting my chin forward stubbornly.  


Remus nods. "Good. Bring your money, you're going to need it."  


I grab the denim purse I'd sewn during my senior year, and follow Remus out the door, through the common room, out onto the street, and into a shop filled with what looks like a bunch of shoe boxes.  


"Shoes, Remus? Shoes are going to prove to me that I'm a witch?"  


"Not shoes," he replies distractedly. "Mr. Ollivander? Are you in here?"  


"Hello." A voice startles me, and I jump, turning to see the source of my fright. An oldish man with silvery eyes stands at my elbow, looking up at me expectantly. "Here for a wand? What happened to your old one." He looks at me shrewdly. "I hope you cared for it properly. You didn't break it?"  


"Err... No. I guess I'm a first time customer." I glance over at Remus. This is what he had in mind? He's going to prove that I'm a witch by using Mr. Ollivander? I hope the disappointment for this little man isn't too great.  


He nods. "This is Zoë Shields. She needs to be fitted for a wand."  


"I see." Mr. Ollivander draws a measuring tape out of the air, and begins to measure me. "Which is your wand hand?" I hold out my right arm, allowing the tape to measure the length around my bicep. "Your right? And how old are you?"  


"Eighteen..." The tape whips around my waist, my head, and pauses there to measure the space between my eyes.  


"Aha." The man scans a few boxes on the top shelf, pulling a few down and setting them upon a spindly chair in the center of the room.  


"Hey!" I yell, slapping the tape away from my chest. "I think you're done there," I order it. "And don't let me catch you doing that again!" The tape inches meekly away and curls up by Mr. Ollivander's feet.  


"I have a few wands for you to try," the man gestures to the pile of boxes on the chair as Remus looks on in amusement. Ollivander begins pulling out wands and thrusting them into my hand. "Yew with unicorn hair. No? How about willow with a Pegasus feather? Still no? Don't worry, we'll find something. Try this, willow with dragon heartstring..." The pile of incompatible wands grows higher and higher, and I begin to fear that I'm right, and Remus is wrong.  


Mr. Ollivander pushes one hand through his white hair, an exasperated look in his silver eyes. "I've got one thought, before I must declare you a hopeless muggle, my dear. If you'll excuse me for a moment." He rushes to the back of the store and out of sight.  


"I told you, Remus." I say, looking over at him. "Even Ollivander's going to declare me a hopeless muggle. I'm nothing special, and certainly not magical."  


"Let's just wait for Ollivander to get back before we decide that," is Remus' calm reply.  


The little wand maker emerges from the back room, carrying one more box under his arm. "I think this should do the trick. If it doesn't I don't know what will." He opens the box and removes a magnificent wand made of a silvery-white wood. He holds the wand out of my reach for a moment to explain it's make-up to me. "It's ten and a half inches, silver willow. It contains two cores - a single hair from the head of a sphinx, and another from the tail of a werewolf at full moon. I had to make it specially for you. I do hope it works." He looks at me a little anxiously as I take the wand into my hand.  


Immediately, the wand takes over my body. My arm reaches into the air, and a stream of sparks shoots from the wand's tip.  


"Oh, very good!" Ollivander claps his hands with joy. "I wouldn't know who else to sell it to. I'm so glad it fits." The little man smiles at me, and his silvery eyes light up with glee.  


"Thank you Mr. Ollivander." I reach into my purse, pointedly ignoring Remus' smug look. "What do I owe you?"  


In a few weeks, I kind of get used to the idea of me being a witch. Remus helps me, teaches me a few spells, and kind of sets me free to wander about by myself again. It's more fun now. I'm not worrying about any thugs jumping me anymore, because Remus taught me a few spells of self defense. Really nice of him, I think. He's even helping me control that nasty habit I have of randomly transforming into animals and inanimate objects. It's been happening more and more often since that first time. Once, during dinner, my head transfigured itself into a TV. Then, I had to explain to Remus what a TV is, and how it works. Then I had to explain the Playboy channel. No! I don't know why it turned to that! What a nightmare. Anyway, it's mostly under control now. And I can usually control the weird transfiguration attacks I still have. On the whole, life is looking good.  


Humming, I walk into the hotel room I still share with Remus (business still hasn't eased up. If anything, it's gotten busier), and stop dead. The room is, well, it's bare. Remus' trunk is opened at the foot of his bed, and he's stuffing the last of his clothes into it.  


He looks up at me. "Zoë. Good, I'm glad you're back. We'll be leaving tomorrow morning, so you'll need to pack up tonight." He must see my shocked expression, because he pauses, then asks "Are you all right?"  


"I'm fine," I say, blinking at him through my surprise. "I just thought I'd have more warning. Tomorrow? Where are we going?"  


"Hogwarts. I'm teaching there this year, so I have to be there a bit earlier than the students, about a month earlier."  


"Oh." I pull my backpack out from under my bed and start tossing clothes into it. "Hogwarts it is. Good thing I have no luggage."  


I pack quickly, then Remus and I have some dinner. I try to get him to tell me more about this mysterious boyfriend of his, but he stays pretty tight lipped. All I manage to find out is that it's been awhile since he's seen the guy, but he's still crazy about him. He tries to get me to talk about _my_ mysterious ex-boyfriend, but I don't say much either. I'm done being a vindictive and evil bitch about him, so I just don't talk. If you can't say something nice...  


We turn in early, as Remus hopes to leave early. In the morning, we both sleep late, and Remus swears when we wake up. We rush through our morning rituals, and are both ready by noon.  
  
"How are we getting there, Remus?" I ask, backpack slung over my shoulder.  


He points at a pen he'd left on his dresser. "I bewitched that to be a portkey. All we have to do is grab on."  


"Sure thing." I shrug, glancing over at him. "I'm ready when you are."  


He nods. "This will feel a little funny, so just hold on."  


I gulp, and we grab hold of the pen. A hook grabs me from behind my navel and yanks me forward towards Remus. I almost stumble, but I can't really move my feet. I think I'm going to be sick, but I can't move myself enough to heave. All in all, I'm really quite glad when we reach Hogwarts.  


We arrive in the entrance hall. I look around, eyes wider than they've ever been. I can't believe I'm really seeing this. I've only ever imagined it, and it's so unreal to actually be here.  


I'm almost spinning, but I stop when I see a tall man in purple robes. He's thin, but not overly so, and obviously quite old, judging by the long silver hair and beard. Dumbledore. This can only be Dumbledore. I'm so relieved I could cry. He's here. The man who's going to solve my problems, find my friends and send me home.  


He smiles at us. "Hello, Remus. Hello, Zoë. Would the two of you like to come in for some lunch?"  


I've never been so happy in my life.  


*****************************************************************

Aradia

*****************************************************************

I groan as I feel the small house-elf shake me awake It is only four o'clock in the morning, and it's already time for me to be up. I look over at Draco, sleeping next to me on the bed. Before I can get up, I have to pull his arm from around my waist. He wakes up as I do this.  


"What's going on?" He slurs, still mostly asleep. "Where's the fire?" I smile down at him.  


"Go back to bed, Draco. I just have to go back to my room in case Lucius decides to check on you... Or me." Draco nods as he falls back asleep. I doubt he will remember when he really wakes up that we even talked. I quietly move down the hall, finally arriving at the Green room. This was the room Lucius assigned to me when he first discovered that I was here.  


A lot had happened over the summer. It almost seems like no time has gone by, and it should be June first again. But it's not. It's August 22 and we'll be school shopping this afternoon.   


Like I said, a lot happened over the summer. And it all started on the first night.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"There is no way I'm going to sleep on the floor!" I was so angry with Draco that I forgot to keep my voice down. He clamped a hand over my mouth, quieting me. I repeated myself, much quieter this time. "Well, I won't. I just spent five hours locked in a tiny closet space, which, by the way, is the worst place in the world for a claustrophobic. I was trying to learn all this magic stuff, which, by the way I don't get. It's way too different from the magic I'm used to, and I know that it can't work! I just got separated from my whole family and all of my friends. I'm stuck in a demented fan-fiction, and I want to go home! I want to see Sarai and Arnica and, of course, Zoë, right now." I knew I was babbling, but I had a right, didn't I? "And to top it all off, you want me to sleep on a cold, hard floor with only one blanket and one pillow, and all I have to say right now is: no fucking way." Draco looked at me, surprised. The pillow and blanket he had been holding dropped to the bed unnoticed. I blinked away the tears I had been about to shed, concentrating on not letting this evil git see me cry.  


"Well, what did you expect? Did you think that I would give up my bed for the entire summer?" His raised eyebrow was mocking, and I wondered why I had always stuck up for him so hard for my friends.  


"No, of course not! My thought was that this is a big bed. We can share. I don't care what you say, I'm going to sleep on this bed, and I won't let you sleep on your floor, so my suggestion is to pick a side before I do it for you." Draco stared at me, mouth hanging open. For once, he had no comeback.  


"Fine, if you won't, then I will." I went over to the bed and threw my stuff on the right side. "I'm going to go and get ready for bed. I'll be out in a minute." I grabbed my nightgown, wishing for the first time that I had packed different clothes. I strolled into the bathroom, leaving a stunned and speechless Draco behind. I looked at myself in the mirror for the first time since I had landed in this world.  


My curly auburn hair was a little tangled, but not much. I grinned slightly as I thought about the day that my friends and I had dyed my hair and permed it. I continued looking, not wanting to think about my friends and how much I missed them. My cheeks were flushed; a sign that I'd almost lost it, thinking about my friends. There I go again. My skirt flowed down to my ankles. It had always been my favorite, a lucky Wal-mart purchase I had made with my Mom. My black halter-top showed off the results of the dieting I had done in my senior year. I was thin now, and my chest was still a pretty good size, something that my mother hated me for.  


I look into my eyes. The eyes, after all, are a window to the soul. The hazel eyes stared back at me, filled with unshed tears. I looked like a damsel in distress. A true Renaissance maiden. I almost laughed at the sight, but instead, I started to get undressed. I looked at my nightgown, feeling a little squeamish about wearing it in front of a strange boy.  


I had bought the thing in freshman year at school. At the time, I had a sort of problem with wearing much clothing to bed. Usually I went without. But then I had seen this. It was a very, very short, very, very low cut, and very, very revealing wine-colored velvety lingerie. I loved it, and had started wearing it again after senior year. I had brought it because I was just going to be hanging with friends. But now, I was really uncomfortable, wearing it in front of a strange guy.  


If Arnica were here, she would be telling me that there was no way that Draco would be able to keep his hands off me if I wore it. But, since I had nothing else, I donned the garment and prepared to walk into the bedroom.  


Before I could leave the room, I looked in the mirror again. I no longer looked like the medieval damsel; I looked witchy. I had the curly red hair, the seductive clothing, and, of course, the pentacle. I would have loved it if I hadn't been so worried about the scene to come.  


After a few minutes, I decided that I just wasn't going to leave the bathroom. I heard Draco pounding softly on the door. I tried to ignore it.  


"Come on, Aradia, I need to get in there. You can't stay in there forever." Draco whispered at me through the door. "I need to get in there!"  


I glared at the direction of the door. "Draco, I don't care, you can pee out the window, I'm not coming out of here. Go away!" There was a brief pause from Draco.  


"Are you dressed?" I looked at my outfit again skeptically   


"Um, well, sort of, not really, but, um, yeah, I guess..." There was silence from the other side of the door. After a few seconds, I heard Draco, it seemed, talking to the door.  


"Alohomora!" The door swung open. I looked at Draco, and he blinked, his face coloring. "Sort of dressed?" I nodded. "Yeah, got it." He walked away, towards his room. I slipped out of the bathroom and went over to his bed. He walked into the bathroom and shut the door, very fast.  


I dropped my bag onto the floor beside the bad and climbed in. I pulled the covers up to my chin as Draco came back out into the bedroom.  


"What are you doing?" Draco looked at me, lying in his bed, confused.   


"I'm getting ready to go to sleep. Remember, we decided that we would sleep on the bed together" Draco looked at me, his face in a careful sneer.  


"Of course I remember that. How stupid do you think I am?" I decided not to answer, but my grin told Draco what my comment would have been. "I was just going to say that you're on my side of the bed, and that's my pillow."  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


That night was one of the worst nights of my life. I'm a light sleeper, and it doesn't help if the person you're sharing a bed with is a cover hog. For hours, I tried to keep the covers over me, while also trying to keep my nightgown covering my butt, and trying to sleep at the same time.  


It also didn't help that Draco got a little, well, frisky in his sleep. Now, I can understand something like that happening once, even twice, but Draco's hand just kept gravitating towards my ass. The first time, it was kind of funny. I just moved it, pushing Draco back. The second time, it was a little annoying. But I could deal with it. The third time, I had to check to see if he was awake. He wasn't, so I forgave him, pushing him back once more. The fourth time, well, he wasn't actually asleep. I turned to look at him, and his eyes were open, he was grinning. What else could I do? I bitch-slapped him. 

Well, at least he stopped grinning...  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"Look, Draco! I got it!" Draco looked over at me as I cried out in joy. I had been studying for days now, and this was the first time that I had managed to make something happen with my wand. I looked at the needle in front of me. It looked shiny and new. Who would have guessed that a minute ago it had been a match?  


"That's great Aradia!" He grinned down at me. "It took the rest of us about the same amount of time, and we were being lectured by McGonagall Good job. Now, let's move on."  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"Come on, Aradia, you know that! It's easy!" It was hard to concentrate sometimes with Draco hanging over my shoulder, criticizing me. The only good thing it did was to make me not want to make a mistake.  


"I know I know it, Draco, but I can't remember right now. If you would please be quiet and let me think, I might be able to do this." I added through gritted teeth. He really was infuriating sometimes. I could feel his eyes boring into me.  


"If you ever dared to talk back to a teacher the way you do to me, you would get points off your house. You need to learn how to deal with this. You won't do well if you take this kind of thing personally. Now, concentrate!" He continued yelling at me as I figured out the rest of the problem.  


It had been about a month, and I was actually ahead of schedule. I was working on the material that they had covered in the middle of the third year. I had tow and a half years left to cover, and I had another month to do it. I guess that studying a lot really does help. Too bad I hadn't realized that in my junior year...  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"Okay, Aradia, that's it for tonight. You can close your books." I looked at Draco, surprised. It was only midnight, and he was ready to call it quits. Usually I had to beg and plead before I was allowed to go to bed.  


When I looked over at Draco, he looked, well, miserable. I had never seen him like this.  


"Draco, are you okay?" I walked over and sat next to him on the bed. He looked up at me as I did this.  


"Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be fine? After all, I have everything I could want, right?" I didn't completely understand, so I let him go on. "I have a rich family. I have all the money I could need. I'm smart- second in my class. I have a mother who, well, stays out of my life. I have a father who wants the best for me..." He shook his head.  


"Who am I kidding? My father may be rich, but he's a death eater, and he wants me to be one too. I don't want to be evil. In fact, I kind of want to work for the good side. My biggest enemy is Harry Potter. I don't really want to be his enemy anymore, but I don't think I can stop. That makes my life a living hell, because I'm the only one who seems to hate him. My best friends are idiots named Crabbe and Goyle. They couldn't come up with a coherent sentence with a script. I've never had a girlfriend. The closest I've come is a doting idiot named Pansy Parkinson. I'm lonely." He sighed, but went on.  


"And to top it all off, my family sucks. My mother is a trophy wife to my father. She hasn't really been alive since she got married. My father is an ass. He thinks that he can get anything he wants from anyone. And he can. He does it by intimidation and by his money... Oh, yeah, and he also beats the shit out of his family if we dare to say so." Draco gave a short, unbalanced laugh. "Oh well, that's life, right? No big deal."  


I couldn't think of what else to do, so I put my arms around Draco, trying to comfort him. He collapsed into my arms, crying. I smiled a little in spite of myself. I have always thought that it was incredibly sexy to see a man cry. I rocked Draco a little, soothing him.  


"It'll be okay, Draco. We only have a few more weeks, and then we're out of this place for the year. Just think about that, and you'll feel a little better. And you have me. I won't abandon you, or hurt you, or anything like that. You're safe now." Draco lifted his head, looking at me. He didn't move away from me, I was glad to note.  


"I'm sorry. I don't mean to unload on you like this. It's just that, well, never mind." He sighed. "I don't mean to drag you down." I looked at him.  


"You're not dragging me down, Draco. I really do understand that everyone needs a chance to vent. It's really okay." He looked at me derisively. "Actually, you're making me feel better about my own life. Hearing yours, it doesn't seem so bad." I laughed slightly.  


"That's where you're wrong. Aradia. Your problems are just different than mine. They're not any less hard to take." I shook me head, blushing. I had always thought that my life really sucked, but it was nothing compared to this. Draco could tell I didn't believe him. "Really, tell me about your life. I'm sure you'll have had to deal with things I didn't have to." He waited. I guessed it was my turn.  


"Wow, I feel like I'm at DLI again. Okay... Um... This is hard... Okay. I was molested by my baby-sitter's son when I was four years old. That's been kind of a hard thing for me to deal with, because it's really ruined a lot of relationships I could have had. I'm so afraid it will happen again. My parents divorced when I was about 6. I've spent my life bouncing back and forth between my mother and my father. For the longest time, I felt like my mother hated me. Then we started to get along, really well. I started to, well, really not like my Dad. This really happened when he got married again. He no longer had any time for my sister and me. Instead, all he did was do things with his new wife and her daughters." I paused for a second. Draco smiled at me encouragingly. He wiped a tear from my face.  


"My mother also got married to someone with two children. That worked okay, except that my step-brother is a real ass-hole. One time, he pulled me out from underneath a desk by the neck. That was fun. He used to sit on his sister's head, and hold a pillow over it" And then, a couple years ago, he tried to run away. When we found him, he said that he wouldn't come home as long as my mother, my sister, and I were still living there. Things never got much worse, or much better, but then I graduated, and I was going to go to college, but I'm here. I guess that says it all." I looked at Draco. "See, it's not too bad. So, how about you? You told me what's going on now, but what about the rest of your life?"  


It was an amazing night. We talked all night. Well, actually, we fell asleep around four o'clock, right before the house-elf came in. She couldn't wake us up. Oops.  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"Well, well, well, what is this?" The sound of a harsh voice woke Draco and I up, immediately. "Something you wanted to tell me, Draco?" I looked into the deadly serious face of Lucius Malfoy.  


Draco, over his initial shock, smiled coldly. "I know you said to leave her alone, but she can be a merit to our cause. She isn't actually an American witch. She came here from, well, from another universe. In her world, magic does not exist. She does, however, have the talent. She's learned about four and a half years worth of magic, and she's only been here for six weeks." I saw Lucius' eyes flash at how long I'd been there.  


"As I said, I've been teaching her, and she's been learning it my way. She hasn't been poisoned by the ideas of Dumbledore's school. If we keep training her, she could be a great warrior for us." I knew Draco was just pretending to believe his words, but even I almost believed him.  


Lucius considered for a minute. "All right then. However, I will give her a new room, one a little further away from you than this. I will also hire the best tutors to teach her what she needs to know. This way, she will be assured the learning she needs." He looked at us sternly. "Now, go downstairs for breakfast." I started to leave with Draco, but I was stopped by Lucius.   


"Not you. I need to know your name, your age, and how close you've gotten to my son." I almost laughed at the silliness of the statement. But I didn't, because he was pretty scary.  


"My name is Aradia. I am 18 years old. And the closest I've gotten to your son is what you saw this morning. I sleep on his bed because I will not sleep on the floor. He's been teaching me magic, helping me with what I don't understand. And I pretty much live in his closet. That is where I study and spend my time. Is that good enough for you?"  


And it was.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"Okay. Done." The tutor looked over at me.  


"What do you mean, done?" I rolled my eyes. For a guy who was supposed to be brilliant, he really was dense sometimes.  


"I mean... Done, finis, I finished the assignment. Look, my desk is now a pig." He stared at me, amazed. I quickly did the spell to return it to desk shape. "There. I can do it. I'm done."  


"Well, I'm pleased to say that our little sessions are over. You have officially passed the sixth year. My services are no longer required." He quickly started to gather his teaching materials. "Good luck next year." With that, he apparated out of the room.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


I turned to look at Draco as I walked out of the room. He was sleeping peacefully. His head was buried in the spot that I had just left. I thanked the house-elf and started walking towards the door that would lead me to my room.  


"No, we don't sell that kind of wands..." I laughed out loud as Draco mumbled in his sleep. If I hadn't been so afraid of Lucius' wrath, I would have stayed and found out what kind of wands Draco doesn't sell.  


Instead, I returned to my room. I collapsed onto the bed and enjoyed my last few hours of sleep.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  


"Get up." I woke instantly to the sound of Lucius' voice. He threw me a robe to wear. "Wear this, and be down in the kitchen in fifteen minutes." The door slammed behind Lucius. I knew that he wasn't a morning person, so I didn't take offense to his brisk manner.  


I donned the robes, pulled a comb through my hair, and hurried down to the kitchen as I had been instructed. Everyone else was already there. Lucius and Narcissa stood in front of the table, inspecting Draco. They seemed to find nothing wrong, so they turned their scrutiny on me.   


"All right, I suppose you two will do." Lucius coldly looked us over one more time. "Something has come up, and I will be unable to accompany the two of you to Diagon Alley today. Draco, you have your list, buy two of everything on the list. One for you, one for Aradia." He handed Draco a bag of money. He then handed each of us another bag of gold. "This is for whatever you wish to buy. Do not spend it all, because if you do, there will be no more. Have a good time. Goodbye." He looked us one more time, and we left.  


"Well," drawled Draco, "This outing is getting better and better." He smirked. "Let's go."  


We climbed onto his broom and set off towards Diagon Alley. Remembering the last time, I held on tightly.  


As we rode, I thought of the summer. It had been both long and short. I had learned everything I needed to know for a seventh year at Hogwarts, and I had even developed my new elemental powers so I could call them up on will. I could jump off this broom, and I would float to the ground on the breeze. But I didn't. I stayed put, waiting to get there.  


Eventually, we did get there. Draco put his broomstick in a little hole in one of the walls of one of the shops. Then, the fun began.  


We must have gone through a dozen stores before Draco realized that I still had to get robes of my own. So, on we went to Madame Malkins robe shop. The woman in the shop was nice enough, but I couldn't help thinking about the last time I had stood up on a stool like this, being poked and prodded by a dressmaker. It had been before my sister's wedding, with my other sister...  


I saw Draco roll his eyes at the window. When I looked to see what he was sneering at, I saw a sea of red heads. And one guy with black hair. And one girl... I tried to run off the stool, tried to get out. Neither Madame Malkin or Draco would let me.  


"Aradia, stop it! What's wrong?" I looked frantically as I saw the mahogany-haired girl disappear in the crowd.  


"It was Sarai! My friend Sarai! And now she's gone! I could have seen my friend again, and now she's gone! I almost found her again..." I knew I was hysterical, but I didn't care.  


"Calm down, Aradia, really. You need to calm down. Relax. Finish your fitting, and then we'll find the Weasleys. They aren't too hard to miss." I relaxed a little. We'd be able to find them after my fitting. I relaxed and let the woman finish fitting me.  


It was not to be, though. We left the shop, and everything was perfect. We were walking down the street, and I felt eyes on me. I turned to look, and I saw Arnica, my Arnica, losing herself in the crowd with a dark, unkempt looking man.  


I sighed, I knew that I probably wouldn't find her again, but I had to try. I pulled Draco in the direction I had seen her. He tried to pull me back on his course, but I wouldn't be deterred this time.  


I tried to push my way through the throng; unfortunately, I would never find either of my friends. Instead, I found a riot.  


"Oh, my God!!!! It's Sirius Black!" Before I could do anything to go find my friends, Draco was pulling me away. He grabbed me around the waist and yanked me over to where he had hidden the broom. He pulled my on in front of him, and zoomed off. I was taken along with him, unwillingly. As we flew away, I saw the crowds pushing and shoving. I watched for some sign of my friends until they got so far away that all I saw was a solid spot, Diagon alley, and it was gone.

*****************************************************************  
Sarai, part 4  
*****************************************************************  


Have you ever noticed how when you decide to try and forget about something, it's suddenly the most persistent and obvious thing in the world and you can't possible ignore it, no matter how hard you try? And if you manage to ignore it for any amount of time, it will suddenly become glaringly obvious to you at the exact moment you don't want it to and then, of course, the entire moment is shot? Murphy's Law, I guess.  


After my birthday, it seemed as if every time I turned around- there was Ron. Not that that's so unusual- there are a lot of people in that house, and it's not as big as you might think. And it's not as if I hadn't seen him all the time before my birthday... I guess it's just that now I noticed him more. And that isn't necessarily a bad thing, either. It was just... distracting.  


Even considering the fact that every time Ron walked into the room, or we bumped into each other on the stairs- which are quite narrow and so happened quite often- I found myself ready to melt into a puddle right there in front of him, and was sure that my face was turning beet red, life in the Burrow didn't change much. Except for the fact that everyone suddenly seemed to realize that there were only a few weeks left of summer break before school, so the activities slowly began centering on schoolwork. Even I wound up spending one rainy Tuesday sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket and reading Ginny's old spell books. Which wasn't so bad, because Ron was sitting at the other end of the couch. And it was kind of impossible for both of us to be on the couch and not touch at least a little bit... Or so I told myself.  


Ginny and I were sitting on the back steps with our textbooks one afternoon, when Harry and Ron came out carrying their brooms. Ginny looked up from her Transfiguration book to glare at them. "Shouldn't you two be working on those essays you've been putting off?"  


Ron shrugged. "We still have about two weeks."  


Harry laughed at the look on Ginny's face. "Don't worry! We aren't going to risk giving Snape a reason to give us detention our first day back- we'll write the essays. Just later."  


Ginny rolled her eyes and I tried not to laugh. Ron nudged my knee with his foot. 

"You coming? We're just going up to the orchard for a bit."  


I smiled- shakily, I'm sure- but shook my head. "No." I held up the Potions book I'd been reading, which was as dry as toast and reminded me too much of Chemistry- which had been my least favorite class of all time. I'd hated it even more than my math classes, which is saying a lot. "I've got about six years to catch up on in two weeks, so I think I'll stay with Ginny."  


"All right," Harry said, grabbing Ron's arm and pulling him down the stairs. "See you later!"  


I turned back to my book, but I could feel Ginny watching me. I tried to ignore it, but after a few seconds, I glanced up at her, frowning. "What?"  


Ginny just smiled in an infuriating way. "Nothing," she answered slyly, opening her book.  


I glared at her- she was smiling in an I-know-something-you-don't-know kind of way. I set my book down on the steps and crossed my arms over my chest. "Okay, Ginny. Spill."  


"Spill what?" she asked innocently, still grinning madly.  


"You look like the Cheshire cat," I told her. "What are you grinning about?"  


She looked up at me, her brown eyes dancing. "Oh... nothing."  


"Ginny!"  


Ginny just shrugged and glanced back at her book.  


Angry, I turned away from her and watched Harry and Ron walk up the hill toward the orchard. Harry was laughing and Ron looked a bit bewildered, and they started arguing about something I couldn't hear. After a while, I looked back at Ginny, who was watching me and smiling even more widely- if I'd thought that possible.  


"What?"  


Ginny looked up the hill at Harry and Ron, then back at me. "You like my brother."  


"What?!"  


Ginny laughed, and I sat there staring at her with my mouth hanging open. "Ginny, what are you talking about?" I could feel my face and neck burning, but I was hoping that I could play dumb- I hadn't been *that* obvious- had I?  


She was still giggling when she finally answered. "Sarai, I'm not blind, you know. Besides, maybe I've only known you for about a month, but you've been acting really weird the past week or so. Especially when Ron's around. And I've known *him* my entire life, and he's been acting weird, too."  


I didn't know how to respond to this, but Ginny apparently didn't notice that I was gaping at her in shock, because she continued, "I think it's kind of funny, actually. You're both incredibly cute when you're flirting."  


I finally found my voice. "Flirting?! I haven't-"  


"Yes, you have," Ginny interrupted, rolling her eyes. "It's just that you've been doing it without realizing it."  


I rolled my eyes. "How do you flirt without realizing it?"  


Ginny just smiled at me- I was getting really tired of that smile. "Look, Ginny... Ron's... But I don't-"  


"Yes, you do," she interrupted again, standing and gathering her books. "But that's all right- you go ahead and be in denial," she told me, patting my head as she went into the house.  


"Ginny!" I called to her. "I am *not* in denial! Come back here!"  


She didn't, though, and I sat on the steps with my chin in my hands and scowled across the lawn. Maybe Ginny was just extra-perceptive. I'd been trying very hard *not* to act any differently, and I thought that with a few exceptions, I was doing well. Then again, if I thought about it, maybe I hadn't been as careful as I could have. But I didn't think he'd caught me looking at him, and it wasn't abnormal for us to touch if we were sitting next to each other... Was it? And what about what Ginny had said? *Did* Ron like me? Was that possible? Of course not! You're delusional and Ginny's on crack.  


I rubbed my temples with my fingertips, feeling a headache begin forming. I shook my head. I need to go home.  


We went to Diagon Alley for school supplies a week later, and I discovered- the hard way- that I did *not* enjoy traveling by Floo powder. Of course, I'm sure the trip to Gringotts minutes later didn't help at all. In any case, I spent the morning in a bit of a daze, feeling better- though still a bit queasy- after lunch. There's a reason I never ride anything more exciting than the Tilt-a-Whirl.  


After lunch, we split up. Mrs. Weasley had some errands to run, and so she let us go off on our own. We went to the apothecary, which I managed to stay in for about five minutes before beginning to feel queasy again and deciding to wait outside for the others. Finally, we had gone everywhere except Madam Malkin's and Ollivander's. As everyone needed new robes- and I didn't have any to begin with- we headed for the robe shop first. Just as we were about to go in, however, Ginny turned around and crossed her arms over her chest. "Let's come back later," she said, grabbing Harry's arm and beginning to propel him back toward the street.  


"Why? What's wrong?" Ron asked, looking past her into the shop.  


"Nothing!" she cried, grabbing his arm with her free hand. "I just think... maybe we should get Sarai's wand first! It's too crowded in there, anyway."  


"Wait!" Harry cried, pulling away and peering into the shop. "That's Malfoy in there."  


"What?!" Ron glared at Ginny for a quick second, before twisting around her to look in the window. "You're not going to let *him* keep us out of there, are you?"  


"Yes," she snapped, putting her hands on her hips. "I do *not* want any fights today- I can't handle it, and I don't think you want Mum to hear that you've been fighting, do you?"  


Ron gave her a Look, shaking his head. "Gin, you aren't really-"  


"I *am* really!" Ginny tugged on his arm, looking at him pleadingly. "C'mon, Ron, let's just come back later, okay? I don't want a repeat of last year before this term even starts."  


That had me interested, especially as Harry and Ron exchanged abashed looks and stepped away from the shop. As we headed for our next stop, I asked curiously, "What happened last year?"  


There was a moment of silence in which Ron became very interested in the sidewalk, Harry flushed an interesting color and Ginny glared at them both. Finally she looked at me and rolled her eyes. "We almost lost the House Cup."  


"It wasn't *just* our fault," Ron muttered, his ears beginning to turn red.  


"No..." Ginny muttered, shaking her head again. "But it wasn't Malfoy who beat himself up, you know."  


"No..." Harry said slowly. "He just started it. We weren't the only ones fighting, though."  


Ginny sighed and shrugged at me. "It was a really bad year- everybody was fighting, all the time. Dumbledore had to get involved at the end- none of the Gryffindors or Slytherins are allowed to go to Hogsmeade until after Halloween."  


I winced sympathetically. "That bad?"  


"That bad," Harry and Ron answered in unison. By then we were standing in front of a tiny old shop, and before I could look at the sign, I was being herded into the narrow, semi-dark room filled with hundreds of small boxes and a single chair. They looked like shoe boxes, but I knew- somehow- that they weren't, and I felt suddenly nervous and excited all at once. I must have jumped about a mile when an old man with very- there was no other word for it- creepy eyes appeared out of nowhere and greeted us, looking over Ginny, Harry and Ron and interrogating them about the states of their wands before turning back to me with an odd expression.  


"Well," he said, narrowing his eyes and making me very anxious. "You need a wand, I suppose, if you're here- what happened to the first?"  


"Um," I shrugged. "I... I've never had a wand before."  


He didn't look as surprised as I had thought he would- I'd been afraid he was going to tell me that I was certainly a muggle and it was no wonder I'd never had a wand, so please leave. But he didn't. Instead he simply pulled out a tape measure and began walking around the shop pulling boxes out of stacks while the tape measure measured me. By itself. If I hadn't just spent nearly two months with the Weasleys, this would have seriously freaked me out.   


Returning with a large pile of boxes, Ollivander stopped the tape measure, and took a wand from a box, explaining, "The wand chooses the witch, you know, so it's very important to have just the right combination of wood and core substances. Traditionally, unicorn hair, phoenix feather and dragon heartstrings have been the only core I've used, but recently I've had some... tricky customers. But let's see if any of these suit you before trying anything different." He handed me the wand. "Ten inches, oak, unicorn hair- No, no," he said, snatching the wand back before I had a chance to do anything other than hold it.  


This went on for a long while. Ollivander would explain the wand, hand it to me and snatch it back. I must have tried half the wands in the store and the dust was beginning to make my nose itch and eyes water. Harry and Ron were leaning against the wall looking bored and Ginny had sat down on the floor amid the discarded wands and was occasionally checking her watch. I was beginning to feel sick again, though not as badly as earlier. It had gotten so bad at one point that I'd had to leave Flourish and Blotts to get some air- and when you consider that I've worked in a bookstore for 3 years and had been looking forward to going to a wizarding one, I was feeling pretty sick. But now I was beginning to feel anxious and I didn't know if maybe that was why I felt ill. The only thing that made me feel better was that I had a letter of acceptance to Hogwarts and that just passing the Owl Emporium and Pet Shop had nearly given me a migraine from the animal's loud chatter.  


I'm not sure how long we were in the shop- or even how many wands I tried. At some point Ollivander had eyed me strangely and told me to sit down and wait. So we waited, and when he came back, he carried with him a single box. I sighed before he could say anything, thinking that maybe, after everything, I *was* just a plain old muggle and there had been some colossal mistake, because there was no way this *one* wand would work if all the others hadn't. But Ollivander was smiling strangely.  


"You know, it's quite odd. I usually have very little trouble fitting customers, but this is the third wand I've had to specially make this summer." My mind was spinning and I didn't have time to register this before he was taking the wand out of its box and holding it in the light. "This one is different than the others you've tried. It has *two* cores, and they're both a bit unorthodox, actually. 11 inches, rosewood, with a hair from a baby unicorn and one from a selkie." He handed me the wand and I felt a shiver run down my spine, and to everyone's surprise- except Ollivander's- sparks began flying out of the end of the wand.  


I paid for my wand, grinning widely, and turned to the others. Harry and Ron were in a deep, very serious conversation about something, and Ginny was biting her lip- not exactly what I had expected their reactions to be. "What's wrong?" I asked worriedly.  


"Nothing!" Ginny said a bit too quickly, turning and smiling widely at me. "Let's go- we still need robes before we have to meet Mum." She grabbed me by the arm and propelled me out of the shop, calling a 'thank you' over my shoulder.  


Ginny dragged me down the street, and I stumbled slightly. "Ginny, slow down a bit. Why are we rushing?"  


She shrugged, slowing a little. "We have to meet Mum soon and we all need robes."  


I sighed, knowing that wasn't the *whole* truth, but not sure what I could do about it. I glanced behind me and saw that Harry was lagging quite a bit behind and kept looking around, as if trying to spot something. I glanced around myself, trying to figure out what he was looking for, but when I looked ahead again, I nearly walked right into a sign post. I stopped looking anywhere but at my feet after that.  


At the robe shop, we went to go in, but Harry sort of sidled off to lounge against the wall next to the door. "Harry? You coming?" I asked, feeling a bit worried by the rather intense look on his face.  


"Hmm?" He managed to tear his eyes from the crowd and smiled at me, though it wasn't a normal smile. "I think I'll just wait out here a bit- I need some air."  


I frowned, raising a skeptical eyebrow, but Ginny was already moving to enter the shop and pulling me after her. I wondered why Harry kept scanning the crowd, but suddenly remembered that we'd seen- or *they'd* seen- Draco Malfoy earlier. What Ginny had said about fighting ran through my mind and I saw Ron move as if to wait with Harry, so I grabbed his arm. "Okay, Harry. We won't take too long," I said, smiling at Ron and pulling him into the shop after Ginny and I.  


We weren't in the shop very long- 10, 15 minutes at the most- when Harry came running in, a wide grin on his face. "Sarai!" he cried, grabbing my arm- which, at the moment, I had been about to stick into a robe. "I know where Arnica is!"  


"What?!" I cried, feeling my knees try to buckle and my stomach flip-flop. "Where?"  


But he didn't hear me, because just then a woman came running into the shop with a panicked scream, screeching about Sirius Black. Harry paled, turning to see, and I grabbed his sleeve, nearly falling off of the stool. "Harry! Wher-"  


"Fuck!" he snapped, tearing away and bolting from the shop, looking very angry as he forcefully shoved his way through the crowd of hysterical people pushing their way into the shop.  


I stood on the stool for about half a second after Harry left, staring after him in shock. Arnica... I jumped off the stool and began shoving people out of my way as I headed after Harry. The closer to the door I got, the harder it was to get through, because everyone wanted in and no one wanted to let me out. When I finally made it out the door, someone behind me grabbed my arm and I tried to tear it away, turning to yell at them. 

"Ron!" I cried in surprise. "Let go, Harry said-"  


"Sarai, it's not-" But I didn't hear what he said next because someone slammed into me and I staggered off the steps into the street. I craned my neck, trying to find Harry, thinking only that he knew where Arnica was and I was silently praying that she wasn't here in this mob. It was like going swimming during high tide, trying to move in this crowd of panicking people- I was jostled back and forth, and I knew that if I'd tried to stand still I'd have been trampled. Someone was pushed against me, and I staggered, not falling only because they grabbed me by the arms. I looked up- it was Ron again, looking worried and trying to scan the crowd. "We've got to go back," he said, leaning in so that I could hear him.  


I shook my head, trying to pull away again, but he had a much tighter grip this time and we continued to be bumped and pushed along by the rioters. "Where's Harry?" I looked around, trying to find him. I felt sick again, my headache back full force and getting worse, my stomach rebelling against the rough treatment I was receiving and my knees feeling ready to buckle. I felt completely out of control. I hated the fact that I couldn't even stand still- the crowd was writhing and moving so fiercely that the only thing keeping me from being pushed in twenty directions at once or being trampled was Ron's grip on my arms. I saw someone, not far from me, fall and go down. I felt my chest seize up and I couldn't breath right and my headache flared and things got very blurry. I got dizzy, and suddenly it was dark and I felt like I was falling....  


.....I felt very warm and very secure as I began to wake up. I didn't really *want* to wake up, but I knew it was a matter of time. I felt like I was being dragged out of a deep, deep sleep and all I wanted to do was roll over without even opening my eyes and to sink back into whatever I had been dreaming. Except... somehow I couldn't. At the edge of my consciousness, I could hear noises, and I couldn't seem to ignore them. I began to make out individual voices, and I wondered why people were talking when I was sleeping. I woke slowly, my eyes not wanting to open.  


"Fred, I swear to god, I will fold you in half and shove you so far up George's arse you will be one person if you don't be quiet and let Sarai sleep!"  


I opened my eyes, more surprised than anything, and blinked in the light, moaning slightly when my dormant headache tried to resurface. "Wha..." I frowned, trying to focus and look around at the people in the room with me. Ron was sitting on the edge of my bed, looking a bit shocked, and Harry was sitting on Ginny's bed.  


"Well, now look what you've done, Ron. You went and woke her." I glanced toward the door and saw the twins, Fred grinning and shrugging. "Looks like you'll have to try that later."  


Ron made as if to lunge at his brothers, who laughed and left the room, shutting the door behind them. Ron shook his head with a sigh, sitting back on the bed, and smiled apologetically at me. "Sorry."  


I frowned, wondering vaguely why he and Harry were in here. And then... I couldn't remember coming home. We'd been in Diagon Alley... There'd been a riot. 

"What..." I glanced around the room. "How'd I..." I trailed off, struggling to sit up. "Harry!" I looked over at him, suddenly panicked as I remembered why there'd been a riot and I'd been out in it.  


Harry winced, and I felt like I'd just been punched in the stomach. "Harry... You said-"  
  


"I know," he interrupted quietly. He looked at the floor, sighing. "Sarai..." he hesitated, glancing at Ron, who gestured for him to go on. "What do you know about Sirius Black?"  


"I know... a lot," I said slowly, not sure why that mattered. "Why? What's that got to do with anything? You said you knew where Arnica was."  


"She was with Sirius," Harry finally said. "He told me. And I went to get you... And then..."  


I stared at him, confused. "Then...?"  


"The riot," Ron said, looking at me worriedly.  


I felt my heart sink into the pit of my stomach. "The riot... Oh, my god." I turned to Harry again, beginning to panic. "What about Arnica? Was she there? Is she all right? Where is she?"  


Harry sighed heavily. "I don't know. She was there, but... I don't know," he repeated miserably.  


"What d'you mean, you don't know?" I looked desperately from him to Ron. "Did you see her? Are you *sure* she was there? I mean... Did you *look* for her?"  


"No," Harry shrugged. "Sirius said she was there. I didn't... It was hard to do anything. We had to leave, I mean, you fainted and it was too dangerous-"  


"It was too dangerous!" I cried, feeling light-headed and panicked. "And you just... you just *left*! You didn't even bother to *look* for her! What if something happened to her? Why didn't you try to find her? Harry! You just *left* her!"  


"Sarai," Ron interrupted me. "Harry couldn't do anything- nobody could. It's not his fault."  


I looked at him for a second, and I saw the way he was frowning at me and I couldn't help it. I just lost control and started crying, pulling my legs up to my chest and hiding my face in my arms. "I'm sorry," I managed to get out, looking back up at Harry. "It's just... She was right there!" My throat closed up on a sob and I buried my face again, barely registering Harry patting my shoulder and telling me that it was okay before he left.  


"Sarai..." Ron touched my arm and I flinched, crying harder. "I didn't mean... C'mon, please stop crying," he pleaded, sounding miserable.  


I shook my head in my arms, hugging my knees closer to me. "It's not fair..."  


Ron squeezed my arm slightly. "I know," he said softly.  


"I'm sorry," I muttered, leaning against him.  


He slid his arm around my shoulders. "No, don't be. I'm sorry." He was quiet while I managed to get myself under control, then said, "It'll be all right."  


I sighed and looked at him. "I don't know."  


Ron looked surprised. "What do you mean? Of course it will! So, you wait one more week- you've waited all summer. You'll see Arnica and the others when we get to school. You'll probably see them on the train."  


I blinked at him. "You think so?"  


He nodded and surprised me when he suddenly leaned over and hugged me. "It'll be fine," he said. "Don't worry so much."  


I leaned against him, hugging back. "I'll try."  


"Good." I smiled into his shoulder until he began to pull back. I pulled back too, starting to wipe my eyes when he kissed me.  


Suddenly, George came barreling through the door, calling Ron's name. He stopped in his tracks and his eyes nearly popped out of his head when we sprang apart. He nodded, grinning like the Cheshire cat. "Well- right then." He turned to leave, yelling as he did, "Fred! They're kissing!"  


Ron groaned, falling backwards and covering his face with his hands. "I hate them."  


I suddenly couldn't help it- I just started laughing and couldn't stop. I felt light-headed and giddy and my emotions were on a non-stop roller coaster I wanted to get off of but couldn't and I lost it. Everything just seemed hysterical and once I'd started I couldn't stop. Ron looked at me strangely before starting to laugh himself.  


We laughed for a long time and when we finally calmed ourselves down, he took my hand and smiled. "One more week," he said and then he kissed me again.


	5. Finding Hogwarts

****************

Arnica

****************

I positively adore Seamus. When my story came gushing out in a flood of tears and sniffles he just passed me a cigarette, told me he always thought Sirius Black's case was too convenient, and offered me a space on his floor in his new flat.  
" I just moved away from home." He says proudly, unlocking a small apartment which would be very shabby if not for the excellent decorating involved. The walls are hung with miniature tapestries and his furniture and decorations are an odd mix of oriental and Celtic. " My Da's an Auror and what with 'He-who-must-smell-like-cheese'." I snicker at him, following him down a small narrow hallway. " After the aurors, they put my younger sisters and brother in ministry, my parents in a safe house, and I'm hiding here. I'm babbling again, aren't I?" I grin at him.  
" It's been almost two months since I heard anyone other than Sirius and myself. Babble as much as you like." He has the best smile. Bright and open and absolutely full of shit.  
" So you're from a whole different version of Earth. And Everyone's a muggle there you say?" I shrug.  
" It's not that we're not all muggles as much as there's nothing to separate people who would be from people who would be wizards..." I pass a wavy mirror and stop in shock. " Oh my god!" I put my hands up to my face and hair.  
My hands trace along my cheek bones, almost startlingly prominent from where my face has lost the full moon roundness. I long ago gave up on trying to comb and keep my curly, kinky hair in a semblance of order and it has retaliated by spiraling into a collection of braids and dread-locks that hang in my face, dirty and dull. My pants cling desperately to my hips, held up by a fraying piece of rope and in the end, I'm a poster girl for desperation. I watch with detached horror as my hands ghost over my large rib cage and down over a shrunken stomach and flaring back over wide hips, falling alongside my long legs.  
" What's wrong?" Seamus asks, perplexed.  
" This isn't me." I whisper, looking at the strange woman in the mirror. The one with the figure I always wanted. The one that I don't want to see. "I don't really look like this you know." I reassure him. " I mean...I...I'm fat. I'm not... this isn't me and I don't look like this and my hair's not normally this tangled and..." Seamus rests a heavy hand on my shoulder.  
" First off, with the exception of an amazing amount of dirt, I happen to think you look great. Secondly, even if you didn't look like this before, you really do now so if you want to go take a shower, my bath's right on the left there and I could get you some clothes to wear while I take care of yours..."  
" Don't get rid of them!" I gasp. " These are my clothes from home!"  
" I'm just gonna throw them in the laundry." He reassures me. " So here, go take yourself a very long bath," He steers me towards the bathroom, waving his wand and lighting the multitude of incense and candles around the white room. " There's a small stereo in the cupboard if you want music and towels in the closet there." I pull out my cd book, Seamus take my bag. " I'll be back in about half an hour." He promises. " Sounds like you've had a fuck all time of things. Try and relax."  
I sink into the hot water of the bath. I showered and scrubbed for close to fifteen minutes before I decided that I was clean enough to tolerate being in a tub and now I roll my shoulders, sinking down into the bubbles. I haven't taken a bubble bath in forever and it feel so good that I close my eyes for a second to soak up the warmth, letting the music of Mythos and Lifehouse and anyone else on my cd flow through me.  
" You alive in there?" I sit up suddenly in the chilled water, looking towards the bathroom door.  
" I fell asleep." I call, standing up out of the tub, turning on the water quickly and rinsing the soap off my body and wrapping in a big fluffy white towel. Seamus spoils himself more than any straight man I've ever met. I open the door slightly and he's there with a collection of bags.  
" Your clothes are still drying, so here's something for you to wear. I had to guess at the sizes." He prattles as he shoves the bags into my arms and hustles me towards his room. " Try them on, I can always return whatever doesn't fit."  
" But.." He grins at me.  
" Arnica, the last time I got to have free reign shopping for someone was over a year ago. Indulge me."  
I lock the door and laugh as I put the bags down, looking through one of them. One bag is purely underwear. Bras and panties of varying colors and sizes. I go over towards the door.  
" A bag of underwear for someone you don't know?" I call. " You're awfully interesting Seamus Finnigan!"  
" Hey, would you rather go commando when you don't have to?" He calls. " Besides, it's a very small bag!" I put on a set and start shifting through the bags, slinging on a long, flowing black robe, pulling my shoulder length dreads back with an elastic. I come out and he grins. " You make a great witch. Did I get the right sizes?"  
" Pretty much. Eights and tens fight fine." He nods.  
" I had a girlfriend about your size." I yawn, trying not to look like I'm not falling asleep on my feet, which I am. " Tired?"  
" Exhausted." I yawn. Seamus nods.  
" You can grab the bed. I have a date. I make you push over when I get back." He turns and pauses. " You gonna be okay here by yourself?"   
" I don't plan on being awake long enough to not be okay."  
It's well into the afternoon sometime some other day when Seamus wakes me up from a screaming nightmare.  
" You okay?" I have the vague impression that a few days have gone by and the half healed hickies on Seamus' neck just proves it. " What's wrong?"  
_:: There's a rip in the sky and I'm embedded in the ground, but this time I can't crawl out of the ground. It swallows me whole::  
_" Oh god." I lean forward, burying my head in my hands. " Don't I ever get a break." He rubs my back reassuringly.  
" Sure you do. You just need to get your mind off things. You need to come out with me tonight. It'll make you forget about everything for a little bit." He slips out of bed and into a low pair of cargo shorts.  
" How can I forget about all this! Jesus Seamus it's all my fault. That everyone's families probably think we're dead, that the ministry's gonna catch Sirius, and I'm just gonna go out tonight and forget all this?!"  
" Come on now!" Seamus pulls me to my feet and then almost off them in his enthusiasm. " The ministry doesn't have him or a clue about where he is or they would have it splashed all over the Daily Prophet. I'm sure Sirius is laying low somewhere and that You need this night to relax!"  
" Sure Seamus. And how are you going to help me relax?" I scoff. The bloody Irish bastard grins at me as if he had been planning this for days now, even though he's only known me a few days, most of which I spent sleeping.  
" First, I'm gonna take you shopping and then," I don't trust the way his eyes light up. "I'm gonna take you dancing."  
I sigh, looking around the dark, strobe filled room. The club teeters on the verge of gothic, but the beats are too rhythmic and makeup involved is too exotically colorful. It's a Wizard-jungle-salsa-rave and I'm comfortable in my leather skirt with the gold threads running through it and black silk shirt. My makeup is deep and I'm ancient eqyptianneogothic dom and Seamus is just...Classic. His boots a mass of leather, steel and zippers. A white silk and lace shirt and black vinyl pants and best of all, an old school robe, the sleeves ripped out and the crest on the front stylized. He gives the blonde at the door more than what he asked for our cover charge and it's only because I was watching his hand that I saw the bag slipped into his palm. He takes my hand and pulls me into the building and directly into the middle of the floor, handing me a small blue capsule. I lift an eyebrow as he swallows his.  
" It's Snitch." He explains. " It's a lot like muggle "E" but better. The worst anyone's ever ended up after doing Snitch was once Fred Weasley ended up puking on George." I look down at it and shrug. He did warn me he intended for me to relax and forget about things tonight. I swallow the little blue pill.  
I wake up sprawled across the floor in Seamus' flat. I open one eye slowly and see he's only made it into the kitchen before he passed out. I try and think back on how we even got home, but all I can remember is bits and pieces of the club. Staggering to my feet, I stumble over, jabbing Seamus in the ribs with my toe.  
" Wake up Seamus!" I say loudly. " What day is it?"  
" The first." He mutters, glancing through barely open eyes at the display on his clock.. We're both silent for a second. " Fuck!" He yelps, sitting straight up. " what time is it!?"   
" Eight." I say, looking over at the clock on the wall.  
" Fuckity fuck fuck fuck!" the irish boy mutters, jumping up. " He laced my shit! I can't believe we slept through two days!" He's running around the flat, waving his wand and frantically summoning things while I hop out of the club clothes and into a pair of short and a white shirt, shoving my other clothes on top of his and slamming his trunk closed. It's nice to have my bag feel so much lighter. " Shit! Call me a taxi or something!" I roll my eyes, resisting the urge to say 'you're a taxi' and pick up the phone, thumbing through the phone book quickly.  
" Um, hi, we have a nine 'o' five train to catch At kings cross. Can you send a taxi to... Seamus, what's your address?"  
" 1110 Melancourt."  
" 1110 Melancourt? five minutes? Thanks." I grab up some of Seamus's things, helping him throw the last of his clothes in a bag. He's still wearing his makeup, but there's no time to wash it off, or even wash up. The grimace on his face means the same thought just crossed his mind as well.  
" Oh well." He sighs. " There's a loo on the train! Come on!" We run out the door, lugging trunks and bags.  
It's five minutes to nine when the cab screeches to a halt by kings cross and the driver helps unload the trunk none too gently. I'm only five minutes from getting on the train to Hogwarts...when I hear a deep familiar bark. I turn and it's Padfoot and around his neck is one of those stupid choke leads dogcatchers use. I take a step towards him.  
" What in the bloody fuck are you doing?!" Seamus asks. " We're gonna miss the train!" I look longingly towards the gates before shrugging him lose.  
" I was gonna walk anyway. I have to help Sirius, but if you see my friends, any of them...tell them I'm coming!" And I run across the street, scraping my knees as I hurl myself down on the pavement, across Padfoot like some modern day prima donna pocohantis and begin the best acting I've ever done. " Not my dog! Please don't take my dog!" I screech, drawing the attention of everyone walking by, " He was the last thing my m-m-mum ever gave me and I been looking all over for him and PLEASE DON'T TAKE MY DOG!" I howl, tears of frustration at missing my quickest way to my friends adding credibility to my performance. Around me a crowd of people have formed and they're all on my side, grumbling about the cruelty of taking my pet from me. Abashed, the dog keeper turns Sirius loose and without a word, I jump up and we dash as fast as we can into the train station, ignoring the shouts and cries of the guards and patrons. " It's three after nine and if I can just make it... The wall looms ahead of me thick and cement, and if I'm wrong this is gonna hurt like hell.   
I slip right through it, stumbling and falling into a roll on the platform, my bag hitting me in the head. I sit up dazed as Sirius whines, licking my hand apologetically as the shiny red engine pulls away from the platform. I bury my head in his fur, rubbing it gently.  
" 'Sokay Sirius." I mutter, standing up. " We planned on walking anyway. Come on. Let's get something to eat first." I dig out a few sickles and we head towards the small restaurant.

*****************************************************************

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Sarai, part 5  
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It seemed like no time before the end of summer had arrived and life in the Burrow was filled with last-minute packing and lost socks and put-off homework. But September 1st came, and despite Harry's lost Potion book (found in the attic with the ghoul), and Pig's almost-refusal to get into his cage, somehow we managed to make it to King's Cross in time to slip through the barrier to Platform 9 and 3/4. I didn't get to look around as much as I would have liked, because by then we had only fifteen minutes to get onto the train and find a compartment. We didn't have to look very hard, however, because we found Hermione Granger in the last compartment. We said goodbye to Mrs. Weasley and began settling ourselves in for the ride amid introductions and explanations. Hermione was   
  
I leaned my head against the window, smiling as Harry, Ron and Hermione began teasing each other about something. The station was emptying and the train blew its whistle as it prepared to leave. I looked toward the barrier and- to my shock- saw someone tumble through, followed by a large, black Newfoundland. I frowned, sitting up and trying to get a closer look at her- she looked familiar somehow, and I had a sneaking suspicion that I pushed away. The train lurched as it began moving and when she looked up, I gasped, my chest tightening in panic. "Arnica..." I breathed, rooted to the seat in shock.  
  
"Arnica!"  
  
Suddenly I jumped up, stumbling past Ron, and brushing his arm away as I tried to get to the isle. "Let me go!" I cried frantically and beginning to really panic. "Stop the train; let me go!" I tore away and ran for the back door- I don't know what I was thinking, but the only thing I knew was that Arnica was out there, on the platform, and not on the train with me. I had just grabbed hold of the door handle when someone- Ron, probably- grabbed me around the waist and hauled me away from the door. I barely registered what he was saying to me as I struggled free. "Let me go, damn it! That's Arnica- she's supposed to *be* here!! I have to help her! Stop the damn train!"  
  
I managed to free myself from Ron's grip and lunged for the door again, only for him, Harry and a boy I hadn't met and didn't recognize to grab hold of me and keep me from Arnica. "Let me go!!" I screamed, hysterical and in the middle of a full-fledged panic attack. "You assholes, let go of me! I have to- Let go! Stop the train- do *something*! Let go!"  
  
I broke away and made to open the door, but instead found myself watching the station- and Arnica- slide away from me faster and faster. My heart fell into the pit of my stomach and I felt my throat close up. I pressed my hands against the glass of the window, straining my eyes to try and see her, but the train had turned and I couldn't. I started shaking and whirled on Harry and Ron- the other boy had left- with angry tears stinging my eyes. I was suddenly angrier than I could ever remember being, and I could hardly manage to breathe. "What the *hell* did you do that for?!"  
  
Ron frowned, looking worried, but I didn't register it. "Sarai... You were going to jump off the train."  
  
"So?!" I cried, so angry I could hardly see straight. "You should have *let* me! Why didn't you stop the damn train?!"  
  
"We couldn't," Harry said quietly. "You-"  
  
"Stop it!" I shrieked, glaring furiously at him. "It's not fair! She was right there- Right There, damn it, and you stopped me! It wasn't supposed to be like this! She missed the fucking train and you stopped me!"  
  
"Sarai..." Ron said, hesitantly approaching me. "Come on, think for a minute. You'd have hurt yourself, and missed the train, too."  
  
"Fuck that!" I think I swore more in those few moments than I had in my entire life. "Then I'd've missed the train! But she-I-we-" I was hyperventilating, gasping for air and crying and desperate and furious and all I wanted to do was crawl into a corner and start bawling, but I was too mad. "*Twice*, damn it! *Twice*! It's not fair! We were supposed to be together now! We were never supposed to be apart!"  
  
Ron touched my arm warily. "Sarai... It'll be all right."  
  
I lost it then. I pulled my arm away and reached back and slapped him hard across the face, putting all my anger and frustration into it and not even thinking about what I was doing or who was watching or how I'd never hit anyone like that in my entire life. "Fuck you! It will *not* be all right! It's *not* all right, and it hasn't *been* all right since we left for that *damn* trip to New York. It was a *three day* trip, and it's almost been three *months*! And Arnica was *not* all right! You don't know her, she doesn't *look* like that! I don't know where she's been, or who she's been with, or what's happened to her, and she doesn't fucking *look* like that! She was so thin... It's not *fair*, damn it! She's supposed to okay; we're not supposed to be here. I was gonna meet them at school, so we could go *home*, but now Arnica's back there and not here and you stopped me! It's. Not. All. Right! I'm never going to-" I stopped, my throat closing as I looked at Ron.   
  
My eyes widened as I realized what I had done, seeing the red mark on his face and the strange look he was wearing. I stared for a long moment before covering my face with my hands, and feeling my anger drain away. It left me shaking madly and before I knew it I was crying hysterically, feeling like I'd just lost everything and there was nothing I could do about it.   
  
"I'm sorry," I muttered between sobs and gasps for breath. I looked up at him again, barely able to see because I was crying harder than I could remember crying in a long time. I felt guilty and desperate and I could hardly breath, but I buried my face again, and gasped out, "I-I didn't... I didn't mean to...I'm sorry, I-" I broke off with a sob, pressing my hands into my eyes. I sputtered incoherently a bit more before giving up and just sobbing, feeling like I was breaking in half.  
  
I don't know how long I stood there crying, but suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder and I jumped about a mile, looking up into Ron's eyes. He looked worried and apologetic, biting his lip uncertainly. I took several broken breaths before managing to get out another apology, but he shook his head and said quietly, "Don't. It's okay, really."  
  
I shook my head, trying to tell him that it wasn't, but not able to get the words out. I wanted to try and get myself back under control, but I couldn't and trying just made it worse. I sobbed harder, hiding my face again and feeling my legs want to collapse under me, but I was startled when I felt him put his arms around me. I tried half-heartedly to pull away, but when he didn't let go, I leaned into him, grabbing his shirt in my fists and pressing my face into the crook of his neck.  
  
After a while- I'm not sure how long- I managed to get myself under some semblance of control, and I pulled away from Ron, wiping my eyes when he let me go. I gave him a shaky half-smile that faded quickly when I saw the mark on his face. "I'm sorry," I said with a shuddering breath. "I didn't mean to... I wasn't thinking."  
  
He smiled at me gently. "Don't worry, okay? It's not a big deal."  
  
I wiped my face again, looking down at the floor and feeling myself begin to blush. Ron touched my arm and when I looked up, he hugged me quickly and then took my hand. "Come on, I think you should sit down."  
  
I nodded silently and let him lead me back to our seats. I sank onto the seat between the window and Ron, and smiled sheepishly at Ginny, wiping my face hastily. She smiled back sympathetically.  
  
"Where are Harry and Hermione?" I asked, trying to ignore how embarrassed I was.  
  
Ginny smirked slightly. "They went to see why Seamus was wearing those weird clothes and that makeup."  
  
I was confused for a moment. "Seamus..." I glanced at Ron. "That was Seamus?" I asked, remembering the other boy who'd kept me from jumping off the train.  
  
Ron nodded and reached for a chocolate frog from among the goodies that had somehow appeared since we left the station. "Here," he said, handing it to me.  
  
I accepted the chocolate and ate it distractedly, leaning against Ron's shoulder and staring out the window. *I can't believe she was right there... I miss her so much. Arnica, and Zoe and Aradia....* I shut my eyes and sighed slightly, holding off another breakdown only because I was so exhausted from my last one.  
  
I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew, I was being jarred awake by Ron, who abruptly stood up. I dimly saw him shove a blonde boy out the door and slam it shut before plunking himself back down next to me angrily. I rubbed my eyes, sitting up fully and noticed that Harry and Hermione were back. "What's going on?"  
  
"Malfoy," Ron grumbled angrily. "I swear, if he-"  
  
"What?" Ginny asked, looking upset herself. "You can't do anything, Ron. You either, Harry. You heard Dumbledore last year- there can't be anymore fights."  
  
* * * * *  
  
The castle was huge. Bigger and more impressive even than the one in the poster on my wall at home. And real.  
  
I stepped out of the carriage and just stood there gaping open-mouthed at the crown milling about before the steps to the largest and oddest-looking castle I'd ever imagined. I didn't have time to gawk, though, because Ron took my hand and we started weaving our way through the crowd.  
  
"Come on," Ron said. "That's Dumbledore on the stairs. We'd better go see him."  
  
Harry joined us and we made our way up the stairs rather quickly. Nervously, I followed them, but before we had reached the top, there was a shriek in the crowd behind us and I thought I heard my name. I turned and saw the crowd part a little and my stomach dropped right out from under me when I saw who was running toward the stairs.  
  
"Aradia!" I cried, hurtling down the stairs, somehow managing not to fall on my face. I crashed into her, grabbing her in a tight hug and started sobbing and laughing at the same time. I'm sure we created quite a scene, crying and laughing and babbling away like we did, but we were too happy to care.  
  
Someone had the good sense to take us to a little room where we could continue our reunion without the entire school. Trying to answer and ask questions at once, while trying to take in all Aradia was telling me (she'd spent the summer in Draco Malfoy's *closet*?), I babbled away about Ron and the Burrow and couldn't stop hugging her to make sure she was real.  
  
I was just beginning to calm down when there were hurried footsteps in the hall and someone came flying into the room, crying our names. "Zoe!!" Aradia and I screamed, grabbing her as she flung her arms around us and it all began again.  
  
I was so happy to see them, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry and so couldn't stop doing either. After missing Arnica on the train, I'd seriously begun to think I might never see any of them again, so even when someone came to tell us that we should clean ourselves up because we had to come out and be sorted (Zoe was an aide?), I only barely managed to pull myself together and wiped my face hastily, grinning like and idiot and not wanting to blink for fear they'd disappear.  
  
We followed Zoe to the Great Hall- or, rather, clung to her as she took us there. The Great Hall was amazing- huge and imposing and full of people who turned to stare at us when we entered. I could feel myself turning red and gave Zoe a last hug as she was introduced as a teacher's aide and went to sit at the head table.  
  
I had barely any time to collect myself before Aradia and I were introduced and I found myself being called forward to be sorted. I panicked, but walked nervously to the little stool and put the hat on my head.  
  
"Aren't you a bit old for this?" I heard a voice in my ear say.  
  
Well, you know..... I thought dejectedly, sighing slightly. Give me a break. I'm supposed to be going to college, not some wizarding school that's technically not supposed to exist. And it's not like I wanted this- I didn't even really want to go on that stupid trip.  
  
The hat laughed. "Yes, you did." After that, it was quiet a moment and I bit my lip nervously.  
  
"Well, you are interesting. I've never before had to sort a mind that thinks it knows where it belongs."  
  
What? Thinks? No! No thinking! I'm not thinking anything! I thought desperately, my hopes sinking.  
  
The hat chuckled and then said "Hmmm.... Let's see here.... Loyal, even-tempered, a peace-maker..."  
  
I sighed. I'm a Hufflepuff, aren't I? But I don't wanna be in Hufflepuff.... I began panicking slightly, thinking about how the only people I knew were in Gryffindor, and it was bad enough not being able to go home, but I had just found Zoe and Aradia, and Zoe wasn't even going to be in a house....  
  
The hat laughed, again. I'm not that funny... "Yes, you are," it replied, amused. "And I happen to be quite fond of Hufflepuffs, but I don't know that a Hufflepuff could have gone on the adventure you've had and kept quite this sane."  
  
No? I thought, hopefully.  
  
"Hmmm.... No," the hat said slowly. "Besides, I think it might be best for you to stay in the familiar surroundings of GRYFFINDOR!"  
  
Relieved, I took the hat off, smiled at Aradia and made my way to where I saw Ron, Harry, Hermione and Ginny sitting. Sinking into an empty seat, I smiled meekly at those who congratulated me, and turned to watch Aradia be sorted. The hat didn't take long before it shouted "Slytherin!" and my heart sunk. After all this time and Zoe, Aradia and I were *still* separated.... But I caught Zoë's eye and felt a huge weight lift off of me as she grinned at me. We weren't in a House together- but that was nothing after this summer. Arnica wasn't with us- yet. She would be. I suddenly felt like everything would work out.

***Zoe***  


I thought he was going to help me. That's what he was supposed to do. The great Albus Dumbledore can't even get me my friends and send me home. Figures. What good is he then? And I wanted so much...

I miss them, you know? They're my best friends, and we went away to spend time with each other, and now we're split up. I have to go to college in two weeks now, and I don't even know how to get home, or if I'll actually get to my school, or when I'll get to see all my friends again. I know Aradia and Sarai are ok, because Dumbledore told me. He's been in touch with them, but I can't be. He thinks it will upset their fragile mental states. He's probably right, but I know Sarai. She'll be the most unstable. I missed her birthday… I wish I could have been there. Even if she is with the Weasleys, I bet she was sad, and I'm sorry.

I don't know where Arnica is at all. I only know she made it through alright. She was in Diagon Alley, with Sirius Black. I guess they caused a riot, but I don't know if they made it out alright. All I have is what Dumbledore's told me, and I guess he doesn't know everything. That's too bad, because I thought he did…

So I'm sitting up here, alone, on the top of the astronomy tower, thinking. I miss my friends, my home, my family, my car, my computer… Everything, I guess. I just want my life back. Fate sucks, you know? I never did anything to it, but here it is, biting me in the ass. I mean, shit. Remus thinks I'm taking it a bit too hard, but he doesn't really understand. He doesn't know what it's like to be comfortable one minute, to have an identity you're cool with, and all of a sudden it's gone. Poof. Like magic. Ha.

That's another thing I'm not too thrilled about. It was ok when I thought it would go away, but now I know that it won't. Not for a good long while, and all of a sudden, this whole random personal transfiguration thing is getting on my nerves. Yeah, sure I can control it, but that's not the point. The point is that I'm not supposed to be able to do it. Magic isn't supposed to exist. I shouldn't be able to be some weird freakish thing that is something one minute and something else the next. The world's not supposed to work that way. And, yeah, Remus says it's normal, but you know, it isn't normal for me.

I sigh. "I quit," I mutter, staring up into the night sky.

"You quit what?"

My head whips around and I yank out my wand from my back pocket. I'm about to curse the living daylights out of the person whose head is just now sticking up the trapdoor to the top of the astronomy tower when I notice exactly who it was that startled me. "Remus!" I gasp, tucking the wand back into my pocket and running my other hand through my hair in a nervous gesture. "I'm gonna kill you! Don't sneak up on me like that!" I shake my head and sit back down, heart still racing.

Remus sits down beside me. "What's wrong, Zoë?"

"Nothing," I murmur, not looking at him. "What makes you think there's something wrong?"

He shrugs and looks up at the night sky. "Oh, maybe it's that you've been up here for the past four hours, and you haven't come down for dinner."

"Not hungry," I mutter.

I can hear him raising his eyebrow. "Ha. The day you're not hungry at dinner time is the day I'll streak through the Great Hall on opening day."

I roll my eyes, standing up quickly and starting to pace. "Then you better get ready to be embarrassed, smart ass. Jesus!! Why the hell won't you people leave me alone! I'm fine! I'm not hungry, I'm not upset, I'm just fucking peachy! Now leave me alone!"

Remus stands up and grabs my arm. "No. Dammit Zoë, you need to stop moping! They're fine, you know they're fine. Dumbledore told you they're fine. You're going to see them in two bloody weeks!"

I glare at him, eyes narrowed. "No, Remus," I say darkly. "They are not fine. Did you know Sarai's birthday was yesterday? Yeah, that means my best friend was alone for her eighteenth birthday. And guess what, believe it or not, I actually miss my sister. We're close. We haven't been separated for more than two weeks in our entire lives! Yeah, I know we're both going away to college soon, but not yet. It wasn't supposed to be this soon. I don't even know what happened to Arnica. No one does, not even Dumbledore. She could be dead, for all I know. Honestly Remus, you think I can just get over this, that it's not that big a deal? It is, and I won't. Now leave me the fuck alone."

Remus blinks at me, and I can see anger rising in his eyes. His grip on my arm tightens, and I just have time to brace myself before he explodes. "At least you're going to see your friends again!! They're just a few miles away!! Mine are DEAD!! They were murdered, and when they died, I died. Sirius died. Their deaths destroyed lives, Zoë! Compared to that, this is just a short inconvenience!"

"Fuck you Remus!! At least you still had a world to turn to! At least your rules are still the same no matter what happened to James and Lily! You had your fucking family! You had other things to work towards and think about! All I can fucking do is sit here and wonder how they are and if Arnica's even alive! She's one of my best friends, Remus!! She was, like, the first person to know that I was gay, and she could be gone!"

I feel his muscles tense, and that's the last warning I have before I'm flat on my back, feeling like I just got hit with a battering ram in the face.

"Ahh… Shit…" I mutter, standing up slowly, making sure I'm still all in one piece.

Remus is standing in front of me, looking shocked and rubbing his fist. It takes me a minute to figure out what that means, and I can hear him starting to apologize.

"Oh, God, Zoë… I'm…"

I don't let him finish. "You fucking prick!" I jump at him, knocking him to the ground, and calling him everything but a child of God. I don't know what's happening anymore. We're rolling around, and I'm fighting as dirty as I know how. I'm biting, scratching, kicking and hitting, but then, so's he. I think I'm winning, because I manage to land a fist on some piece of flesh almost every swing, but I can't tell. He's landing a few good punches of his own. I grab something and twist, hard, and it's followed by a satisfying snapping noise, and Remus screams, but neither of us stops.

It's not until we're so tired and spent from fighting and screaming that we fall apart, lying on our backs and staring at the sky. I still want to hurt him, make him feel as lonely and scared as I feel, but I don't have the energy to punch him anymore. Staring up at the sky, I use my last weapon, the last thing I have to hurt him.

"You know what, Remus?" I ask, panting.

"What?"

"Sirius was in that riot too." I hear a sharp intake of breath that tells me my words did as they were intended to do. I hurt him.

"I know." The words are almost drowned out by a long exhale, like he doesn't want to breathe anymore, and I know he knows how I feel. I'm not sorry yet, but I know I will be. I don't care though.

"Have you heard from him since the riot?" I know I'm rubbing salt now, but I still don't care.

"No."

"I'm sorry." But I'm not, really, and I think he knows it.

"Right."

I don't know how long we lay on the roof like that. Maybe hours. Probably. The moon is high in the night sky before either of us tries to say anything.

I open my mouth to say something, maybe that I'm sorry, even though I'm not sure that I am yet, but he interrupts me.

"I'm sorry, Zoë," he says quietly.

I look over at him. "Yeah. Me too." And I am, really. Not sorry about hitting him, because I still think he deserved it, but I'm sorry I was so awful about Sirius. My best friend is missing, but Sirius is his soul mate.

We're still lying here, and I don't think we're going to get up, and we're not really talking, but it's comfortable now. Almost like I could go to sleep and not be afraid he'd well… do something evil. Yeah. We're better off than we were a few hours ago. I yawn, and I can hear him laugh, but I don't really care. I smile and wiggle carefully (did he really manage to hit me that much?) and painfully over so that I can rest my head on his stomach: much more comfortable than the cold stone floor of the astronomy tower. My head bobs a little as he laughs silently and puts his left arm under his own head.

And that's how we stay all night. Finally, the sun starts to come up, and we both know we need to go in, if for no other reason than to have Madame Pomfrey patch us up. We _are_ in a sorry state.

I roll into a standing position, and offer Remus my hands to help him up. He grins and pulls himself up using only his left hand, holding his right hand against his chest, not moving it. I look at him curiously. "What's wrong with your right hand?"

He grimaces. "Um… I think you broke it…"

"Oh… That was the twisting, popping, screaming, sequence we had back there…" I grin. "You deserved it."

He shrugs. "Maybe."

I take his arm, and we lean on each other all the way down the stairs of the tower, and to the hospital wing. I knock on the door to the infirmary, and soon, Madame Pomfrey opens it, peering out at us from under the mass of curlers on her head. "Yes?" She asks sleepily.

"Um…" I begin. "We, well, kinda got into a bit of a fight…"

She rolls her eyes and steps aside to allow us to enter. "Come in," she mutters.

Remus and I shuffle in, heads hanging like bad children who've just been chided by their parents. Madame Pomfrey tosses me an ice pack to hold over my swollen eye before turning her attention to Remus' wrist, which, now that I look at it, is at a rather odd angle. She pulls a large roll of fabric from a cupboard and sets it beside where Remus rests on one of the hospital beds. Gently, she takes his wrist and brings it towards her. She looks at him sympathetically. "Now, this is going to hurt a bit…" Before he has a chance to take his hand from her fingers, she sets the bone.

"Ah! Fuck!" Remus yells, trying to pull his hand back. The woman holds it in a vice grip, and grabs the roll of fabric still sitting placidly on the bed. She wraps it quickly around his arm and hand, and with a wave of her wand, it becomes that solid cast material that all muggle casts are made of. Similar to the one I had, actually, when I broke my ankle. And I thought she could heal injuries by potions and wands, and stuff… I sigh. Nothing here is like I expected it.

Remus seems to have expected something different as well, because he's watching Madame Pomfrey like she's actually just playing a joke on him. "Are you serious?" he asks. "I thought we were just doing this to the students…"

She glances at him severely. "No, Remus, I believe we decided to treat _all_ fighting with basic, non-magical remedies, in order to stamp it out. Am I correct?"

"Well, yes, but… I'm a professor! I'll need my right hand to write, to smoke, to drink coffee… I shouldn't have told you about the whole smoking thing, huh?"

The look on her face tells me that he's absolutely right, and that she really didn't wan to hear that he was smoking. "I don't really care what you need your right hand for, Mr. Lupin," she says crisply. I giggle, thinking of some of the things he might want his right hand for. She glares at me quickly before continuing. "You should have thought of that before you decided to get into a fist-fight with your TA. It's not my problem. Now, do either of you have any _more_ serious injuries?"

After a quick checking over, she sends us on our way, armed only with ice and band-aids.

Remus glares at me as we walk together down the hall towards the teachers' sleeping quarters. "This is all your fault, you know."

I turn to him. "My fault? How is this my fault?"

"You wouldn't come down to supper," he accuses.

I shrug. "That doesn't mean you had to hit me."

"But you said-"

"You wouldn't leave me alone." I interrupt. "And please, Remus, let's not start this all over again. Fuck your other wrist, this time I'll break your nose."

He nods. "Right. Well." He looks at the door in front of me. "Goodnight, then."

"Night, Remus." I turn my back to him and let myself into the room I've claimed as my own, shutting the door behind me. After the night I just had, I think I'll sleep the day out. Without bothering to change into my pajamas, I fall into bed and close my eyes. Before I have time to think of one of the stories I usually tell myself while trying to sleep, I'm out.

*

"Arnica!" I call. She's floating away from me, and I'm chasing after her. "Hey, wait!"

She smiles vaguely and waves at me in a sort of distracted way, as though she doesn't even recognize me. She turns around in her pumpkin and starts talking to the people sitting behind her.

"Guys!" I yell. It's Aradia and Sarai she's talking to! "Guys, wait up! Hey! Where are you going?" The two of them wave at me over Arnica's shoulder and turn back to their conversation. "Oh fuck no," I mutter. "You guys are not getting away from me now. You're too fucking close…" I start running towards them, but they're going too fast, I can't catch them. No matter how fast I run, I won't be able to fly up to meet them. I stop, staring after them, but now there are more pumpkins, and they're starting to go slower. I think, maybe, if I hop one of the pumpkins, I might be able to catch up to them. I grab onto a pumpkin, if I hold on tight enough, I know I'll be able to float up to them, and talk and hug, and god I miss them…

I'm starting to slip. Fuck. I hold on tighter, and there's a popping noise. I look up at I start to fall, and James, my fish, is looking down at me in disapproval. "Honestly, Zoë," he says in a voice that sounds much like Remus'. "You don't know how to fly. You shouldn't try it if you don't' know how." He flips out his fins and starts flying towards their pumpkin.

"James!" I yell. I've landed now, and I'm watching Aradia and Sarai wave at my fish. He looks back at me in annoyance.

"Yes?"

"Can't you give me a ride up? I miss them!" He shrugs in that way that only fish can do.

"Sounds like a personal problem." He swim/flies off into the sky, which seems to be changing colors like a Snood background, and jumps into the pumpkin with my friends and my sister. I sit on the ground and watch as they drift farther and farther away from me, towards the one point of light in that weirdly changing night sky - I know what it is. The star of summer, the Dog Star. Sirius. They're gone.

*

"What time is it?"

Remus looks up at me and rolls his eyes. "Zoë, it is not time for the students to arrive yet. They will not arrive until at least dinner time, and dinner comes late. You know all of these things."

"But Remus…" I'm starting to whine, but I can't help it. "Today! At least Aradia and Sarai! Today! I'll see them today!" I don't' even realize I've said this out loud until Remus starts to laugh.

"Sit down, Zoë," he orders. I do, but only long enough to jump back up again. He sighs and lights a cigarette. I'm just sane enough to realize that he's gotten really good at using his left hand for these daily tasks. "Zoë. Sit."

I sit. It's almost like his smoking calms me down, because I'm able to concentrate on the lesson we're working out for a whole twenty minutes. Then I'm up and pacing again. "Remus, what time is it?"

He rolls his eyes, and lights another cigarette. Frowning, he pulls it away from his mouth. He shakes his head. "Zoë, you drive me to smoking."

I grin. "That's bull. You smoke cause you can't get it second-hand anymore."

He shrugs. "Maybe." He takes a drag off the cigarette, and I take in the second-hand smoke. Ack, I've had a second-hand habit for a while, but it's really rearing its head here. It's a wonder I haven't actually started smoking myself. "Look, Zoë." Hearing my name snaps me back to reality.

"Yes, Remus?"

"Take the rest of the day off. You're really not going to be much use planning lessons in this state. Take a nap. It'll help the time pass faster."

"Thanks, Remus." I grab a couple of books and tuck them under my arm before heading off to my room. I won't be able to nap. I know I can't nap. I miss them, and I'm too fucking excited to sleep. I open my first book. I really can't believe they managed to teach me so much in such a short time. Sure, they're the greatest magical teaching minds in England, but still… The fact that I can even understand this stuff will never cease to amaze me.

I read all afternoon. It's a distraction, and a damn good one. Otherwise I'd've thrown myself off the astronomy tower once I left Remus' office. I just keep it up, one page after another, 'til I finish the book, and then I start a new one. I do eventually fall asleep, but by that time, the sun is already starting to go down, and I know that if I have to look at one more word I'll go as crazy as, well… someone crazy, alright! Don't push me! Thankfully, I don't dream.

I wake up to Remus opening my door. It's dark now, and I think I hear him say something about a feast, Aradia, and Sarai, and I'm up. The books on my bed fly in a hundred different directions as I jump up and dash to the door. I don't even think that it might be rude, I just shove Remus out of my way and start tearing down staircases. I hear him yell after me… something about the practical studies classroom at the base of the Great Staircase, and I know where I'm going, and all I can think about is my sister, and my friend, and I'm there.

I throw open the door and right in the middle of a room similar to my high school physics teacher's class room, I see them. "Aradia! Sarai!" I yell. I'm crying, and we're hugging, and it's ok. I know it. Arnica will be alright, and they're alright, and everything's fine. I don't know how long we're in there, clinging to each other and sobbing, but eventually Remus walks in and tells us gently that we're needed in the Great Hall. They need to be sorted, and I need to be introduced to the students as an aide.

I nod to Remus, and start to lead my twin and my friend to the Great Hall. I think I'm babbling like a dumb tour guide, but I don't really care. They're here, and I'm here, and it's good.

I have to leave them at the doors. I hug my Aradia and Sarai one last time before taking my seat at the head table beside Remus. I barely hear Dumbledore tell the other students that he has to sort a couple of seventh years, I'm too busy watching the looks on their faces. They've been through so much. They couldn't really be separated now, could they? Sarai steps to the front of the room and pulls the Sorting Hat around her ears. It takes a few moments, speaking to her I think, and eventually yells out "GRYFFINDOR!"

She pulls off the hat, looking somewhat relieved. I'm not. Not yet. I have to know what's going to happen to Aradia. My sister goes to the hat, sits down, and puts it on. I wait, hoping beyond hope that it won't separate them. "SLYTHERIN!" the hat yells. Sarai pales, and I know she was hoping for the same thing as me. I catch her eye. * No, * I say with my gaze. * This is nothing. You know that. We are not going to separate, now. * She smiles, shakily, and I grin at her. It's gonna be fine.

*****************

Aradia

*****************

I opened my eyes, blinking against the bright sunlight. I groaned as I rolled over. It must be nearly time to get up. Lucius would be in any minute to wake me up.

Sure enough, as I was sitting up, Lucius opened the door.

"Good, you're up. What do you want for breakfast?" I frowned. He knew I never ate breakfast. I hadn't since I had been there.

"I'll just get some juice when I go down. I'm not really hungry. I'm still really not a breakfast girl." He looked disapproving.

"I just thought I'd offer, considering you are going to Hogwarts this morning. I thought you might change your mind. Well, get up anyway. It's time for you to get ready." He left the room quickly. I almost had the impression that he was mad at me, but I pushed the thought aside and headed for the bathroom.

After my shower, I put on my Muggle clothes. After a month of wearing only the robes that I had been given, it felt almost unnatural to put on my favorite red skirt and my black halter-top.

I checked again, making sure that I had packed all my school stuff. We had gone back to Diagon Alley a few days after the day that the riot had taken place. We had gotten the rest of Draco's and my school stuff. Lucius had come this time, seeming to want to ensure the safety of his heir, and, I suppose, me.

I was relieved that we would be getting away from the Malfoy manor for a little while. Lucius was really starting to get creepy.

I looked one last time at my packed room and went downstairs to sit with the Malfoys while the adults ate breakfast. (Draco, like me, was not a big breakfast eater.)

To my immense surprise, as I came into the massive dining room, I saw Draco sitting with his parents, eating an omelet.

"Good morning, Aradia." Narcissa greeted me, not even bothering to look up from her newspaper. "I trust you slept well." 

"Of course, as usual." I sat down quietly next to Draco. In seconds, I was bored, and I looked over at what Draco was eating. It was a mushroom omelet. I was even more surprised. Draco hated mushrooms, and eggs, for that matter.

"Hmm, those must be some mushrooms, huh, Draco." He smiled at me, the lazy smile he only wore when his parents were around.

"You can't even imagine." He never lost his lazy smile. That should have been my first clue.

"It smells really good. Can I try some?" Draco smirked.

"Sure, omelets for everyone." Lucius and Narcissa looked at us, seeming amused. That should have been my second clue. Narcissa never bothered to look up from whatever she was reading unless there was something really interesting going on. I ignored them and grabbed Draco's fork. I took a bite of the omelet.

Suddenly, I felt light-headed. It was an incredibly unpleasant experience. I felt like I had just donated a pint of blood. I heard myself swearing. Narcissa and Lucius looked vaguely alarmed.

"What the fuck was in that omelet?" I tried to shake off the feeling of light-headedness. It didn't work. It was, however, starting to become an almost pleasant experience. I was seeing everything through a faintly pink buzz. I took some more. The Malfoys laughed or smiled tolerantly at me.

"This omelet is full of magic mushrooms." Draco began. "They help me with the motion sickness. We'll both be on the train all day, and if I don't want to get horribly sick, I have some of these magic mushrooms. The only way they are tolerable is in an omelet. Unfortunately, I'm not quite myself when I eat them. I apologize in advance for whatever I do under the influence." Draco smiled at me in that way that made my knees weak.

He took his fork back from me and finished his breakfast.

"Are you kids ready?" Lucius looked at us, questioning. We nodded, and he led us out the door. We climbed into the back of a dark blue car and sped off. Our things had already been brought out to the car, and our owls were hooting quietly beside us. While we were at Diagon alley, the Malfoys had bought ma an owl, even though I had tried to stop them. They seemed to want to make me feel like part of their evil family. Yeah, right.

I stayed silent through the long ride to the train station. My head was still swimming. I felt numb. I felt like I had at that coven meeting in freshman year when I'd already been sick and then drank some wine. But without the nausea.

I think Draco must have understood how I felt. He put an arm around me. I think he was either protecting me from what, I'm not entirely sure. It was nice, though.

I don't really remember what Lucius and Narcissa had said as they dropped us off, but they left quickly, leaving Draco and I at platform 10. I checked my watch. We had about a half hour to spare.

Draco winked at me, grinning impishly at me.

"I thought they'd never leave!" Together we laughed. For some reason, this had been really funny. People were looking at us, obviously wondering who we were and what was wrong, but we ignored them.

I was just happy that I was at last free from the tyranny that I had dealt with since the moment I had walked into the house, living in Draco's closet. We linked our arms and danced our way to the barrier. I stopped before the very solid looking brick barrier, uncertain.

Draco put his arm around me. "Close your eyes, Aradia." I did as he had asked. He put an arm around my waist. We walked around for a little while, my eyes closed. At last, Draco said, "Oh, by the way, you can open your eyes now."

When I did, I was totally unprepared for the sights that met my eyes. It was as busy as Diagon alley had been, but this time, the place was swarming with students. There were students of all ages, from 10 years old to people my age. The closest thing I could think of was like trying to get to the parking lot at GHS, but about 10 times worse, and in a smaller place. I could hardly see the scarlet of the train through the sea of people.

Draco pulled a dazed me through the crowds towards the train. The crowd separated, letting us through. It was actually pretty easy to do. Most of the people were still saying goodbyes to families, so the train was still pretty empty. We quickly found a seat in the middle of the train.

I tossed my stuff in the place above our seats. I sat down, looking at Draco, feeling dizzy and light-headed. Draco threw his bags easily up next to mine. He sat down next to me. He put his arm around me, over my shoulders. It was a nice feeling, his arm holding me down so I didn't float off the planet. And I didn't feel like I was being crowded too much. That was nice too.

I looked out the window, enjoying the silence and serenity of our little world, watching the turbulent uproar of the world outside. The crowds thinned. Students began to board the train; parents began to leave. There was a horn to announce that the train was about to leave. That's when I saw them. 

There was a boy, wearing what looked like some interesting makeup. He was running towards the train. Next to him was a girl. She was tall, with dark hair and skin. Her face looked like Arnica… but it couldn't have been. Arnica wasn't that thin, and she never ran, never… but… She stopped her run, taking an agonized look first behind her, then at the train. The boy she was with got on, but she started to run in the other direction, towards a large, black dog.

I leapt from my warm seat next to Draco. He looked startled, but I didn't have time to think about that. I opened the window, throwing myself halfway out in one lunge. It didn't seem to matter anymore if I ever got to Hogwarts. Because there was Arnica, and she wasn't coming.

I tried to scramble out the open window, but I felt something grab my legs. That something pulled me back in the window. I fought him, but he was much, much stronger. Her held me hard as I tried to go back to that window. I couldn't escape.

The train moved faster, speeding away from the station, away from Arnica.

"Okay, now, sit down, now." Draco tried to push me down into the seat. "_Never_ do that again." There was a commanding tone in Draco's voice that I didn't like.

"Don't you ever, _ever_ tell me what to do." I glared at him, putting all the affection I felt for him aside.

He raised his eyebrows, mildly impressed, but mostly disdainful. I didn't like that arrogant look on his face. I felt a strong urge to slap it off.

"No, Draco, _for once_, you will listen to me." I knew I was being a little unfair, but I kept going. "I have been away from my friends, my family for an entire summer. I have lived in your closet for most of that time. I'm tired. I'm homesick. I just saw a friend of mine, and she didn't get on the train. If only I had gotten to her, everything would have been all right." I drew a shuddering breath, tears streaming down my face.

"That was Arnica. Arnica always makes everything okay. She has, I don't know, _something_ that could have made it all better, fixed everything. And I miss her, and my twin sister, Zoe, and I miss Sarai. I wanted to get off the train. I wanted to go see Arnica, and if I had it would be all better by now, but you stopped me. You stopped me!" I couldn't go on. I was crying too hard.

Draco's former arrogance melted away, as if it had never even been there. He took me into his arms and just held me. I cried for about a half hour. It seemed like forever. When no more tears would come, I looked up at Draco. Somehow we had ended up sitting, me on his lap. I forced a laugh.

"It's been a long time since I had a breakdown. I guess it was about time for one." He laughed as I laughed, wiping my eyes and getting off his lap, sitting next to him. He put his arm back around me.

"So, are you feeling better?" I nodded.

"I think I'll take a nap. Maybe get rested and refreshed before I get to a new school. Could you do me a favor?" Draco nodded. "Be nice, at least for this train ride, and leave everyone alone. It would make me feel better if you did." He nodded again, silent.

"Okay. Thank you. I'm going to sleep now." I curled up on the seat, resting my head on Draco's lap. He began to gently stroke my hair. I fell asleep almost as soon as my eyes closed.

* * * * *

The soft click of the door shutting woke me up from my deep sleep. I sat up, realizing that Draco's lap was no longer cushioning my head. I saw Draco standing at the door. He looked vaguely unfocused. I realized that he was still high off the mushrooms, and that my head was totally clear.

"Where did you go?" I looked at him, praying that he hadn't broken his promise to me. Praying that his leaving had been innocent.

"I, um, went to get some candy." He smiled smoothly, not missing a beat.

"Really?" He nodded. "So where is it?" He looked confused. I began again, more slowly. "If you left me to go get some candy, then where is that candy that you went to get?" He nodded and smiled greasily again, reminding me very much of a politician.

"I already ate it. I thought I'd give you some time to sleep, rest off the effects of breakfast. So I wandered around the train for a little while. I had a couple chocolate frogs. I visited with Crabbe and Goyle for a bit. And here I am." He smiled again. "Oh, and, by the way, you might want to get changed. We'll be getting to school any time now." He pulled a bag down from the space above our heads and pulled a black robe from it.

I rolled my eyes and got up, getting down my own bag and pulling my own robe from it. Draco left wordlessly to get changed, letting me have this space to change in.

I closed the door, charming it so that it would stay locked until I took it off. I wanted a little while to think. I changed into my flowing black wizard's robes as I fumed.

He'd broken his promise to me. I knew it. He had gone and bugged Harry and Ron and Goddess knew who else. All while I was sleeping peacefully in here.

"How _could_ he?!" I found myself speaking out loud, yelling at the person who wasn't even there. I paced in helpless rage. I stopped in my pacing and threw my skirt and top into one of my bags. I didn't bother to fold them, just balled them, throwing them in. I sat down in the seat and took a few breaths to calm myself down a bit.

When I was rational again, I thought for a minute. He really couldn't help it, could he? Not only was it his habit to do this, but he was also under the influence of drugs that had made _me_ try to jump out the window of a moving train. I almost smiled to myself. And he had apologized beforehand for how he would act. I unlocked the door again.

The train had already begun to slow down when Draco returned to me again.

"Well, here we are." He laughed at me as I reached for my baggage. "Leave all your things. They will be brought to your room for you." I nodded, feeling nervousness come over me.

"Okay, then, let's go." I had tried to sound brave, but my voice sounded a little shaky, even to me. Draco took my hand and kidded it.

"You'll be fine, Aradia. Just relax." He kept hold of my hand as we walked through the moonlight to a carriage. I was amazed to find that there really was nothing pulling the carriage. I had begun to actually feel confident as we started out. Then I saw he castle.

It was so big that it was scary. It was a real castle. It was no longer just a picture from a movie or an image from a book. It was _real_. I had the sudden urge to turn back and run and hide in the train. Instead, I just held Draco's hand a little tighter. He smiled, understanding.

We rode silently, watching the already huge castle grow bigger, blocking the moon as it tried to rise higher in the sky. After what felt like hours, the horseless carriages jolted to a stop. 

Draco pulled me out of the carriage, as if I wouldn't have come on my own. We walked into the huge crowd of people. Draco kept hold of my hand as he tried to fight his way to the castle itself, where a very old man with a very long beard and glasses stood.

I kept my eyes on the man as we slowly fought our way through. As I watched, a red haired guy climbed the stairs. I realized that this must be a Weasley. He was walking behind a short guy with black hair and glasses. I found myself looking for that scar that would have identified him to me as Harry Potter. Bringing up the rear, behind the Weasley was a girl I would have known _anywhere_.

I let out a piercing scream and started to claw my way through the crowd. I had let go of Draco's hand. The crowd parted a little, surprised at the girl screaming and fighting to get through. I threw myself forward, and the crowd began to split. 

I heard another scream, but I ignored it, not even looking up from the ground as I ran. I didn't even see Sarai running towards me until we crashed together in a massive hug.

For the second time that day, I began to cry. The difference between this time and the last time was that this time I was crying for joy.

I dimly heard a male voice say, "Welcome to Hogwarts."

I found myself babbling, trying to talk about my long summer with the Malfoys while listening to Sarai babble about her golden times at the Burrow.

Somehow in all this confusion, I found myself herded into a room that looked an awful lot like Mr. Crowley's room at GHS. By now, Sarai and I had calmed down enough to make some sense.

"I missed you so much! Have you seen any of the others?" I shook my head. "I saw you once and Arnica outside that train, but I haven't spoken to anyone except you, now. Have you?"

Sarai wasn't given time to answer. Instead, another girl came flying into the room. For a brief, irrational moment, I thought that we were being attacked by… someone.

"Aradia! Sarai!" I recognized the face and the voice of my twin as she grabbed Zoe and me into another huge hug.

"Zoe!" Sarai and I shrieked in unison. I felt myself crying again for the third time that day.

We began to babble again, but we were soon interrupted by a very severe looking woman with black hair and little round glasses.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I need the three of you in the Great Hall. Zoe, you need to be introduced as Professor Lupin's student aide. You two need to be sorted. That is, if you are interested in being students here." She looked us over and sighed. I felt like I was being examined by Narcissa. "I'll give you one minute to make yourselves presentable. After that, Zoe, I think you can manage to lead them to the Great Hall." The woman left us alone.

I saw a mirror in the corner of the room. I went to it, looking at my reflection. I cupped my hands, calling some water forth so I could slick down my unruly hair a little. I splashed my face with the cold water, trying to remove the signs that I'd been crying. I dried up the water with a little fire before it could touch the floor. I dried my face with the hem of my robes.

I looked at my reflection again. I was almost presentable. I'm sure that the Malfoys would not agree, but they weren't here to worry about just now. I turned to the others.

"Ready?"

Zoe led us to the Great Hall. I was amazed at how, well, big it was. When we walked into the room, every pair of eyes turned towards us. I could dimly make out Draco sitting at a table with two huge guys that reminded me of football players.

"Okay." The woman who had to be professor McGonagall began to give announcements. "You may recognize Professor Lupin. He will be again filling the Defense Against the Dark Arts position. He also has a new teacher's assistant. Her name is Zoe Shields." Zoe hugged us one last time and went to sit next to a man who I guessed was Professor Lupin.

"And we have two new seventh year students this year. Sarai Hansen and Aradia Harmon. As they are new to Hogwarts, they will be sorted now." She held out the hat. "Sarai Hansen."

All of the people in the room watched Sarai as she walked to the stool. She sat down and put the tattered hat on her head. Her eyes were closed. I could imagine that she was thinking something along the lines of "Not Hufflepuff!" I smiled, remembering all the times we had discussed the Hogwarts four.

In seconds, though, the hat called out, "Gryffindor!" Sarai smiled and got up gracefully, leaving the hat and going to sit with Ron and Harry and a few other people.

"Aradia Harmon." I was almost surprised to hear my own name called. I felt my legs carrying me to the stool. I could feel every eye looking at me. I sat on the stool, pretending that I wasn't feeling nervous or self-conscious. I put the ancient hat on my head.

Hmmm… You have a good mind here, but then, you knew that, didn't you. A little cocky, aren't you. And you're pretty loyal too… But no, I'm not going to put you in Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff. You need to be in the same house as… Well, you can't have it all, you know. So, here's the dilemma. Do I put you in Gryffindor with your friend, or the sinister Slytherin with… Him? I almost laughed at the mock dark tone the hat had adopted.

Well, there won't be much of a difference soon, so I guess I'll give you to SLYTHERIN for now.


End file.
